Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

What kind of marriage is this? That is so messed up. Every year for my birthday my husband books me a fancy hotel room. One of my favorite nights of the year - I just go and chill. But to lie about it? WTF.

Op here. I think this is what I need and will start with. I want to book a hotel room for myself with a nice spa.

Do it. Honestly, it makes me a better wife and mother. And the reason I do it this way, is because my husband would not necessarily approve or there would be all sorts of strings attached. When I feel a lot of stress, I just pick a day that looks relatively clear of responsibilities and then I have some long lost friend or relative come to a city not too far from here and I go meet them. A woman has to do what a woman has to do. And I don't have to tell everyone everything - god knows with motherhood, there is a massive lack of privacy anyways.

+1 - I started taking short personal mini-retreats about three years ago. Once per year, I go away by myself, for one night or two, to just be by myself. I never go farther than 2 hours drive away to make it easier. Sometimes I do annual goal planning (I'm a planner so it's oddly relaxing to have quiet time to reflect and think about what I want for the year). Sometimes I just read, watch bad tv and hang out. But it's always relaxing and always worth it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

What kind of marriage is this? That is so messed up. Every year for my birthday my husband books me a fancy hotel room. One of my favorite nights of the year - I just go and chill. But to lie about it? WTF.

Op here. I think this is what I need and will start with. I want to book a hotel room for myself with a nice spa.

Why not ask for this for Christmas?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

What kind of marriage is this? That is so messed up. Every year for my birthday my husband books me a fancy hotel room. One of my favorite nights of the year - I just go and chill. But to lie about it? WTF.

Op here. I think this is what I need and will start with. I want to book a hotel room for myself with a nice spa.

Do it. Honestly, it makes me a better wife and mother. And the reason I do it this way, is because my husband would not necessarily approve or there would be all sorts of strings attached. When I feel a lot of stress, I just pick a day that looks relatively clear of responsibilities and then I have some long lost friend or relative come to a city not too far from here and I go meet them. A woman has to do what a woman has to do. And I don't have to tell everyone everything - god knows with motherhood, there is a massive lack of privacy anyways.

My break is going to work. What I want is a break from evening duties. I want to go out for happy hour, not do bedtime, not make dinner, not have to figure out what to leave /order for dinner.

I need a break RIGHT NOW which is exactly why I'm on DCUM. Home from school for like an hour and already everyone is yelling at each other.

But seriously, I have been lucky enough that even though I SAH (with 2 young kids and 1 school aged) we have a sitter/nanny come for one full day a week. I usually spend part of that time alone with one kid, and I spend part of the time getting crap done, and I often sneak in a daytime date with DH. But sometimes I just spend the time totally alone. I come back so much more refreshed!!

You need a break. You need a REGULAR break, not 2 weeks away. You need something you can look forward to every single week. Whether it's trading off with another mom, or hiring a babysitter, or having DH do serious kid duty on the weekend, you need something you can look forward to when the kids get overwhelming.

You should get multiple breaks a week from your kids and then you wouldn’t feel like you needed two weeks

Anonymous wrote:I’m a SAHM of 3 and just dying for a break. My toddler is driving me nuts. I told DH I wanted to go away for 2 weeks and be just stared at me blankly. I don’t want a trip with friends or him. I just want to be alone.

I hear you. Two weeks is probably not realistic, but what about an afternoon or a weekend day? If DH can't take the kids, then what about a grandparent, a fellow parent, or even a sitter? DH and I made a deal that we each get one solo night out a week. I now use mine for my hobby, but I used to just go to the movies or to dinner by myself. It was a real lifeline for me when the kids were really little, and I only had 2!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

What kind of marriage is this? That is so messed up. Every year for my birthday my husband books me a fancy hotel room. One of my favorite nights of the year - I just go and chill. But to lie about it? WTF.

Op here. I think this is what I need and will start with. I want to book a hotel room for myself with a nice spa.

Anonymous wrote:I need a break from this life. A permanent one.

I assume you are joking, but if not, please seek help. National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255.

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

What kind of marriage is this? That is so messed up. Every year for my birthday my husband books me a fancy hotel room. One of my favorite nights of the year - I just go and chill. But to lie about it? WTF.

I need a break from this life. A permanent one.

My three year old is in PreK; I think I'd go nuts otherwise.

Hope you get the break you need, mama.

me!!! i would LOVE a weekend alone, without son or husband. love them both to pieces, but MAMA IS TIRED.

I don't blame you. I frequently take a "mental health" day to hang out by myself. I tell my husband I'm going to meet friends for the night. He probably thinks I'm having an affair but the reality is, I'd rather spend the night alone in a hotel than have sex with someone!!!

I’m a SAHM of 3 and just dying for a break. My toddler is driving me nuts. I told DH I wanted to go away for 2 weeks and be just stared at me blankly. I don’t want a trip with friends or him. I just want to be alone.