Man, lots of unhealthy relationship comments here. Scary. My DW and I have been trying to lose together. I've lost a LOT more than her and I can tell it bothers her that she's not losing as much, but she encourages me at every turn. If anything my libido is going up with every pound I've lost and I make a point of expressing my physical attraction to her as often as I can.

I guess op fell off the fitness wagon...or maybe dw has him locked up somewhere.

If she fat too? Maybe she’s worried you will get thin and leave her.

She doesn’t want you to start looking good, that way no other women notice you.

Anonymous wrote:My ex-wife would actively block me from going to the gym.

My DH does not want to hear about a good workout I've had. He definitely will not come with me if I invite him to a class. If he knows I'm trying to lose weight he brings home treats.

My ex-wife would actively block me from going to the gym.

NP, this could totally be me. I've been losing weight steadily for 6+ months BUT slowly and I'm certain my wife is feeling impatient. She's supportive but wants to eat out every week and thats very hard for me

Anonymous wrote:Are you spending all your free time at the gym? Or low libido from working out and the 'roids?

More details needed.

If your fitness pursuits are taking you away from home and leaving her on the hook for childcare and housework, that would explain her unhappiness. Don't be a di@k.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Trying to get down to a healthy weight and am making good progress. But DW is not happy. Is this normal?

Is she also overweight? Is she worried you'll be more attractive to other women? Will she feel ugly-guily-shamed in comparison to the new healthier you?

I don't think it is abnormal. But it can mean other things, mostly about her self image and worries.

This. This is a very informal study of my own experience losing weight and seeing friends lose weight, but it seems as if a lot of the resentment comes from jealousy. The other spouse is often not in shape and not feeling good about him/herself.

But also, I think sometimes the other spouse feels neglected if the weight loss spouse throws a lot of time into the new exercise activities. I’m a runner for instance. When I was married (I’m divorced) I lost 30 pounds but I admit I got a little crazy with the running. I would skip social events or other things because I felt I had to get a run in. Our divorce was based on other things but I don’t think my focus on exercise over the relationship helped.

Are you spending all your free time at the gym? Or low libido from working out and the 'roids?

Is she cooking and you aren't eating what she is making?

Anonymous wrote:Trying to get down to a healthy weight and am making good progress. But DW is not happy. Is this normal?

Is she also overweight? Is she worried you'll be more attractive to other women? Will she feel ugly-guily-shamed in comparison to the new healthier you?

I don't think it is abnormal. But it can mean other things, mostly about her self image and worries.

Trying to get down to a healthy weight and am making good progress. But DW is not happy. Is this normal?