Can go from jeans to evening gown (or little black dress, cocktail gown, or any other expensive dress) in minutes = I want to act like you do not have to spend $$$$ to date me. But you do. Oh yes, you do.

Loves the outdoors = currently in between places

Anonymous wrote:African American man who states that he is open to interracial dating=I only date white women.

Professional, glamour shots (male)=[in your best Right Said Fred voice] I'm too sexy!

Generally true.

drama free = psycho, more drama than anyone else you ever met.

polyamorous = want hookups with lots of different people

self employed = unemployed but picking up work online like selling stuff on ebay, etc.

gamer = self employed

Divorced=I am either still married or very recently separated. I have met very few men online who are actually divorced with a healthy, drama-free situation.

Emoticons in their profile=I don't believe that woman can read, so I am going to create a neat picture book for you.

Only emoticons, memes, symbols but no words in their profile = I have only dated people through apps.

Contract driver= works for Lyft/Uber
Personal trainer= showed a friend how to do sits ups one time

African American man who states that he is open to interracial dating=I only date white women.

Professional, glamour shots (male)=[in your best Right Said Fred voice] I'm too sexy!

Emoticons in their profile=I was not born in this country.

No face or body photos but admits to being married=I am unattractive.

Bathroom selfie=the equivalent of wearing potty training pants in the online dating world.

Duck lip selfie (woman)=you need to adjust your search parameters to attract women your age.

Dead fish in photo=I expect you to cook and clean the house.

Entrepreneur = currently unemployed, but everyone says I have great ideas.

Ethical, non-monogamy marriage =cheating but too cheap, or afraid, to divorce.

Ethical, non-monogamous, divorced=I am free.

Polyamorous=creepy 70's ole school player who got the minivan in the divorce.

Nothing in the profile=I change what I want based upon the woman that I match with.