I started going to Catholic mass with my husband's family before we were married. As a non-Catholic, I couldn't take communion, and I wasn't very religious anyway, so I just sat when everyone knelt to pray and sat when everyone went up for communion. IME there were always others in the pews sitting as well, either for physical reasons (can't kneel with bad knees; belly gets in the way if heavily pregnant) or because they seemed to be visitors.

Now we're married and have kids and go most weeks. I have not converted so still do not take communion. Sometimes I'll go up with my kids if they want to see (they're too young for communion but can get a blessing) and sometimes we stay seated or we stand up but head for the exit instead. I feel a little weird but don't think it's a big deal and certainly no one has ever said anything to me. And, my husband actually won't take communion at this point because he feels like it's been too long since he went to confession.

Anyway, plenty of reasons for folks not to take notice that you're not taking communion. And I like the structure of the Mass and the routine. Give it a shot.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. I've recently started going to a different Christian Church but a handful of neighbors are Catholic and go to the same church, so I was interested to see what the service is like

I posted earlier that I don’t think this is the best way if you have never been before. Catholic mass is a little intimidating if you have never been before, and regular parishioners aren’t usually good at noticing a new face and introducing themselves. Unlike a lot of non-denominational churches, I think Catholic mass might feel a little unwelcoming to a new member.
But that doesn’t mean that there aren’t tons of people who would be thrilled to talk to you and very excited about you joining, make you a meal, and teach/argue about religion . You may have to seek them out a little though.

I have taught RCIA for almost 15 years. New members come in various ways. Some have a calling, some are marrying in to the Church, others just stumbled upon it by visiting different churches and felt ours was "home."

Many people start by just attending Mass. Most know that Communion, unlike in other churches, is something more for Catholics and don't participate in taking the Eucharist. That isn't being unfriendly but is an integral part of Catholic mass. Some stay behind in the pews or go up and cross their arms so the priest can give them a blessing. No one at Mass is judging them. I notice these people because 9 times out of 10 they join my class. If I didn't teach RCIA I wouldn't even notice them.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. I've recently started going to a different Christian Church but a handful of neighbors are Catholic and go to the same church, so I was interested to see what the service is like

That's great! I hope it works out! Feel free to post back here with any ?s or observations. : )

Thanks PP. I've recently started going to a different Christian Church but a handful of neighbors are Catholic and go to the same church, so I was interested to see what the service is like

OP, I think going to Mass is a lovely way to find out if you are interested / if God is calling you. Yes, just go to a Mass. I'd suggest sitting TOWARDs the front so you can see what is going on but still with some pews in front of you so you can copy when people stand, sit, or kneel. Yes, at a certain point about a 3/4 of the way through, the priest will say, "Let us share God's peace with one another," and people will turn to one another and shake hands and say, "Peace be with you." So, that is all you have to do. What church are you located near? Do you need any suggestions? God bless and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers! I am excited for you!

Anonymous wrote:The conversion process includes a year of classes that culminate in a baptism right before Easter. It’s called RCIA—rite of Christian initiation of adults—if you want to look it up. Most churches have 5–10 converts a year.

I did RCIA back in 2013. It was quite a lengthy process. Nine months of classes every week.

My class had I'd say 20 or 25 people in it. And that was the English language RCIA. In the next room was an even larger RCIA class held in Spanish.

Anonymous wrote:The Catholic Church really isn't focusing on drawing in new members. IME, you either grow up in the church or marry into it.

In the USA about 40,000 adults a year convert to Catholicism. Not bad if the Church "isn't trying".

But many of their converts are overseas. The Catholic population in Africa and Asia is growing enormously.

I don’t know that just going to mass is the best way to see if you are interested in Catholicism, and you will never become a member by only doing that. In order to join the Catholic Church, you have to go through a series of classes and sacraments. If you are born into the church, you do then during childhood. If you are an adult converting, then you usually do then in n adult RCIA class.
If you go to the website, there will be a number for the parish office. The secretary there can put you in touch with whoever is in charge of adult religious formation and RCIA classes. That person will very likely be able to point you in the best direction to learn more about the catholic faith and see if you are interested in converting. Usually, this will be a series of small group discussions that both Catholics and people considering converting participate in. Our parish gives a discount at the school if you go, so these are well attended, and not necessarily by die hard believers.
Anyway, that is where I would start. Call the parish office and ask who to contact about RCIA. That person will be able to point you in the best direction to learn more about the Catholic Church.

Anonymous wrote:I converted to Catholicism in college. Many Catholic Churches affiliated with college campuses are very visitor friendly. And, most have classes for people thinking of converting. Maybe find one at a college near you and check it out.

Interesting. What did you convert from?

The Catholic Church really isn't focusing on drawing in new members. IME, you either grow up in the church or marry into it.

It’s fine to go. Just don’t take communion. If you want to be polite, stand when others stand and sit when they sit. You can kneel if you want or just sit when others are kneeling. There’s a point where people shake hands and say peace be with you—it might be a little odd if you decline to shake, but otherwise there’s really nothing else to do.
The conversion process includes a year of classes that culminate in a baptism right before Easter. It’s called RCIA—rite of Christian initiation of adults—if you want to look it up. Most churches have 5–10 converts a year.

I converted to Catholicism in college. Many Catholic Churches affiliated with college campuses are very visitor friendly. And, most have classes for people thinking of converting. Maybe find one at a college near you and check it out.

Well, they have a much higher birth rate than most other religions thanks to their emphasis on no birth control and large families.

I read an old thread about how only certain Catholics are allowed to take communion and it made a Catholic service sound kind of uncomfortable for a visitor
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/476684.page

I was thinking of visiting a local Catholic church but this has me reconsidering it a bit. I don't want to end up embarrassed because of my ignorance of what to do. I guess I can just take a seat and never leave it and that's fine?

Between the scandals and the seemingly non-visitor friendly approach, I wonder how the church gains new members.

That being said, I'm impressed by the 'stickiness' of the faith with the Catholic schools, knights of Columbus etc. It definitely feels like a club that people wouldn't leave so easily once they join.