Anonymous
04/03/2019 19:35
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
ZachF wrote:As I posted in another thread. When I suspected her and finally knew for sure she was lying to me, I confronted her. More than once I gave her the chance to tell the truth while she doubled down on the lies. I told her what I knew and she just made up ever more preposterous stories that would insult anyone's intelligence.
So yeah, I spied in her and it was so easy, I didn't require any special software or devices. I told her exactly what I knew with exact times and dates, and when she finally asked me how I knew, I told her. Incredibly, she still chose to lie, or change her previous stories to minimize the truth and everything else she could do to: Deny, Deny, Deny.
I don't care what anyone thinks about it. I'm not some stalkerish guy who need to keep tabs on a woman. Far from it. And while I'll agree that people are entitled to their privacy, you give up that privacy in a relationship when you lie and I'm forced to provide you with absolute facts you can't dispute.
It was that or just accept her lies. I did that for a long time when I believed and trusted her, against my better judgement. Against all common sense. Faced with the same situation, I'll do it again but I have learned to trust my gut. My gut was correct every time I chose to ignore it.
How was the divorce?
ZachF
04/03/2019 19:10
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
As I posted in another thread. When I suspected her and finally knew for sure she was lying to me, I confronted her. More than once I gave her the chance to tell the truth while she doubled down on the lies. I told her what I knew and she just made up ever more preposterous stories that would insult anyone's intelligence.
So yeah, I spied in her and it was so easy, I didn't require any special software or devices. I told her exactly what I knew with exact times and dates, and when she finally asked me how I knew, I told her. Incredibly, she still chose to lie, or change her previous stories to minimize the truth and everything else she could do to: Deny, Deny, Deny.
I don't care what anyone thinks about it. I'm not some stalkerish guy who need to keep tabs on a woman. Far from it. And while I'll agree that people are entitled to their privacy, you give up that privacy in a relationship when you lie and I'm forced to provide you with absolute facts you can't dispute.
It was that or just accept her lies. I did that for a long time when I believed and trusted her, against my better judgement. Against all common sense. Faced with the same situation, I'll do it again but I have learned to trust my gut. My gut was correct every time I chose to ignore it.
So yeah, I spied in her and it was so easy, I didn't require any special software or devices. I told her exactly what I knew with exact times and dates, and when she finally asked me how I knew, I told her. Incredibly, she still chose to lie, or change her previous stories to minimize the truth and everything else she could do to: Deny, Deny, Deny.
I don't care what anyone thinks about it. I'm not some stalkerish guy who need to keep tabs on a woman. Far from it. And while I'll agree that people are entitled to their privacy, you give up that privacy in a relationship when you lie and I'm forced to provide you with absolute facts you can't dispute.
It was that or just accept her lies. I did that for a long time when I believed and trusted her, against my better judgement. Against all common sense. Faced with the same situation, I'll do it again but I have learned to trust my gut. My gut was correct every time I chose to ignore it.
Anonymous
04/03/2019 19:05
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
Anonymous wrote:If you need to install stalkerware on your husband's device, you need to get a divorce. it just screams unhealthy relationship.
I can understand greater accountability but checking his phone, car location, iPad, etc is ridiculous.
A friend's wife installed a keyboard logger on his computer, not to find out about an affair (there wasn't one), but to steal his financial information and passwords. She also downloaded his client's financial information, which is clearly illegal.
When she wanted to go to court with the information she found on the accounts, her lawyer told her no, she had violated a number of laws and it was best for her to not tell a judge she had been on his computer or in accounts or that she had been reading emails between her husband and his lawyer.
Anonymous
04/03/2019 14:57
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
If you need to install stalkerware on your husband's device, you need to get a divorce. it just screams unhealthy relationship.
I can understand greater accountability but checking his phone, car location, iPad, etc is ridiculous.
I can understand greater accountability but checking his phone, car location, iPad, etc is ridiculous.
Anonymous
04/03/2019 14:51
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
Doesn’t this fly in the face of all the DCUM advice that women do this to their husbands they suspect of cheating? I’m all for holding more women accountable. And yeah, I’m a woman. Just don’t like the double standard that a man who does this is an abuser but a woman who does this is just “verifying.”
Anonymous
04/03/2019 14:22
Subject: Criminalizing stalkerware to protect women from domestic abuse
In various relationship forums, I've seen recommendations for spouses who suspect infidelity to install keyloggers, plant voice activated recorders, and generally implement other types of surveillance measures. I had not really considered it, but these things also enable domestic abuse. Wired has an article talking about Eva Galperin's efforts to take a bite out of the industry to protect women from domestic abuse:
She has already convinced Kapersky to have its antivirus software flag stalkerware with a privacy alert and offer options to delete or quarantine them.
The article is here: https://www.wired.com/story/eva-galperin-stalkerware-kaspersky-antivirus/
"In a talk she is scheduled to give next week at the Kaspersky Security Analyst Summit in Singapore, Galperin will lay out a list of demands: First, she's calling on the antivirus industry to finally take the threat of stalkerware seriously, after years of negligence and inaction. She'll also ask Apple to take measures to protect iPhone users from stalkerware, given that the company doesn't allow antivirus apps into its App Store. Finally, and perhaps most drastically, she says she'll call on state and federal officials to use their prosecutorial powers to indict executives of stalkerware-selling companies on hacking charges. "It would be nice to see some of these companies shut down," she says. "It would be nice to see some people go to jail.""
She has already convinced Kapersky to have its antivirus software flag stalkerware with a privacy alert and offer options to delete or quarantine them.
The article is here: https://www.wired.com/story/eva-galperin-stalkerware-kaspersky-antivirus/