Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. This is helpful Thanks! My DS is 6 1/2.

We just need to get him laced shoes and clothes with snaps, and I am sure he will learn fine. Just laziness on my part.

I bet he could do everything if you pushed it. But I don’t think it is unusual that he doesn’t. Still in the range of normal.

Agree. Truth is kids are learning later these days because there is no need, we have velcro shoes and elastic pants. I remember when I was in preschool we learned to tie on a practice cardboard shoe and practiced a lot. They don't do that now. I actually don't care when my kid learns.

Need leads to proficiency. Just like if we were a culture that ate with chopsticks, your kid would know how to use them. We don't, so nobody thinks it's weird that your 5 yo can't eat with chopsticks. My relatives in Asia do though when my kids go to visit. "Your 5 year old can't eat with chopsticks?!" They think it's so strange.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. This is helpful Thanks! My DS is 6 1/2.

We just need to get him laced shoes and clothes with snaps, and I am sure he will learn fine. Just laziness on my part.

I bet he could do everything if you pushed it. But I don’t think it is unusual that he doesn’t. Still in the range of normal.

Anonymous wrote:Bathe themselves completely on their own: 5
Tie their own shoes: just learned at 6 1/2
Wear pants/shorts with buttons or snaps and can do it themselves: all closures at 5, snaps and velcro at 4

PP here, we turn the water on for him and remind him that he has to get his head wet before he washes his hair. Outside of that, he does all his won washing, shuts the water off, and dries himself off. We waited on tying shoes until he commented on wanting to be able to. We bought him a regular pair of velcro shoes and a cool pair of lace shoes, he picked them out. He only wore the lace shoes over Spring Break, when we had time to be patient while he tied, retied, and tied some more, his shoes. He does a pretty good job with them now.

OP here. This is helpful Thanks! My DS is 6 1/2.

We just need to get him laced shoes and clothes with snaps, and I am sure he will learn fine. Just laziness on my part.

I have 3 kids.
My oldest probably started bathing alone around 7-8. I honestly can’t remember.

Around K-1 I made him learn to button pants / shirts. He didn’t learn to tie his shoes until the summer between 2nd and 3rd. He turned 8 in August that year. I can’t remember if he toed shoes right before or right after turning 8.

My middle is 7. I’ll teach him to tie shoes this summer between grades 1 and 2. I could probably do it now but I am waiting for summer free time he could button stuff in K - he had an easier time than DS1. He has probably been bathing himself since 6-6.5.

There is a difference between not knowing how to do something because you haven’t been taught and because you can’t do it. If the former, they can pick up quickly once you actually teach them.

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious too.

My almost 5yo boy just took is first shower by himself (soap, turn water off, put his robe, dry himself) the other day. Then he asked for help to put on lotion. My girl who just turned 3 is at the same stage.

None of them know how to tie shoe laces (still a long way to go in this one)

Almost 5 DS can do buttons, snaps and zippers if they are easy enough. About half the time.

In general, my daughter is learning independence faster. My son is just not that interested.

How about wiping? can we add that.

My 7 year old (!) can wipe himself, but doesn't always get completely clean. I don't know if it's something he physically can't do, or he just doesn't really care.

Anonymous wrote:When did your child:

Bathe themselves completely on their own
Tie their own shoes
Wear pants/shorts with buttons or snaps and can do it themselves

I feel like my DS is behind on all of these things. I don't want to share his age out of embarrassment.

DS1 will be 6 next month and he just learned to tie his shoes last week. He is not yet there on showering himself - I get the water turned on and set to the right temp for him, plus wants me to check if he got all the soap out of his hair and also wants help drying off after. I think he was doing most buttons snaps by and buttons when he was 4, although there are always some tricky pairs with harder snaps.

Bathe themselves completely on their own: 5
Tie their own shoes: just learned at 6 1/2
Wear pants/shorts with buttons or snaps and can do it themselves: all closures at 5, snaps and velcro at 4

Bathe - 6 for boys. Older for girl because of hair.
Tie shoes - right before kindergarten. So 5.
Dress - 4

Anonymous wrote:My kid (and most kids) started doing all of that stuff when I stopped doing it for them. It's really up to you.

True. Sometimes my husband is like "kids, go get dressed, put on your shoes etc.". I mentally roll my eyes thinking "sure, they can't even reach their closet". But it does help to let them figure it out. I've been surprised by what they can do.

I'm curious too.

My almost 5yo boy just took is first shower by himself (soap, turn water off, put his robe, dry himself) the other day. Then he asked for help to put on lotion. My girl who just turned 3 is at the same stage.

None of them know how to tie shoe laces (still a long way to go in this one)

Almost 5 DS can do buttons, snaps and zippers if they are easy enough. About half the time.

In general, my daughter is learning independence faster. My son is just not that interested.

How about wiping? can we add that.

My kid (and most kids) started doing all of that stuff when I stopped doing it for them. It's really up to you.

For DD:

bathe -- 8, though she still asks me to check whether she's rinsed all the shampoo out (she has very thick hair) so maybe that doesn't count
tie shoes -- 6, though I hated it then because she was so slow, it added like 5 minutes to our morning
button pants shorts -- 4 or 5? though she wears mostly leggings

However, she has a younger brother who is way behind where she was and who does not care at all about being independent like she did, so I imagine he will still be asking me to do this for him at 10. He is 5 now and does none of the above.

Bath: 5yo
Shoes: still not 100% reliable at 11yo
Pants with buttons: 7yo

When did your child:

Bathe themselves completely on their own
Tie their own shoes
Wear pants/shorts with buttons or snaps and can do it themselves

I feel like my DS is behind on all of these things. I don't want to share his age out of embarrassment.