Anonymous wrote:Why is it that when a brown girl marries a white guy, other brown people get offended?

Why is it that when a black man marries a white girl, other black people are angry?

What is it about marrying white that offends other POC?

Speaking as a black woman married to a white man, our worst and most persistent detractors are white women.

You're not supposed to marry outside your race, your nationality.. Duh.

It's a territorial thing.

I'm not a POC (and thus will defer to POC on this if they disagree with me), but here's what I've gleaned from reading/listening/learning.

One issue is the legacy of racism and what it means to succeed, in that for a long time so much of success for a POC is the extent to which they are accepted by and integrated into white society. In the eyes of some POC, a POC (especially an affluent/successful POC) marrying a white person can be seen as perpetuating this notion that the goal of POC is to integrate into white society (via marriage) rather than succeed in their own skin.

Another issue is what it does to communities, which still tend to be highly segregated by race. When a POC marries a white person, if they are successful/affluent enough to do so, they tend to move to a whiter/more affluent community rather than staying in a less affluent community with a higher concentration of POC (this happens with POC couples as well, but at a lesser rate than white/POC couples). One effect of this is to remove from the community exactly the kind of people who would be in the best position to invest (not just financially but also with time/effort) in the community and help improve it. Another is that the kinds of people you'd like to have in your community as role models for kids tend not to stick around, and it's a lot harder for young kids trying to find their way out of a cycle of poverty to find an example they know personally of someone who looks like them who has been successful, who's broken the cycle, and who might be able to guide them a bit as they grow up.

Also, the rates of mixed-race marriages tends not to be balanced across the genders. Black men are more likely to marry white women than black women are to marry white men; it's the reverse for hispanic and asian communities. Whatever the reason for that (and there are plenty of factors we could discuss) the end result is that, for instance, black women tend to have a harder time finding a husband/long-term partner, especially one who will contribute positively to a family (both financially and emotionally), when a disproportionate number of black men (especially black men who are more likely to be financially stable and involved partners/parents) are marrying white women, and there's not a commensurate group of white men who would provide the same looking to marry black women.

Black men do not like it because they feel that white men have every other advantage in life, why do they get to have "our" women too.

Anonymous wrote:Why is it that when a brown girl marries a white guy, other brown people get offended?

Why is it that when a black man marries a white girl, other black people are angry?

What is it about marrying white that offends other POC?

There is no shortage of idiots that get upset over nonsense, even nonsense that isn't any of their business.

Some people get offended (regardless of race) some people don't. Why do you care? Live your life.

- Brown woman married to a white man

Some people get offended (regardless of race) some people don't. Why do you care? Live your life.

- Brown woman married to a white man

I rarely see white people getting resentful about mixed couples these days. I'm my experience, white people are the most laid back about it.

My parents are "mixed race" and never experienced any grief from that particular POC group. They experienced some grief from whites but fairly minimal and a long time ago.

I smile at every interracial couple I see. You can't force people to like it, but you can show the couple involved that you support it.

Watch the movie Save the Last Dance. It will answer all your questions about race and relationships.

I am white & married a SE Asian man and literally no SE Asian people are remotely put off. And, sort of strangely to my mind, black women always smile at us especially our kids.

It's not just the POC, there are white people who are also resentful.

-a white woman married to a black man

Insecurities.

Why is it that when a brown girl marries a white guy, other brown people get offended?

Why is it that when a black man marries a white girl, other black people are angry?

What is it about marrying white that offends other POC?