Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son and I talked about this recently... gay boys hang out with girls, girls transitioning to boys hang out with girls, lesbian hang out with girls but boys transitioning to girls have no friends so they keep it a secret.

These are non-binary kids I'm referring to. Not those who are in the process of transitioning to the opposite gender.

Correct distinction but the sentiment remains. There are plenty of non binary males. They are just not going to talk about in high school. We have just barely gotten to the point that other males accept gay males. It is going to take time for young men to feel comfortable. I teach on a college campus, and I see it in males and females. Though I am not one of those people claiming it is all trendy--the numbers are still low enough that my exposure is low, in spite of having 125 students a semester.

Even though we have made long strides in how LGBTQ people are viewed, girls still have more leeway for experimentation than boys.

A young woman who experimented in high school and college but ultimately decides to settle down with a partner of the opposite sex will have very little difficulty doing so.

A young man who does the same and is forthcoming with this information will have a harder time finding a woman who will accept his past experimentation and want to settle down with him.

Men think it's hot and secretly keep the hope that their wife will want a three-some in the back of their mind.

Women think it's odd and gross and secretly think that past experimentation between two guys means the guy is a little bit gay even if he says he's not now that he's older.

My DD loved superheros when she was younger but this was before there was a push to have girl clothes with superheros on them, so she wore boy's shirts most days. No one said anything. A little boy in 3rd grade came to school for their halloween party as a nurse (like his mom - wearing scrubs and fake badge that said Nurse Bobby) and he was teased nonstop. He's 19 now and it's still something he's known for. Boys can't win!

Anonymous wrote:My son and I talked about this recently... gay boys hang out with girls, girls transitioning to boys hang out with girls, lesbian hang out with girls but boys transitioning to girls have no friends so they keep it a secret.

These are non-binary kids I'm referring to. Not those who are in the process of transitioning to the opposite gender.

Anonymous wrote:Girls mature faster than boys so the ones that you are encountering in middle school may simply be more aware of their gender identity than their male peers.

High school. I am a high school sub.

It's a fad.

I also think young girls are more "forgiving". Other boys would be much harder on a non binary boy than girls to a non binary girl.

Girls mature faster than boys so the ones that you are encountering in middle school may simply be more aware of their gender identity than their male peers.

I honestly think because the pressure is so great to be a feminine-looking girl that if you don't feel you can measure up to that, you have to strongly and deliberately opt-out. So it's easier to just signal "non-conform" than to want to conform but not feel you are able to measure up.

Why did this get moved from off topic to the LGBT relationship forum?

My son and I talked about this recently... gay boys hang out with girls, girls transitioning to boys hang out with girls, lesbian hang out with girls but boys transitioning to girls have no friends so they keep it a secret.

Because in some ways it still sucks to be female in this society -- you get judged a lot more on your appearance, your behavior is more strictly regulated by parents, a spouse, etc; you are less well respected often by your boss, etc. You get paid less, you have to do all the housework in many cultures.

I think that a lot of thinking you're male may be about wanting to experience male privilege on some level. What's sad is the idea that boys think you have to "be a girl" to experiment with hair, makeup, clothes, and women may think you have to 'be a boy' in order to experience being powerful, successful and respected. What needs to change isn't your gender but these ridiculous gender norms.

Anonymous wrote:I think even in 2019 it is easier for girls to be more expressive than boys. I'm not saying girls don't havetheir own host of challenges, but it is not as easy for boys to step over or straddle a gender line

It's interesting because whenever I see it addressed in the media, they never mention that it's almost entirely a female phenomena.

Anonymous wrote:I am a substitute teachers who works in various high schools and something I've noticed but don't understand is why the overwhelming (like 99%) of kids who call themselves non-binary are girls. When you read articles about gender fluidity or non-binarism, you will see an equal number of examples of biological males to females. But in the real world this just isn't the case. I discussed this with a friend who is a lesbian who has a theory about this, but I'm curious as to what others think the reason is.

Girls tend to me more fad-oriented and gullible than boys.

I think even in 2019 it is easier for girls to be more expressive than boys. I'm not saying girls don't havetheir own host of challenges, but it is not as easy for boys to step over or straddle a gender line

I am a substitute teachers who works in various high schools and something I've noticed but don't understand is why the overwhelming (like 99%) of kids who call themselves non-binary are girls. When you read articles about gender fluidity or non-binarism, you will see an equal number of examples of biological males to females. But in the real world this just isn't the case. I discussed this with a friend who is a lesbian who has a theory about this, but I'm curious as to what others think the reason is.