Anonymous wrote:It's hard to feel like you are taking this seriously when your subject line says "class clown" instead of right off the bat saying ADHD. Many parents writing on this forum have said that while they recognize their children's behavoir is related to their diagnosis, they still maintain a firm line on what is acceptable behavior.

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like his behavior is targeting others to get a laugh at their expense. That isn't being a class clown. It is behavior that calls for discipline. I don't understand why you would say it is dngerous for your son.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion is to meet with the school counselor and work together on this. If he is impulsive, it is very hard for something you say at home to stick with him at school. And contrary to what a PP said, it actually is somewhat typical for ADHD kids to make inappropriate comments -- they don't filter the way other kids do. Often, they are 2-3 years behind their peers socially and they are looking for attention; when kids laugh, they view that as positive attention, so they continue the behaviors. You really need to work with the school, his therapist, and doctor to help with that.

Is he on medication for his ADHD? If not, it may be time to pursue that option. If he is on medication, you should consider whether it should be adjusted.

I completely understand the desire to punish the behavior, and you certainly can do so, but it likely won't make your son any better at filtering/thinking before he speaks. Essentially, you punish to make yourself feel like you are doing something and to be able to tell others that you are doing something, but punishing your son isn't going to fix this problem.

OP, above is the post you need to read. This is a high-risk time period for kids with certain special needs, and if handled poorly can result in cumulative disasters up to and including no high school diploma and juvenile justice involvement. But his disability issues also have to be considered--not meaning he gets to do whatever, but that the approach to such behavior is individualized. Social skills training that includes school/society's rules about serious issues.

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion is to meet with the school counselor and work together on this. If he is impulsive, it is very hard for something you say at home to stick with him at school. And contrary to what a PP said, it actually is somewhat typical for ADHD kids to make inappropriate comments -- they don't filter the way other kids do. Often, they are 2-3 years behind their peers socially and they are looking for attention; when kids laugh, they view that as positive attention, so they continue the behaviors. You really need to work with the school, his therapist, and doctor to help with that.

Is he on medication for his ADHD? If not, it may be time to pursue that option. If he is on medication, you should consider whether it should be adjusted.

I completely understand the desire to punish the behavior, and you certainly can do so, but it likely won't make your son any better at filtering/thinking before he speaks. Essentially, you punish to make yourself feel like you are doing something and to be able to tell others that you are doing something, but punishing your son isn't going to fix this problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son has always liked to draw attention to himself. But now in eighth grade he has used what the school system considers offensive language and his teacher is repeatedly making claims of sexual harassment. Recently he made a comment about a girl having her menstrual period and the teacher overheard the comment and pursued sexual harassment against him. I am utterly at a loss to get him to be able to control not saying these words and not needing the jolt of attention he gets from his classmates for saying them. We have spoken about it over and over and he just doesn’t seem to be able to reign it in at this point. He does have executive functioning issues and ADHD and there’s a lot going on. Has anyone dealt with this and found any meaningful and concise treatment for reining in speech related behaviors? Therapy is pretty slow going in terms of realizing what he’s feeling underneath that causes him to want to do this. I guess I’m looking for another route which teaches self-control and restraint effectively and quickly. The public schools are becoming a very dangerous place to be if you have loose lips. Any ideas?

Making fun of a girl for having her period is bullying, it's not "class clown" behavior. His teacher isn't "making claims of sexual harassment" she's accurately describing what she sees.

So the first step to him being able to understand is you being able to understand, and using accurate language when you talk to him.

If you think he's reinforced by attention, then look for a consequence that separates him from that attention, whether it's something at home (e.g. loss of phone, and grounding) or from school (e.g. suspension, in school suspension).

Anonymous wrote:My son has always liked to draw attention to himself. But now in eighth grade he has used what the school system considers offensive language and his teacher is repeatedly making claims of sexual harassment. Recently he made a comment about a girl having her menstrual period and the teacher overheard the comment and pursued sexual harassment against him. I am utterly at a loss to get him to be able to control not saying these words and not needing the jolt of attention he gets from his classmates for saying them. We have spoken about it over and over and he just doesn’t seem to be able to reign it in at this point. He does have executive functioning issues and ADHD and there’s a lot going on. Has anyone dealt with this and found any meaningful and concise treatment for reining in speech related behaviors? Therapy is pretty slow going in terms of realizing what he’s feeling underneath that causes him to want to do this. I guess I’m looking for another route which teaches self-control and restraint effectively and quickly. The public schools are becoming a very dangerous place to be if you have loose lips. Any ideas?

Anonymous wrote:My son has always liked to draw attention to himself. But now in eighth grade he has used what the school system considers offensive language and his teacher is repeatedly making claims of sexual harassment. Recently he made a comment about a girl having her menstrual period and the teacher overheard the comment and pursued sexual harassment against him. I am utterly at a loss to get him to be able to control not saying these words and not needing the jolt of attention he gets from his classmates for saying them. We have spoken about it over and over and he just doesn’t seem to be able to reign it in at this point. He does have executive functioning issues and ADHD and there’s a lot going on. Has anyone dealt with this and found any meaningful and concise treatment for reining in speech related behaviors? Therapy is pretty slow going in terms of realizing what he’s feeling underneath that causes him to want to do this. I guess I’m looking for another route which teaches self-control and restraint effectively and quickly. The public schools are becoming a very dangerous place to be if you have loose lips. Any ideas?