My kids are at a school with a high farms rate. There are pluses and minuses for sure, but a big plus is the small class size in the primary grades.

Anonymous wrote:Keep your decisions on a need to know basis and filter all the opinions. You are doing what you think is best. You can always change course later. Kids will be fine. You will be fine.

It's pretty normal to say where your kids go to school. It's not usually private information, like your salary or house price.

If OP is unsure of her decision, then criticism from her relatives will make her doubt herself more. She says that she is confident in her decision. In a year or two, she'll know better whether she's going to stay or leave.

You won’t kniw what it is truly like and how it affects your child until they enroll. Every grade will be different no matter which school or neighborhood you decide to live in. Choose the best option for your family that you can afford. That is more than a GS rating but also your commute and whatever else you decide is important. You may need to change schools or move later. Maybe you won’t.

I can’t speak to my family EVER about politics so we agree to never discuss that topic. You may need to take a break from them for a while then do the same.

Keep your decisions on a need to know basis and filter all the opinions. You are doing what you think is best. You can always change course later. Kids will be fine. You will be fine.

I think it helps both them and you if you lessen the stakes. You've made a decision for Kindergarten, not for the next 13 years. You're not going to all of a sudden stop being her parents and totally disengage in her education. If this school doesn't work, you'll move her.

I teach in a title 1 school with a low rating. We have a lot of needy kids. But, we have about 20% of our kids who are extremely high achieving (as in, they rival my own children). And we have about 30-40% who are right on level. So yes, we still have about half our students who are low, some extremely so, but at our school your kids would have academic peers and then some. Not all title 1 schools are full of the super low kids.

Fwiw, I'd send my own kids to the school I teach at in a heartbeat. We live in a different suburb, so that's not possible, but I'd do it if it was. The only way you can ever reallllllllly know what a school is like is to have a very close relationship with someone who teaches in the school. Parents have some idea, but it is the teachers who can really tell you....except they can't.

Anonymous wrote:My child will enroll in the Fall in a Title I school that has been identified as a "Priority School" by my state and is rated 1/10 on greatschools. My relatives are absolutely outraged about this and think I'm making my child into a "social experiment." I have thought long and hard about this choice and just ethically, logistically and financially I think it's the right one for my family. But I have my own anxiety about the school and hearing all this pushback from my family is making me doubt my choice. How do I remain confident in my decision? I've blocked the relatives from communicating with me for now. But the doubt still remains. I guess my question is will an otherwise engaged and happy 5 year old fare fine in any school or does rating really matter?

Just tell them you chose the school based on your ethics (?), family logistics and finances. Period.

Won't know until you try it, no matter what you pick or move.

I send my kids to a Title 1 school. And to tell you the truth- I constantly battle whether this is the right decision or not. But my kids- they are happy, have tons of friends, and are thriving academically.

Some of the best things that have helped me with some of my nagging doubts are talking with friends who send their children to so-called outstanding schools. To be honest, they are dealing with their own doubts and fears. I worry my child wont be sufficiently challenged academically... and that might not be their concern.... but trust me, they have something to worry about. I don't want to generalize, so I wont go into details, but I get the sense that no matter where you send your child to school you will deal with a unique set of issues, concerns, and fears based on that environment.

As parents, I think we will always wonder how the choices we make will impact our children, and whether they will "turn out ok." But at the end of the day, I think most of us want our kids to grow up to be happy, healthy, independent adults... living their best life. And I am confident that there are plenty of different ways to get that outcome.. including sending them to schools that are not highly rated.

1. My friends did this and decided to pull their kids out after a couple of years because even though the children were getting lots of attention at school, it couldn't make up for the fact that there was socio-economic disparity and that most of the children just were not supported academically and in other areas - so there wasn't a peer group at all.

THIS.

But, OP, it truly depends on whether or not there are any others there like your kid.

I taught in a Title I school many years ago. There was one child in my first grade class whose parents sent her because they truly had a giving and generous social philosophy. She was the only child whose parents had a college degree--and, I suspect that most of my kids came from families lacking a high school degree. Her parents were professionals: a journalist and a nurse. The child was lovely and got along with her peers--but academically and socially, she did not fit in. She got along, but the gap was too great.

At the end of the year, her mom came and told me they were moving to another school boundary. She shared her concerns. They did not move to an elite neighborhood, but to one that would provide a greater span of socio-economic kids. I told her that I thought she was doing the right thing. We had never had this discussion until then.

That does not mean this will be a poor fit for your child. I hope there are other kids there who are not so academically far behind him.

Have you visited the school and gotten a good feeling? Observed current teachers and students? Talked to current parents/students about their experience? I agree that great schools is not the greatest indicator. But, I don’t think you can put even the most flexible and happy child “anywhere”. Go based on your thoughts and observations, not assumptions relatives make based on stereotypes.

Anonymous wrote:They are taking it year by year but in the meantime will save money not doing private school and live walking distance from their schools. You just never know.

Yes, this is what I'm hoping to do. We have heard mixed things about the school but our child is a very engaged learner and I'm pretty sure we can get at least a few years out of public school before demographics become a problem. Plus there's no private schools convenient to us that I think are worth the cost.

The Great School rating does not matter--it's an indicator of the socioeconomics of the school more than anything else. But the conditions at the school do matter. We have schools rated 1 in our district that I would happily send my child to if only we could get in, and schools rated 1 that I would never consider having my child at. You will know fairly quickly which this is, and if need be, you can likely make a change in the fall if it really isn't working out. Is it a local neighborhood school? If so, you may well find other families testing it out too--find out whether there is a PTA in place already and join if there is, or start one if there isn't.

Also, it's kindergarten. If you really aren't happy with the teacher and school, supplement outside of school and make a change for first grade. But you may be pleasantly surprised, too. Two families we know who are finishing up kinder at "1" schools that they chose only because they didn't get in anywhere else in the lottery have decided to stay for first grade too after finding they really like the school communities. They are taking it year by year but in the meantime will save money not doing private school and live walking distance from their schools. You just never know.

Anonymous wrote:
1. My friends did this and decided to pull their kids out after a couple of years because even though the children were getting lots of attention at school, it couldn't make up for the fact that there was socio-economic disparity and that most of the children just were not supported academically and in other areas - so there wasn't a peer group at all.

2. Now you know that you must be careful what you share with your family and friends. They won't hesitate to tell you what's what and you don't like it. Come on DCUM instead, we'll perform the same service without the emotional and codependent baggage

thanks, I had tried to be deliberately vague about the name of the school but I slipped and greatschools is awful, etc. My DH and I are open to switching schools in a few years (and can open enroll in a slightly better one) but we just want to give this school a shot and boost our finances a bit.

I wish I could just be confident in how I'm raising my own children but families suck sometimes.

1. My friends did this and decided to pull their kids out after a couple of years because even though the children were getting lots of attention at school, it couldn't make up for the fact that there was socio-economic disparity and that most of the children just were not supported academically and in other areas - so there wasn't a peer group at all.

2. Now you know that you must be careful what you share with your family and friends. They won't hesitate to tell you what's what and you don't like it. Come on DCUM instead, we'll perform the same service without the emotional and codependent baggage

My child will enroll in the Fall in a Title I school that has been identified as a "Priority School" by my state and is rated 1/10 on greatschools. My relatives are absolutely outraged about this and think I'm making my child into a "social experiment." I have thought long and hard about this choice and just ethically, logistically and financially I think it's the right one for my family. But I have my own anxiety about the school and hearing all this pushback from my family is making me doubt my choice. How do I remain confident in my decision? I've blocked the relatives from communicating with me for now. But the doubt still remains. I guess my question is will an otherwise engaged and happy 5 year old fare fine in any school or does rating really matter?