Anonymous wrote:OP. I’m a SAHM. We have three: 6, 3, and 1. The idea of being done makes me sad, but when the baby is asleep and it’s just “big” kids it’s so nice... So just wondering aloud if this would be a way to compromise. (I’m only 31 so there’s time.)

I posted a couple in front of you. We thought we were done too but could never quite take permanent measures. Why decide now? You can semi permanent precautions and leave it open for a while.
I must say now we’re trying to decide if the 2 year old is the last and I’m STILL sad. Many of my friends were so happy to be done, but I think some people just are wistful for another whether you have 5 or 10!

OP. I’m a SAHM. We have three: 6, 3, and 1. The idea of being done makes me sad, but when the baby is asleep and it’s just “big” kids it’s so nice... So just wondering aloud if this would be a way to compromise. (I’m only 31 so there’s time.)

One of the biggest pros is you aren't paying for two in childcare.

My co worker is 11 years older than her brother and 16 years older than another. She said the biggest con was being a built in babysitter for her mother who liked to go out a lot. She didn’t have her teenage years and she’s resentful towards her mom about it. But every situation is different. I’m 6 years older than my only sibling and now as adults we argue occasionally but get a long well. We did play together a lot as children and it was tough when I was in high school because I was also a built in babysitter but because my mom and dad worked.

I have this. 16,14,12 and then 5 and 2.
The pros - the older ones are like fun aunts/uncles. Different relationship than with siblings closer in age. The younger ones bring a happiness to our home that is nice during the sullen teenage years. The teenagers can't be crabby around a 2 year old and it's so fun to see how much they enjoy watching the younger ones grow up. I do think once they leave for college in a few years, the little kids will be a big draw to come home.
The cons - definitely logistics. Trying to find a family vacation that will keep everyone happy is tough. My teenagers ain't happy how loud the house is early in the summer. Their friends are all sleeping until noon. It's awfully hard in our house to do that. I also wonder how close they will be once the older leave for college.

My siblings are 11 and 13 years older than I am. We've always been close, but essentially had separate childhoods.

My DC are seven years apart. We have a good family, get along well, strong marriage and in general, a pretty nice family life and ties. But my DC are not as close as I'd hope, they clearly love each other, but the younger one has always had the feeling of being left out by the older child's adventures. Just too young to be included, so a lot of jealousy there over the years. I would not have had them so far apart if I had a do over. It's been tough on the younger child.

My neighbors have this - two kids (boys) close in age at the tail end of high school and a kindergartener (girl). They love love love her. Sometimes she annoys them but generally they are very sweet together.

Anonymous wrote:Tell me your experiences with big gaps between “generations” of kids — like, DC1-3 are 14, 12, 10 and DC4&5 are 5 and 3. (Not blended families — just a gap in the middle of the kids’ ages.) personal experience as the parent or the kid? I’m assuming all thing being equal it’s better to have more than one in the younger “generation”?

I'm confused. Do you already have five children? What is your question?

Anonymous wrote:My oldest brothers were 10 and 12 yrs older than myself and 8 and 10 years than my sister. Also not a blended family but my sister was annoys baby and then my mom wanted her to have "a partner" so actively tried right away after she was born. My brothers are like uncles to me. They always seemed like they were raised by different parents...like they got the young/broke set and we got the old/well off set. Both had advantages and disadvantages but all 4 is us agree the two "rounds" of kids are split into 2 different generations.

That is suppose to say "an opps baby" strange phone correct

My sisters are twins and eight years older than me. It was sometimes lonely being the one, much younger kid. They always had a friend on family vacations, etc. But they were pretty good about playing with me. I annoyed the hell out of them at times, but in general we got along. As adults, it took them a while to get past viewing me as a child, but we're fairly close now. We don't have the talk daily, or even weekly kind of relationship--it's more like a few times a year and we see each other every couple of years (we all live in completely different parts of the country).

Anonymous wrote:I only have two (boy and girl), but they are 5 years apart. They get on wonderfully.

OP. I’m five years older than my only sibling and that was nice for us, but that ship has sailed for my family! Wondering more about “clusters”.

My oldest brothers were 10 and 12 yrs older than myself and 8 and 10 years than my sister. Also not a blended family but my sister was annoys baby and then my mom wanted her to have "a partner" so actively tried right away after she was born. My brothers are like uncles to me. They always seemed like they were raised by different parents...like they got the young/broke set and we got the old/well off set. Both had advantages and disadvantages but all 4 is us agree the two "rounds" of kids are split into 2 different generations.

I only have two (boy and girl), but they are 5 years apart. They get on wonderfully.

Tell me your experiences with big gaps between “generations” of kids — like, DC1-3 are 14, 12, 10 and DC4&5 are 5 and 3. (Not blended families — just a gap in the middle of the kids’ ages.) personal experience as the parent or the kid? I’m assuming all thing being equal it’s better to have more than one in the younger “generation”?