DCUM Forum

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:08 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Grab someone you know in your office and repeat out loud the sentence you just typed, do you really think it sounds right?

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:08 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Me too. I like going out and spending time with my friends. If it was a non birthday organized group dinner I am always prepared to pay for myself. When it's someones birthday, I just assume that each person pays for their meal and our collective gift to the birthday person is to pay for their meal too.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:08 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Oh go back to your country club, Kitty. Buffy is waiting for you at your usual table.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:07 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

I've lived in Europe also and I noticed in Europe the host always pays, whereas in the US the others pay for the host.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:07 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Your question is actually very low class to me. I will answer it though. We are top 1% income and educated.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:07 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Same in my circle of friends and no one has an issue with it. However, the birthday person is never actually the one to plan the party/dinner, it's always another person in the friend group. Since it's usually the same people volunteering to do the planning each time (which my introverted self is so thankful for), it's not fair that they get penalized by having to pay for everyone's dinners. After all, if they didn't do the planning, we'd all never see each other!

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:05 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

I am really sorry but this sounds very low class to me. Is this a race or class thing?

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:04 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

I agree that this is normal in my group, which is why I never ask people to go out to dinner with me and my DH for our birthdays. I'd rather host and pay, or not at all.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:03 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Yup!

Birthday party on a boat. . . only to receive an updated invite telling us how much the boat would be per person. Oh, but the positive is it's BYOB. Huh?

Even with holidays, I always ask if I can bring something. The last time I asked, the response was lamb, cheese & charcuturie, and couple bottles of wine. Guess it was my mistake for asking!

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:03 Subject: Re:Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Your examples are kind of weak

1) Was it planned by the birthday person? My friends do this FOR a friend and get in on it together to pay for the birthday person. If you don't want to do this just don't come
2) I don't understand this one
3) See #1, this is something you're kind of doing FOR the bride.
4) Just don't go. People can have their weddings wherever they want. If they don't give you crap about not coming then get over it and just don't go.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 12:01 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Same here. If I'm invited to a restaurant for a birthday with a group (not just like us an another couple), I assume everyone pays their own way and chips in for the birthday person.

Then again, I don't get invited out a lot, so it's not a big dent in my overall annual spending.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 11:59 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

This is standard to pay for your meal and split the birthday person's meal in my social circle. I am happy to be included and have no issue paying for my meal plus the birthday celebrants.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 11:56 Subject: Re:Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

- I've gone to birthday celebrations where its assumed the 'guest of honor' will be comped a $200+ meal by the celebrants. Surprise!
- I've had invitations to parties where the guest of honor reserved a portion of the festivities for the table - to the tune of $50 each.
- I've been asked to pay for bachelorette festivities also.
- One friend wanted to me pay $5,000 to attend her Fiji wedding.

It never ends. I've become better at declining as well. Either have parties within your means OR be prepared to pay for the celebration yourself.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 11:56 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

This has never happened to me. We and our friends have had birthday dinners or cocktail hours before, but the host always pays for everyone. If you want to invite people to celebrate at a restaurant with you, you pay. If you want to have a birthday dinner for a friend, you pay. If you can't afford it, you celebrate some other way. I've never been to a party where guests were expected to pay for anything, and I wouldn't attend if it was.

Anonymous

02/06/2018 11:50 Subject: Charging guests to attend parties? Is that a thing?

Never happened to me. Maybe I don't get invited to enough events. LOL.

"I’m standing up for all guests who are tired of this trend. Call it my #guestsdontpay protest."

From Washington Post:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/get-there/wp/2018/01/30/stop-charging-me-to-attend-your-celebrations-guestsdontpay/