There are consultants who specialize in helping find schools that have supports--more and more schools do, but some promise more than they deliver. One consulting group in this area is College Consulting Collaborative (I think that's the name--3 C's).
Here is a list of colleges that offer some supports--but I think this list may be outdated and in any case changing all the time as more schools add in supports:
http://collegeautismspectrum.com/collegeprograms/#NewYork
You might consider hiring an executive function coach from the get-go, if you can find one near the college or online (skype), to help with that side of the issues. You can also look for a college that has single dorms of that is preferred.
You will need to have a psyched eval that is less than 3 years old by the start of freshman year in order to get disability support services like extended time, notes, etc. It's important to do it after age 16 so they use the adult WISC--otherwise colleges may not accept it.
There are probably books on this as well, and the local high schools (at least in MCPS) have regular lectures for parents by consultants who share info on college for students with special needs.