Anonymous wrote:It's normal in my culture.

Arab?

Anonymous wrote:Am one of them. Think nothing of it. Wonder a little about the women who change their names, though.

I hope you don’t pull a muscle patting yourself on the back.

Anonymous wrote:You must be new here.

This. There have been a couple of threads over the last couple of years that indicate most women don't take their husband's last name anymore, at least in the DC area. Other people get divorced and the DW doesn't change her last name back for whatever reason. There have been threads on that here, too. Like the one where they got divorced and he got remarried, his new wife took his last name, and the ex-wife kept his last name.

I am in the middle of a divorce. We separated 5 years ago. I will have changed my name a total of 3 times since marrying this jerk. He is really good at manipulating people. I see it all for what it was now. But I love my maiden last name and would never change it for another man. Now my daughter and I will have different last names. I don't care. She'll eventually be old enough (way past adulthood) when I tell her why when the question comes up.

What's wrong with keeping your name? My wife does and I see nothing wrong with it. (Asian here)

He's a putz and she will cheat on him.

That they made a personal choice that has no other effect.

My wife is on marriage #2. When we got married, she still had the surname of her first husband. I told her she could change to my name, change back to her maiden name, or make up a new name. The only option I asked her not to choose was to keep her first husband's name. Note that I would have married her anyway had she chosen to keep that name (she had it for 14 years, and had some good professional reasons to want to keep it), but I was happier that she chose not to. She opted for my name so that we would all share a family name when we had kids, but it was totally her choice and I would have had no problems accepting her regardless of the name.

I am more judgmental of archaic people who are bothered when a woman chooses not to take her husband's surname than I am by the women who choose not to.

Anonymous wrote:Am one of them. Think nothing of it. Wonder a little about the women who change their names, though.

op here. agreed. i kept my name.

I think good for her for not being pressured into changing her name.

That they are smart. I’ve been married almost 4 years and *still* have problems from the name change. At my brand new job, I ended up with my maiden name on some things and my married name on others. So now every time I need to do paperwork I have to figure out what name they need on it, people have trouble looking me up in databases because they know me by a different name, and I have to explain over and over again why my security badge has the “wrong” name on it.

It's normal in my culture.

Anonymous wrote:You must be new here.

+1

Very common among educated couples these days.

I think its normal as I did it. Children have both names. They can figure it out when they marry or have kids.

You must be new here.

Am one of them. Think nothing of it. Wonder a little about the women who change their names, though.

what do you think of married couples (with children) who go by different last names? just your first impression. or do you think nothing of it?