Why are you seeing a marriage counselor in the first place?

I just want to say you don't have to do the same thing he does - you don't need to spend the same money on the same 5 trips a year. I mean you can, if you want, but you could use want - a night out eery week, or free time on Saturdays or one or two bigger trips or whatever - its not really fair to say you have to get what he wants if you don't want that.

that's a lot of trips. He needs to put you first and take you on trips.

If uncertain, take a year to explore every option you can think of...or that we can think of for you.

Travel
Shopping
Home renovations
Rock climbing
Fostering dogs

Umm we can’t tell YOU what YOU are passionate about

Have a passionate affair with your neighbor. He may be your soul mate!

I love glass. Stained glass. Fused glass. Mosaics. I take classes as often as I can. I travel to take classes. I spend money on tools and supplies.

Who do you love? Who do you want to spend time with? (if you were dying tomorrow, who would you have wanted to see?)

Go visit them
Or travel with them

You need suggestions for things you enjoy?!

I would love a fund for me to go on rowing retreats! Row every day, eat good food. Maybe rowing could be your passion and you could take me along for company.

I would take a trip with my girl friends. But if they aren't available, look into Adult Camps where you learn something--surfing, cooking, etc

https://www.oprahmag.com/life/g27055445/adult-summer-camps/?slide=15

https://www.bobvila.com/slideshow/send-yourself-to-camp-this-summer-12-top-learning-destinations-44644#culinary-institute-of-america-boot-camp

https://parade.com/14072/catherineprice/from-surfing-to-cooking-19-camps-that-adults-will-love/

I would do spa trips-but with my girlfriends. Take up tennis, yoga—something good for your body. Or make “traveling” your hobby.

What do you like to do?

Marriage counselor says I need a passion to make things equal in our marriage. DH goes on golf trips to high-end resorts 5-6 times a year with his buddies. He would be 100% willing to have me join him but the level of golf they play and the amount (36 holes a day) is too much for me. I've tried tagging along in the past and it results in me hanging out in the spa which is SUPER boring after 2-3 days.

The proposed compromise is that I will have an equal fund set aside that I can spend on a hobby for myself. Looking for suggestions.