Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well guess what. They do.

Well, it is illegal to discriminate based on familial status - it is prohibited by federal law. Anyone who is stupid enough to ask that question is opening themselves, and their company, up for a discrimination case if the person isn’t hired.

It's illegal, just like paying women less money is illegal, but employers know that it would be next to impossible get sued for it. It's too hard to prove and so most lawyers don't want to take it on. That's reality in 2018.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well guess what. They do.

I have been asked if I have kids in several interviews - in each case I didn't get the job (yes I am a parent).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well guess what. They do.

Well, it is illegal to discriminate based on familial status - it is prohibited by federal law. Anyone who is stupid enough to ask that question is opening themselves, and their company, up for a discrimination case if the person isn’t hired.

Tatoos

I am a fed manager who works in an office. If your tattoo shows, I judge. Cover it up or don't have one at all. And don't ever let me see the one on your boob, even after you get the job.



And yes I did tell that to a female employee. Tattoo sowing on your boob is never appropriate at work unless you work with Stormy Daniels.

Anonymous wrote:I never really care about distance. My office is in Tyson’s and we have employees from WV, Stephens City, VA, and Annapolis, MD. I only let it Factor in when they come into the interview with lots of special requests about their start and end time and/or have issues with our 9-3 core hours.

If this is a 9 to 5 job for which they need to be in the office every day, they will be dependent on the weather and traffic situation, no matter how hardy they want to appear. Train commute in NYC or SF (or Metro here) is different, because the trains run more or less on schedule. It's also not as hard as driving for the same length of time, esp. in bad weather, in the dark or against sun glare.

About the kids... I just assume that all applicants in their 30s and 40s either have or will have kids. Doesn't matter if they disclose or not.

I have 2 employees with a long commute and 3 kids each. In one case the employee's spouse is the default backup in case kids are sick, school closings etc. The employee takes sick days, but within a reasonable limit and has enough PTO left over to actually take vacation. The other employee is the default stay-with-the-kids and I don't know how much their spouse participates if at all. This one uses PTO faster than it accumulates, calls out all the time, is exhausted and is often behind with their work.

I am a parent and a commuter myself and I understand, I really do. But if I need consistent daily coverage in the office and the candidate assures me that their commute of 1.5 hours one way will not affect their attendance one bit, I am skeptical and it's absolutely not personal or judgy. Just good old BTDT.

I never really care about distance. My office is in Tyson’s and we have employees from WV, Stephens City, VA, and Annapolis, MD. I only let it Factor in when they come into the interview with lots of special requests about their start and end time and/or have issues with our 9-3 core hours.

Also, 9 times out of 10 when you ask an interviewee to tell us something about themselves, they bring up their kids. People need to work on that!

Anonymous wrote:There is no reason to put your address on your resume anymore. And no need to mention kids. You interviewed with a friend who said that? That sounds made up.

Cover letters.

There is no reason to put your address on your resume anymore. And no need to mention kids. You interviewed with a friend who said that? That sounds made up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well guess what. They do.

These employers are clueless and are setting themselves up for potential lawsuits.
Your age, your kids, your family and so on cannot be used to base a hiring decision.
You do not have to disclose your private life.

Don't put your address on your resume. While I shouldn't factor that in, I do wonder if the applicant is going to have commute issues.

I also wouldn't volunteer anything about your family life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well guess what. They do.

Anonymous wrote:Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

Hiring manager here. I agree with this. Different people have different thresholds as far as commutes go; you cannot assume anything here.

And I am confused as to why kids come up at all. Employers can’t ask, so why disclose this?

Well, I have worked in NYC and had people commuting to work from Nassau and Suffolk, and worked in SF and had people commuting from Livermore. So I don't worry about distance.

And I don't know why you'd be talking about your kids so much that you're mentioning their ages. Stop doing that. Maybe you talk to much about your private life in an interview and THAT is the problem.

I do pay attention to that, and if the house is more than say 20 miles from the location I would be concerned that the person has a long commute.

Also, having kids myself, I try not to reveal that I do until I feel comfortable in the process i.e. when I’m fairly certain I’m going to get an offer. I personally feel like I wouldn’t want to work in a place that didn’t accept the fact that I had kids, because they’re such a part of my life. But that may limit some of the jobs that I get.

Other things I judge: strong scents and smells from the applicant or poor grooming in general, a resume longer than 2 pages or poorly designed, and writing in any email communications with me during the hiring process.

Also, if they talk too much or too little during the interview.

I'm continuing to get a vibe (twice in the past 2 interviews) when the hiring manager notes my house is roughly 23 miles from their location. How much bias or thought do you give to something of this nature?

The second issue is children. I recently interviewed with a good friend and we had a decent conversation. But I feel sensitive letting them know I have a 9, 5, and 3 yr. old, and feel like I'm getting the "this guy has his hands full and may be more trouble than he's worth" vibe.

She actually said what I've bolded.

How much am I overthinking vs. being on to something here...Am I supposed to be single and live across the street to get hired these days?