Anonymous
08/23/2018 11:04
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yes.
I grew up poor...4 girls to a tiny room in a tiny one bathroom leaky moldy house.
I cried when we purchased our first house because it was so nice compared to what I grew up in.
Eating out, school shopping, vacations, stuff, all so much more than I could have ever imagined.
I worry about my kids living such a comfortable life, particularly my younger two. The older kid is more aware of our blessings but the other two just take it for granted as this is how "everyone" they know lives. My husband grew up as upper middle class, so to him this is just normal lifestyle too.
They are are always a bit jolted when we visit my family and they see how their cousins (on my side) live.
I grew up poor...4 girls to a tiny room in a tiny one bathroom leaky moldy house.
I cried when we purchased our first house because it was so nice compared to what I grew up in.
Eating out, school shopping, vacations, stuff, all so much more than I could have ever imagined.
I worry about my kids living such a comfortable life, particularly my younger two. The older kid is more aware of our blessings but the other two just take it for granted as this is how "everyone" they know lives. My husband grew up as upper middle class, so to him this is just normal lifestyle too.
They are are always a bit jolted when we visit my family and they see how their cousins (on my side) live.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 11:04
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yes!
I was always ordered water, never visited 7-11, wouldn’t have dreamed of asking for overpriced vending machine fare. We never once ordered dessert in a restaurant.
My parents used to fill up their tanks on Thursday’s, because the gas station offered free hot dogs. We’d go with mom, eat a hot dog, then go with dad, eat a hot dog.
My DD always gets a drink, her dad takes her to 7-11 probably once a week after school, just yesterday, I took her through the McDonald’s drive thru for a shake, just because. Last time we ate out, we ordered a dessert to share.
I also just want to give her the childhood I never had. And she’s mostly very gracious.
I was always ordered water, never visited 7-11, wouldn’t have dreamed of asking for overpriced vending machine fare. We never once ordered dessert in a restaurant.
My parents used to fill up their tanks on Thursday’s, because the gas station offered free hot dogs. We’d go with mom, eat a hot dog, then go with dad, eat a hot dog.
My DD always gets a drink, her dad takes her to 7-11 probably once a week after school, just yesterday, I took her through the McDonald’s drive thru for a shake, just because. Last time we ate out, we ordered a dessert to share.
I also just want to give her the childhood I never had. And she’s mostly very gracious.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 11:03
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
My parents didn't/couldn't get me braces as a kid.
I paid in cash as an adult for braces with one of the priciest orthodontists in downtown.
I paid in cash as an adult for braces with one of the priciest orthodontists in downtown.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 11:02
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Yes, though for me, it’s mostly labor/time-savers and vacations. I’m finally at the point that paying to have someone clean my home before a party is palatable. And I can go on vacation without calculating how many hours I need to work overtime to pay for it.
It's the labor savers that highlight how different I am from my parents. My parents would never have spent money on house cleaners, lawn mowing, grocery delivery, etc.
This is a new thing though. I grew up in an upper middle class area where most dads were CPAs, engineers, doctors, lawyers, etc and they ALL still mowed their lawn. Our house was set on 1.5 areas too and my dad was out there twice a week like clockwork. Now it seems like even middle class neighborhoods are all mowed by companies.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:59
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Anonymous wrote:Yes, though for me, it’s mostly labor/time-savers and vacations. I’m finally at the point that paying to have someone clean my home before a party is palatable. And I can go on vacation without calculating how many hours I need to work overtime to pay for it.
It's the labor savers that highlight how different I am from my parents. My parents would never have spent money on house cleaners, lawn mowing, grocery delivery, etc.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:58
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Happens to me a lot. I hid the fact that I have bi-weekly cleaning people from my mom for years - in my house growing up as an only child I was the "cleaning lady". I also spend a stupid amount of money on my kids and on luxuries I never imagined as a kid. My parents will sometimes make snarky comments about how much we spend or we make, but DH and I work hard for our money and are also very careful to save so I'm getting over it!
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:56
Subject: Re:If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
I think of this when I buy my kids shoes. We weren't poor but my parents were very frugal and shoes were strictly from Payless or K-Mart. My teens are generally not into clothes and have pretty small wardrobes but they care about their shoe brands and I don't mind spending $150+ for a pair of running shoes.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:56
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yep. My DH grew up wealthy and thinks nothing of going out to lunch every day. I literally can't do it (as I eat leftovers again).
And my kids think nothing of eating things like peaches and berries. When I was a kid those were extremely special treats only to be had in-season. We ate apples or fruit we grew and canned ourselves.
And my kids think nothing of eating things like peaches and berries. When I was a kid those were extremely special treats only to be had in-season. We ate apples or fruit we grew and canned ourselves.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:54
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yes, though for me, it’s mostly labor/time-savers and vacations. I’m finally at the point that paying to have someone clean my home before a party is palatable. And I can go on vacation without calculating how many hours I need to work overtime to pay for it.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:54
Subject: Re:If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
I grew up very poor. I cannot believe what I spend on DD's bday parties. By DCUM it is probably still not a lot but we always had a home party with sandwiches and a homemade cake.
Also coffee, I spend a ridiculous amount on coffee.
Also coffee, I spend a ridiculous amount on coffee.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:53
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
I didn’t grow up poor, but with way less than my kids have. We went to Build a Bear and spent an obscene $120 getting the kids their animals and my mom commented how much we had begged them to take us there when we were kids and how they really wanted to but didn’t have the money. The funny thing is that I have no recollection of this and had a very happy childhood even though my parents didn’t have a ton of money.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:51
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yes, the money DH and I spend on wine and eating out is staggering. I'm pretty sure my entire family of five spent less than that on shelter, food, and clothes growing up.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:51
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Anonymous wrote:The other day my DC asked if he could have a gatorade from a vending machine while we were getting an oil change. I said sure and we scooped out 1.75 from the bottom of my purse. I had a mental moment of how that would a.) never be something I would ask my mom and b.) because if we had 1.75 it was for laundry or dinner. We never got drinks…ever…like anywhere. It was always water or the occasionally free coffee from waiting rooms or something. I always think about things like this when I pick up my dry cleaning (I dont think I would EVER believe you if you told me when I was an adult I would have enough money to pay someone to iron my shirts) or take my kid to the orthodontist (the dentist was enough of a luxury!). I got one of those fancy bakery themed cakes once for my toddler (The Wiggles!) and it was 160.00. I felt so guilty carrying that cake into my car! I mean I would have died for a care bear cake from the local grocery store growing up let alone this fancy monstrosity. These feelings are a mixture of awww, shame, guilt and joy. Can anyone relate?
Yes I can. Though I still don’t indulge vending machines or impulse buys for my kid. We are strict water only unless at bday parties. I did fancy cupcakes for school party once and was shocked at the price (I hadn’t bothered to ask when I ordered). Now I only do grocery store cake/cupcakes for school. I love to bake/cook though so can easily do my own for at home. I spend way more on activities and clothes and sitters. I don’t remember ever having a babysitter. Starting in first grade I was just left by myself and even got myself fully ready for school and walked to the school bus alone because my mom had to be at work by 6 am and dad was out of the picture. The amount of money in my 401k amazes me.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:50
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
Yes! I can relate. A slurpee once a month was a treat for me and my siblings growing up. I spend so much money on my kid it almost disgusts me haha! I guess I just want her to have the childhood I never had. It's not a bad thing honestly as long as your child doesn't take these things for granted.
Anonymous
08/23/2018 10:45
Subject: If you grew up poor are you ever shocked at what you now spend money on?
The other day my DC asked if he could have a gatorade from a vending machine while we were getting an oil change. I said sure and we scooped out 1.75 from the bottom of my purse. I had a mental moment of how that would a.) never be something I would ask my mom and b.) because if we had 1.75 it was for laundry or dinner. We never got drinks…ever…like anywhere. It was always water or the occasionally free coffee from waiting rooms or something. I always think about things like this when I pick up my dry cleaning (I dont think I would EVER believe you if you told me when I was an adult I would have enough money to pay someone to iron my shirts) or take my kid to the orthodontist (the dentist was enough of a luxury!). I got one of those fancy bakery themed cakes once for my toddler (The Wiggles!) and it was 160.00. I felt so guilty carrying that cake into my car! I mean I would have died for a care bear cake from the local grocery store growing up let alone this fancy monstrosity. These feelings are a mixture of awww, shame, guilt and joy. Can anyone relate?