After my third baby was born I had a local college girl come by a few afternoon a week for 2-3 hours to do things with my 4 and 2 year old. They’d go to the park or the library or just play in the yard which were things difficult for me to do with a new born. It also gave me time to do the million household things we all have to deal with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I had a mother's helper I had her unload the dishwasher, and fold baskets and baskets of kid laundry. I'd also have her organize the toys/books.

+1 I'd love to have someone do this, also go through my kids' drawers and pull out everything in the sizes they've outgrown.

I hired a 7th grader, and she would do that too. She would also put a week's worth of outfits together at a time. She'd play with the kids too, and was naturally good at incorporating them into whatever she was doing. Sometimes not the way I would have done, but it was fine.

In college I was a mother’s helper. I made dinner, got the kids bathed and put the older kid to bed while she nursed the baby. When the baby was older, it’s switch which kid we put to bed. I loved with them for just over a year

I was a mother's helper in middle school for a neighbor with a 2 year old and newborn twins. I played with the 2 year old outside while she made dinner, etc. I was never given the babies to be in charge of.

I’d have her have one on one time with each kid, but largely your toddler. Have her do the messy projects (science experiments, slime, sensory tables, etc) that you don’t want. Have it be an enriching time for your toddler.

At those ages, my mother's helper usually took the baby so I could spend more time with the older child but this is really a personal preference - whatever works. She bathed both kids and played with both when I made dinner. She also cleaned up the kitchen after dinner, vacuumed and folded laundry.

For the newborn phases this is easy, but be aware that you have to make sure she has time with the baby or during the separation anxiety phases, baby may throw a fit if you try to pass her to the mother's helper -especially when you are still in the home and she can smell you. This is why it's best to start off early so baby knows and becomes used to the mother's helper.

Anonymous wrote:Hmm as much as I would like the household help, I asked her and her parents about “helping with the kids.” I offered 10/hour.

I think you have to have her play with the toddler, then, but that's the opposite of what you want, it seems like, based on your OP. Or she could hold/play with the baby while you play with toddler in the same room. That doesn't seem super helpful to me, though.

I dong think you are going to be able to use this to get more time with your toddler.

I would probably have her read or play with your toddler while you nurse the newborn and do some of the things around the house. If you do put her to work doing housework, I would do it all together. Like she makes a salad while you fix dinner, or you both fold the laundry together. I would feel pretty strange having my neighbors child doing my laundry while I played with my kids.

Hmm as much as I would like the household help, I asked her and her parents about “helping with the kids.” I offered 10/hour.

Anonymous wrote:When I had a mother's helper I had her unload the dishwasher, and fold baskets and baskets of kid laundry. I'd also have her organize the toys/books.

+1 I'd love to have someone do this, also go through my kids' drawers and pull out everything in the sizes they've outgrown.

When I had a mother's helper I had her unload the dishwasher, and fold baskets and baskets of kid laundry. I'd also have her organize the toys/books.

Newborns sleep so much, I would just have the kid hang around to watch/hold the newborn while you play with your toddler. Or, conversely, they can play with the toddler or take them out while you nurse/feed the newborn. The might also be able to help with simple cleaning and straightening. What did you arrange with this teen, and how much are you paying?

A friend of mine had a mother's helper to do the little tasks that were a pain. She said the helper (an 11-year-old neighbor's kid) folded laundry better than she did, and she was cheap.

I’m fascinated by that recent thread with the mother whose HHI is 775k and she wants 24/7 help with her newborn and toddler. I have a newborn and toddler and a similar HHI. I didnt realize this qualifies me for night nurses and multiple nannies!! The “only” help I have right now is a cleaning service twice a month and keeping my toddler in part time daycare while I’m on maternity leave. I was inspired by that thread and I found a young teenager to help me with the kids for a few hours a day after school, once or twice a week. How can I best use this help? My main motivation is trying to get some one on one time with the toddler but I’m nursing the baby and she wants to nurse all. The. Time.