Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 20:40     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
A weekend dedicated entirely to what HE likes. Not what you think he likes, or what you want him to like, or what he should like, but what HE likes.

Craft beer festival?, done.
Chili cookoff?, done.
Tailgating for Team A?, done.
Museum of wax figurines?, done.
All Civil War battlefields from 1863?, done.

And a great, all-out massage.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 20:29     Subject: Re:To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Anonymous wrote:
To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are.


No, no, no, men don't care about that shit.

Initiate sex yourself. Enthusiastically accept when he initiates.


+1 We don't have a frickin "love language."
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 20:06     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
I think my DH wants nothing but touch. touch. touch.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 20:01     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Cook tasty meals.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:52     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:to show my man that I regret being a moody wench for the past year (while I was dealing with major health issues and being ungrateful while balancing our kids) now that I can exhale and see just how lucky I am. Yes, frequent sex and all the extra trappings. I know that part. Got that down. I am in good shape, so we are ok there too. I am looking for other ways. What really makes you feel awesome from your wife? What do you wish she would do (other than the sex arena) that she does not do currently or often enough? Want to be a bit more creative. He deserves it.



To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are. If you aren't speaking his language he'll miss the message. I would say that you should voice those things to him several times in several ways over a couple weeks' time, but words of affirmation is my love language, so that why I would suggest that. It may not be his.

https://365tests.com/personality-tests/what-is-your-love-language/

Forget all that pop-psych crap. Just be nicer and have sex. Also, don't make excuses for being bitchy (like saying that you were dealing with major health issues and balancing the kids). He already knows your challenges...bring it up just sounds like justification. I'm sure he knows a lot of other wives that have been through more than you and were not moody wenches.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:52     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
in addition to the sex, respect and admire him as a person.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:46     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:to show my man that I regret being a moody wench for the past year (while I was dealing with major health issues and being ungrateful while balancing our kids) now that I can exhale and see just how lucky I am. Yes, frequent sex and all the extra trappings. I know that part. Got that down. I am in good shape, so we are ok there too. I am looking for other ways. What really makes you feel awesome from your wife? What do you wish she would do (other than the sex arena) that she does not do currently or often enough? Want to be a bit more creative. He deserves it.



To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are. If you aren't speaking his language he'll miss the message. I would say that you should voice those things to him several times in several ways over a couple weeks' time, but words of affirmation is my love language, so that why I would suggest that. It may not be his.

https://365tests.com/personality-tests/what-is-your-love-language/


I can in here to post this. I am a words and physical touch person and my spouse is a quality time and acts of service person. Spouse is routinely frustrated because my words of praise to them are insignificant and if I really meant it, then I would dedicate the time to the acts of service they are seeking.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:46     Subject: Re:To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Anonymous wrote:
To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are.


No, no, no, men don't care about that shit.

Initiate sex yourself. Enthusiastically accept when he initiates.


They do. The top two love languages for men (I'll say they are the top two for 95% of men, and I'm making that statistic up, but go ahead and google it) are physical touch (sex) and time spent together (forplay).

gentry
Post 05/30/2018 19:44     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Just go all in on sex/sex related. But beyond that just be genuinely kind and interested in him and your relationship. Don’t overcompensate and smother him unless he likes that.

Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:39     Subject: Re:To the Men out there.... What can I do...
To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are.


No, no, no, men don't care about that shit.

Initiate sex yourself. Enthusiastically accept when he initiates.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 19:37     Subject: Re:To the Men out there.... What can I do...
OP has already done two wonderful things: self-reflected on herself over the last year and acknowledged that he likes sex and wants to feel connected in that way.

I'd suggest a few other things to think about in terms of reconnecting the relationship. Say what you said here. Tell him you appreciate him sticking with you. Ask him what would be a nice way to reconnect and show your appreciation. Listen to what he says.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 18:11     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Anonymous wrote:to show my man that I regret being a moody wench for the past year (while I was dealing with major health issues and being ungrateful while balancing our kids) now that I can exhale and see just how lucky I am. Yes, frequent sex and all the extra trappings. I know that part. Got that down. I am in good shape, so we are ok there too. I am looking for other ways. What really makes you feel awesome from your wife? What do you wish she would do (other than the sex arena) that she does not do currently or often enough? Want to be a bit more creative. He deserves it.



To answer this first, you need to know what his top 2 love languages are. If you aren't speaking his language he'll miss the message. I would say that you should voice those things to him several times in several ways over a couple weeks' time, but words of affirmation is my love language, so that why I would suggest that. It may not be his.

https://365tests.com/personality-tests/what-is-your-love-language/
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 18:09     Subject: Re:To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Start by telling him what you just told us! Then invite him to go away for a few days centered around stuff he likes to do. And make sure the sex is great - start by not climbing into bed with a tee shirt and boxers.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 18:09     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
Woman here, so I got nothing for you, just to say, congrats on recognizing your moody wenchiness, and doing something about it. Nice job. That's HARD.
Anonymous
Post 05/30/2018 18:05     Subject: To the Men out there.... What can I do...
to show my man that I regret being a moody wench for the past year (while I was dealing with major health issues and being ungrateful while balancing our kids) now that I can exhale and see just how lucky I am. Yes, frequent sex and all the extra trappings. I know that part. Got that down. I am in good shape, so we are ok there too. I am looking for other ways. What really makes you feel awesome from your wife? What do you wish she would do (other than the sex arena) that she does not do currently or often enough? Want to be a bit more creative. He deserves it.