Only a godparent needs the letter.

Lapsed Catholic and recent Godmother here. They just asked what my parish was (same city but different parishes) but not if I attended. I was not asked to prove anything - baptism, confirmation, mass attendance - nothing.

It’s totally NBD nowadays.

Anonymous wrote:In a Catholic Church in the Arlington diocese? You’ll need your marriage blessed. And they make that a huge deal. Been there, done that.

My relative who is not married in the Catholic Church was allowed to be my child's godparent as long as she attended a one day class. Not all churches are so strict, call around.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Godparents really do nothing these days. My kids have them but, after the ceremony they don't even keep in touch so really would not worry about this in the slightest. It is just a formality and for pictures. That has been my experience.

That’s too bad that you’ve had that experience. That does not describe at all the relationship that I have with my godchildren or the relationship that my kids have with their godparents. We’re pretty active Catholics FWIW.

It is what it is.

Anonymous wrote:I understand it may be a formality but it’s an important one to her and her mother who had terminal cancer. I will also be named the guardian in her will so will have legal custody in the event anything happens.

Should have told us this detail in the beginning. Perhaps you should check with the Catholic church where the Baptism is occurring then. I'm sorry for your friend.

Some parishes are more strict than others on godparent requirements. Some will ask for a letter from the godparent’s parish saying they’re in good standing. Usually only one godparent has to be a Catholic in good standing, the other one can be a “Christian witness”.

FWIW, all 3 of our children were baptized at my ILs Catholic Church in NY and the church just asked if the godparents were confirmed and as far as I know didn't require any letter. I know for a fact that my SIL's wedding was not in a Catholic Church but there was no issue with her being our son's godmother. For our 3rd child only the godmother was Catholic because the godfather is my BIL who was raised evangelical baptist. I believe the diocesan guidelines were actually on the church's webpage with what the requirements were for godparents.

In a Catholic Church in the Arlington diocese? You’ll need your marriage blessed. And they make that a huge deal. Been there, done that.

Anonymous wrote:Godparents really do nothing these days. My kids have them but, after the ceremony they don't even keep in touch so really would not worry about this in the slightest. It is just a formality and for pictures. That has been my experience.

That’s too bad that you’ve had that experience. That does not describe at all the relationship that I have with my godchildren or the relationship that my kids have with their godparents. We’re pretty active Catholics FWIW.

You’ll probably have to do a call with the priest to be approved regardless. Some are more lenient than others. Mine just wanted me to say I’m Catholic (was conformed Catholic but no longer am). I’m no longer Catholic and would lie, so he wouldn’t let me be niece’s Godparent even though my husband is a pastor. Go figure!

If the church said okay, would you be willing? If so, let her research it with the priest. If this is just a reason not to do it, then politely decline.

Does it have to be through the church or can it be more informal? If it has to be through the church, tell her the situation and have tell her check with the priest.

I understand it may be a formality but it’s an important one to her and her mother who had terminal cancer. I will also be named the guardian in her will so will have legal custody in the event anything happens.

Godparents really do nothing these days. My kids have them but, after the ceremony they don't even keep in touch so really would not worry about this in the slightest. It is just a formality and for pictures. That has been my experience.

I was just asked unexpectedly to be a god parent for a friends newly adopted baby. I was raised catholic and have been confirmed but did not get married in the church and am not an active member of the church. Is there any way for me to realistically be able to become the god parent? She said I just have to be confirmed but it doesn’t seem like canon law would permit me since my marriage was outside the church. Also not sure if I could quickly join a church and get a letter from the priest that her church requires. Let me know!