It sounds like your kid is being overwhelmed by the classroom environment. You can try earmuffs to cut down on noise, flash pass to take short breaks from the classroom and calming strategies for when he is agitated. School psychologist or special ed teacher should be able to help with calming strategies.

As a last resort, you can ask for a temporary transfer to an ED classroom. 5he smaller, calmer environment may help and the teachers are trained in de-escalation.

OP--

I am a career special educator and now work as an advocate. Kudos to you for trying to access private resources and specialists to help your child.

If you are in a public school, the school should also be taking steps to determine the cause of this behavior and to implement effective strategies. This behavior is not typical of a child in first grade and could be an indicator of an underlying but as of yet unidentified learning or emotional disability. If the school is not moving in this direction, the first step would be for you to formally request an evaluation. You can do this in a dated letter or an email to your child's teacher or the school's special education coordinator. I would recommend cc-ing the principal, and remember to request a "read" receipt on the email so you can tell when it was opened and read. You should reference the documented behavior concerns so far this school year and the need for repeated staffing changes, as well as the recent diagnosis of anxiety. The school is not allowed to repeatedly send your child home without also accessing their own resources to explore and address the behavior.

Your request for an evaluation counts as a "referral," which will start the special education timeline. Schools are required to meet with you to discuss your child's case, review data, and determine whether they have enough data to decide whether there is a disability impacting performance, or that they need to conduct additional or targeted assessments to gather more information. These may be standardized assessments, observations, or rating scales that you and the student's teachers complete. There are specific criteria that must be met in order to be found eligible for special education. However, the school could conduct a Functional Behavioral Assessment and develop a Behavioral Intervention Plan right now--that process is available to any student who is demonstrating consistently challenging or interfering behaviors in the school setting.

Again, these federally mandated policies only apply to public schools and public charter schools. Private schools are not required to conduct evaluations or provide special education services (though some try).

Best of luck.

Anonymous wrote:Dont do home instruction! The worst possible thing you can do for anxiety is support it.
You must find out what the cause is. Is your child super sensitive to stimuli like noise, light, touch? Is child panicking because they are being made to speak in the class? The teachers need to describe to you what specifically- happens before the acting out
You also need to request an IEP evaluation from the school immediately. In writing. You van find iep request forms online. Mail it to the principal via certified mail. They have 30 days to respond.
Franky, I wouldn't medicate until the iep plan is on place because it will mask the behavior they will observe and that is not what you want. You want them to see exactly what is going on.

No need to send an IEP request by certified mail. Email is fine and creates an electronic record as proof. Ask for the principal to confirm receipt of email.

Dont do home instruction! The worst possible thing you can do for anxiety is support it.
You must find out what the cause is. Is your child super sensitive to stimuli like noise, light, touch? Is child panicking because they are being made to speak in the class? The teachers need to describe to you what specifically- happens before the acting out
You also need to request an IEP evaluation from the school immediately. In writing. You van find iep request forms online. Mail it to the principal via certified mail. They have 30 days to respond.
Franky, I wouldn't medicate until the iep plan is on place because it will mask the behavior they will observe and that is not what you want. You want them to see exactly what is going on.

It was at this stage my pediatrician prescribed zoloft until we got in with a psychiatrist. I also kept my kid home (because DC was being sent home almost every day anyway) until stabilized. This exacerbated school refusal but really helped bring down DC's anxiety and behavior issues (we were seeing it at home and at school). We worked with a psychologist to slowly work back to school attendance over several weeks and kept up with school work at home in the meantime. My DC was in private school, but you may be able to get home instruction if you are in public.

wow. That's hard, OP. I would be interested in a physical exam by the pediatrician. Is there some underlying medical issue going on? How is DC's sleep? Diet changes?

Hang in there. I know the wait is terrible.

OP, I feel for you; your desperation is clear. What state/county are you in? I ask because if this is a public school, their handling of this sounds odd to me-they should be able to come up with SOME kind of accommodations to help your child, at least in the short term. Shuffling an anxious kid around to multiple teachers does not sound like a good idea (and how is a first grader even accessing a K teacher, who presumable has her/his own class??).

In VA, to start the IEP process, you request in writing a student study. At the end, they will decide if your DC is eligible for further study. If so (and it sounds like t), they will run a battery of tests and studies on them. At the end of that, they will decide if they are eligible for an IEP, and THEN the IEP will be written and implemented. They have 30 days to complete each of these steps (I believe-it might be a bit longer for eligibility?). It is not a short process, so start it now.

In the meantime, is there a special education teacher in first grade? Do they float to all the classes, or are they in one specific class? That teacher should be able to come up with some plans for DC. I agree with you that if the school is at a loss on how to deal with your DC, that is a bad sign, since it’s unlikely that he changed so drastically from K to first (having an amazing year to not being able to be around any other kids to focus/be in school). If you feel that they can’t handle this appropriately, I would have an advocate attend the special ed meetings with you.

OP here. To answer PP questions -

DC was reassigned to a new teacher. Unfortunately, that didn't work either. DC was in the new teacher's class for a day or two before starting to "acting out." Since then, DC has been shuffled between 2-3 different teachers every day, including the K teacher. These teachers were chosen because DC's seemingly good relationships with them. DC has been in school for almost 2 months now. This has been going on for all but 3 weeks of this time period.

DC is not on an IEP. The anxiety was diagnosed the summer before K. The anxiety did not impact DC's behavior in K. DC had a great year (but DC also had an excellent K teacher). How do we start the IEP process?

At this point, it seems that no one at the school can manage DC, not even DC's beloved K teacher. DC is all over the place. DC is in a terrible cycle right now. I assume the IEP and FBA process takes time...what do we do in the meantime? DC is falling further behind in school, and getting worse by the day...

Frankly, the school, as patient as they've been, doesn't seem to know what they're doing either. We're not expecting the school to have all the answers, but they seem to be just as lost as we are.

I know with my DD who has anxiety that wearing her out helps tremendously. She is on a rec swim team with 1.5 hour practices 3x a week. She gets too tired to worry. Helps keep her even. Something like that may be helpful to you while you wait for the appointments.

Anonymous wrote:I assume he has an iep? If not, time to start the process. Ask for a functional behavioral assessment (FBA) to help identify what is stressing him out.

The other thing is to consider antidepressant to help him stabilize his mood.

I would NOT NOT NOT turn to meds before exploring the environmental compontent! I have experienced myself (and heard too many stories) about kids who just needed to be in a more supportive environment, and their disruptive/externalizing behavior diminishes or disappears. Of course the underlying issue remains, but medication should NOT be used to make a child cope with a crappy teacher or classroom.

Take a deep breath. It will be ok. My son had the same issues when he was that age and it turned out he has ADHD inattentive. What you need to consider is changing teachers for someone who has more understanding and patience. How is that relationship working? My son's teacher was an ass (I don't say this lightly) and next year was MILES different because he had an amazing teacher. No tantrums at all.

See if you can push some of the appts up a little.

Anonymous wrote:Gosh, I'm so sorry. Very different scenario and age, but when my anxious DS was not coping with the classroom, it was intimately related to the teacher and teaching style. Is there any way you can try to switch classrooms? Are they giving DS time with the social worker? Where are you in the IEP process? TBH if there's any way you can just get him out of the classroom I would do that. Behavioral issues can just spiral and sometimes a completely change of environment is the only think that cuts it off.

Also ... the fact that you have to pull him from the classroom would be strong support for the IEP eligiblity. I don't mean to suggest you do so in order to improve your position in the IEP process, but rather that you understand what it means. Literally, his disability is keeping him from even being able to sit in the classroom. The HAVE to give him services.

I assume he has an iep? If not, time to start the process. Ask for a functional behavioral assessment (FBA) to help identify what is stressing him out.

The other thing is to consider antidepressant to help him stabilize his mood.

Gosh, I'm so sorry. Very different scenario and age, but when my anxious DS was not coping with the classroom, it was intimately related to the teacher and teaching style. Is there any way you can try to switch classrooms? Are they giving DS time with the social worker? Where are you in the IEP process? TBH if there's any way you can just get him out of the classroom I would do that. Behavioral issues can just spiral and sometimes a completely change of environment is the only think that cuts it off.

This is my only child, and I have no idea what to do.

Six-year old DC is in 1st grade. Since the school year began, DC has been acting out significantly. DC is now unable to sit in any classroom for any length without falling apart. DC was diagnosed with anxiety a year ago and we know that plays a factor, but now we're testing DC for other things (LDs, ADHD, etc.). We've reached out to other professionals for help (child psychiatrist, multiple psychologists, the pediatrician, etc.) and aside from the pediatrician, we can't be seen by anyone for another 3-4 weeks (that includes testing). Meanwhile, DC can't get through the school day without multiple "incidents" and DH and I receiving multiple calls/reports. The only time DC seems able to function is when placed in a quiet room with one of the school's administrators. We've met with the school leadership multiple times to come up with a plan to help DC get through the day until we can sort things out with the health professionals, but that "plan" isn't working. DC is becoming increasing agitated and aggressive. At home, DC seems fine -- not their usual happy self, but we're not seeing the level of aggression DC is apparently demonstrating at school. DC's anxiety does seem heightened in other ways though. We talk to DC and we get very little, other than school is "bad." We can tell that DC is suffering, but don't know what to do. We're at a complete loss -- we can't even pinpoint how any of this began. DC had a great K at the same school. And we're suffering too, seeing DC suffer. Does anyone have any advice?

Signed,
Desperate parent at the end of their rope