Anonymous wrote:My cousin has a 5 year old child and she often leaves him with her parents. When his brother was born 3 years ago, he spent about 6 months with her parents. Whenever he stays with his grandparents, he never wants to go back home. There is so much crying. Recently I started thinking that maybe something is wrong at home... Have you seen/experience anything like that? Shouldn’t small kids want to be with their parents? I’m not close with my cousin and I wouldn’t ask what’s going on. She was a teenage mom and I always assumed she needs extra help with kids and her child just really likes his grandparents. Now I don’t know.

MYOB.

My son screams and cries for me whenever I leave him with his dad. Dad does NOT abuse him and we are married... kids have preferences. Big deal

I had a friend whose parents used to actively "dump" her wherever they could: friends houses, grandparents, sleep away camps, even sent her to live with her ballet teacher in Belgium for a year in 8th grade. She ended up with major depressive disorder. I'm not saying this is the case with your cousin, but abandonment does happen in all kinds of ways.

He bonded with his grandparents
At home, he has to share time / affection


Kids have their preferences, and it’s okay.

My inlaws have this family story about how they were moving to US from country of origin when one child was about 2-3 and he cried so much at the airport about leaving his grandmother they let him stay an extra few months until grandma came to the US too. This kid was totally bonded to his grandmother his whole life. Loved parents too, but felt especially bonded to his grandmother. Even now, years after head the, talks about how special she was. Nothing was wrong with parents.

Sounds like the kid bonded with his grandparents. Stay out of it.

Things might be calmer and more stable at the kid’s grandparents’ house, if it’s like teen moms I know. The moms aren’t abusive or anything dramatic, just young.

the kid bonded with her parents as "mom and dad." that is probably it.

My cousin has a 5 year old child and she often leaves him with her parents. When his brother was born 3 years ago, he spent about 6 months with her parents. Whenever he stays with his grandparents, he never wants to go back home. There is so much crying. Recently I started thinking that maybe something is wrong at home... Have you seen/experience anything like that? Shouldn’t small kids want to be with their parents? I’m not close with my cousin and I wouldn’t ask what’s going on. She was a teenage mom and I always assumed she needs extra help with kids and her child just really likes his grandparents. Now I don’t know.