Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:buy him the yellow borat swimsuit and tell him how sexy it is.

but he sounds fun and playful, whether you buy some wares or not. go with it!

NP. Haha, I actually second the Borat suit or something similar for him, like handcuffs or chaps or something. LOL. Dose of his own medicine! Tit for tat, no pun intended! But yes, I’d also try to accommodate.

Yeah nothing's going to improve your relationship like mocking your husband when he wants to have sex with you.

Oh yes, because you sound like you have a good sense of humor and are pleasant in bed.

He’s hinting he wants you to step it up a notch. Why not do it and make him happy?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: He's also left lingerie from my drawer out for me to wear in bed before - like if I'm in the shower or something - and I'm not a fan of him doing that either, but can't pinpoint why.

It's because he's trying to get you to initiate sex (so that he doesn't have to) and you don't want to.

to be clear this is on nights when he already knows we're going to have sex..

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:buy him the yellow borat swimsuit and tell him how sexy it is.

but he sounds fun and playful, whether you buy some wares or not. go with it!

NP. Haha, I actually second the Borat suit or something similar for him, like handcuffs or chaps or something. LOL. Dose of his own medicine! Tit for tat, no pun intended! But yes, I’d also try to accommodate.

Yeah nothing's going to improve your relationship like mocking your husband when he wants to have sex with you.

It would bother me, but I cannot pinpoint why, either.

Maybe because it would feel to me like the bar was being moved continuously ever-higher?

Anonymous wrote: He's also left lingerie from my drawer out for me to wear in bed before - like if I'm in the shower or something - and I'm not a fan of him doing that either, but can't pinpoint why.

It's because he's trying to get you to initiate sex (so that he doesn't have to) and you don't want to.

Anonymous wrote:buy him the yellow borat swimsuit and tell him how sexy it is.

but he sounds fun and playful, whether you buy some wares or not. go with it!

NP. Haha, I actually second the Borat suit or something similar for him, like handcuffs or chaps or something. LOL. Dose of his own medicine! Tit for tat, no pun intended! But yes, I’d also try to accommodate.

You think you have a "decent" sex life. He obviously doesn't. All this talk about sexy clothes is a way of hinting he wants more (and more exciting) sex.

I sorta know what you mean. I had a boyfriend who did that and it turned me off. But since then, I've actually started wearing nicer nightgowns etc with other guys ive dated (nothing ridiculous like stockings but nicer things rather than boxers and tshirts) and i have to say they seem to like it. may as well, as long as it is comfortable. i get why you dont like him telling you to, though. maybe just go to nordstrom or online and see if you see stuff that is comfortable and a little sexier.

Gosh, I think it's nice that he likes the idea of you in sexy things.

Way back when dh and I were engaged, I came home from a business trip with some seriously lacy underthings on that I had bought while away. Dh's full response? "Are they comfortable?". No, you idiot, they are lined with lace. It's not at all comfortable. That was probably the last time I ever bought sexy underwear. Why bother? Count your blessings, op!

Anonymous wrote:well you could opt for the sexless marriage, that seems to be all the rage lately

lol (OP here) - sex life is good and I have no issue with that (nor I think does he - I mean I'm sure he'd love for it to be more but we aren't like those, once a month/year people or anything like that)! It's something about dictating the clothes that I dislike.

well you could opt for the sexless marriage, that seems to be all the rage lately

You should be flattered he finds you sexy
I would say I get it why it bothers you, but let him live a little
Surprise him with something you like.....

buy him the yellow borat swimsuit and tell him how sexy it is.

but he sounds fun and playful, whether you buy some wares or not. go with it!

continually encouraged you to buy 'sexy' clothes? DH and I have been married over 10 years and have two small (not infant) kids. We have a few solo (without kids) trips coming up and he keeps making comments about how I should buy different bathing suits, sexy lingerie, etc. He keeps bringing it up - like I'll forward him a sale email from a store we both like and he'll respond "last chance to get that sexy gear for [vacation location!]"

not sure why this bugs me. We have a decent sex life - but him doing this makes me feel somehow cheap, or something. He's also left lingerie from my drawer out for me to wear in bed before - like if I'm in the shower or something - and I'm not a fan of him doing that either, but can't pinpoint why.