Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:33     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here - my DS has a mid-January birthday so he's actually one of the oldest kids in his class. Drop-offs were fine last week, but he looked totally dejected at pick up and literally fell apart the minute he saw me. He's been unusually clingy the last two days; I make a point of saying my goodbyes and keeping it short and sweet. His school sent a class picture on their app and he just looked so unhappy - he's been in daycare since infancy and I'm frankly surprised that he seems so unhappy.

He's not in aftercare and attends a DCPS; I wonder if a half-day Montessori program would be a better fit.


My belief is that daycares/private preschools are MUCH more focused on nurturing and keeping the kids happy. PK3 at a DCPS/Charter is basically tacked on to an elementary school, and the kids are expected to fit into that (e.g., moving around classrooms for specials) rather than the other way around. And they are already starting with the test prep in PK3, and the teachers have to do a LOT of data collection for various measurements. For some kids this is fine; other kids would be much happier in a low-key program. Unless you really need the extra money, there's no harm in waiting until K for "real school." And by K, my July boy who could not cope with DCPS at 3 was more than ready for a full day of school!


As a PK teacher, I totally agree with this!
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:27     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'd try to talk to the teacher. But also trust your gut. Can you go back to the previous daycare at this point?



I reached out to his teacher and await her response. I can definitely send him back to daycare, but I'm going damn near bankrupt trying to pay for it and was really hoping Pre K would work out. I will give it more time, but if he has to go back to daycare, so be it

DCUM, how long should I give him to adjust? Another week? A month?


Impossible to predict. Maybe he's used to naps at daycare and not resting now? Or conversely maybe he hates having to lie still while he is supposedl to be napping.

I wouldn't be surprised if the teacher reports that he is happy and engaged through the day, but he is still drained (most charitable explanation) when you get him.

In general, unless I suspected it was unsafe or I would lose the backup daycare slot, I would give it a month.

Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:22     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:I'd try to talk to the teacher. But also trust your gut. Can you go back to the previous daycare at this point?



I reached out to his teacher and await her response. I can definitely send him back to daycare, but I'm going damn near bankrupt trying to pay for it and was really hoping Pre K would work out. I will give it more time, but if he has to go back to daycare, so be it

DCUM, how long should I give him to adjust? Another week? A month?
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:19     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:OP here - my DS has a mid-January birthday so he's actually one of the oldest kids in his class. Drop-offs were fine last week, but he looked totally dejected at pick up and literally fell apart the minute he saw me. He's been unusually clingy the last two days; I make a point of saying my goodbyes and keeping it short and sweet. His school sent a class picture on their app and he just looked so unhappy - he's been in daycare since infancy and I'm frankly surprised that he seems so unhappy.

He's not in aftercare and attends a DCPS; I wonder if a half-day Montessori program would be a better fit.


My belief is that daycares/private preschools are MUCH more focused on nurturing and keeping the kids happy. PK3 at a DCPS/Charter is basically tacked on to an elementary school, and the kids are expected to fit into that (e.g., moving around classrooms for specials) rather than the other way around. And they are already starting with the test prep in PK3, and the teachers have to do a LOT of data collection for various measurements. For some kids this is fine; other kids would be much happier in a low-key program. Unless you really need the extra money, there's no harm in waiting until K for "real school." And by K, my July boy who could not cope with DCPS at 3 was more than ready for a full day of school!
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:17     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
I'd try to talk to the teacher. But also trust your gut. Can you go back to the previous daycare at this point?

Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:11     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
OP here - my DS has a mid-January birthday so he's actually one of the oldest kids in his class. Drop-offs were fine last week, but he looked totally dejected at pick up and literally fell apart the minute he saw me. He's been unusually clingy the last two days; I make a point of saying my goodbyes and keeping it short and sweet. His school sent a class picture on their app and he just looked so unhappy - he's been in daycare since infancy and I'm frankly surprised that he seems so unhappy.

He's not in aftercare and attends a DCPS; I wonder if a half-day Montessori program would be a better fit.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 14:01     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:My kids are both August birthdays. Both had a hard time with drop-off/not really wanting to go to school in the morning. But once they settled in, they had a great time and had lots of positive things to say about their teachers and friends. They clearly liked school, especially after the first few weeks. At the start of Prk4, they both still struggled with going to school in the morning. Definitely an age thing. I'd give it a bit longer and check with teachers to see how the day is actually going.


I feel like this is how my little guy is starting off. Late August birthday. Fine on first day, but lots of crying at drop off since then, asking me not to leave, etc. But then I think once he settles in he is fine during the day. Different experience than our daughter who started PK3 at one school with no issue, switched to new school in October with no issue, and has always had easy transitions at the beginning of school.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:59     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
I'm sorry, OP. That sounds rough.

It sounds like your kid was in daycare, so it's not the first time he's been separated from you. Maybe give it a few more weeks? If you think your son just isn't clicking with his teacher, you could ask for him to be moved to a different classroom.

One of our kids didn't like PreK3, then also didn't like PreK4. We moved her for K and she LOVES her new school. I think she just didn't have good teachers at the previous school and it also might not have been a good fit. Younger DC is at the same original school for PreK3 and so far really likes it, but we requested a specific teacher who's great with kids. We'll see how it goes.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:43     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
My kids are both August birthdays. Both had a hard time with drop-off/not really wanting to go to school in the morning. But once they settled in, they had a great time and had lots of positive things to say about their teachers and friends. They clearly liked school, especially after the first few weeks. At the start of Prk4, they both still struggled with going to school in the morning. Definitely an age thing. I'd give it a bit longer and check with teachers to see how the day is actually going.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:40     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Has he been in daycare or another preschool before, or is he adjusting from being at home with a parent or nanny?

Is he just in PK or also before or aftercare?
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:38     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
When is his birthday and what style of school is it?
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:32     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Anonymous wrote:I know it's only been three days, but my 3 year old is utterly miserable at his school. How long did it take your preschooler to adjust to the new environment? I want to be reasonable and give it some time, but I'm not sure at what point I should consider pulling the plug and sending him back to daycare or looking into other schools that might be a better fit.

He might not be mature enough for school.


My July birthday third grader cried every morning until November.
And then he got over it.

It has only been three days.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:31     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
Ours never did. There's no harm in spending an extra year or two in daycare! Even the money isn't all that much more, when you consider aftercare and all the school days off.
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:31     Subject: Re:Prek - 3 adjustment
Why do you think he is miserable? What is he doing or saying?
Anonymous
Post 09/04/2019 13:30     Subject: Prek - 3 adjustment
I know it's only been three days, but my 3 year old is utterly miserable at his school. How long did it take your preschooler to adjust to the new environment? I want to be reasonable and give it some time, but I'm not sure at what point I should consider pulling the plug and sending him back to daycare or looking into other schools that might be a better fit.

He might not be mature enough for school.