OP here - thanks so much for all the responses. It is so great to hear that others have dealt with this successfully.

Again, I'm quite positive thyroid is not an issue. I have no health issues that I know of, all my labs were normal at my last checkup this summer. I haven't been excessively tired, particularly since quitting coffee.

Re exercise 5x/week, it's hard to find the time, but I may try to just walk to the metro on the days I don't work out at the gym. I have been working out more than I ever did before (incorporating weights is totally new to me - I used to swim and occasionally run), but it isn't daily.

What about dairy? I have been reading about insulin resistance / LCHF and it seems like dairy is OK? I had almost cut it out in recent months.

Also, what about beans? I have always leaned veggie and eaten a lot of beans to make up for the protein. But it seems like a lot of people classify beans as carbs. Are there beans that are less carb-y than others?

I don't think I can stick to a strict diet, but I think I can take out sugar, bread, and pasta, since it seems like others my age have had success with this.

Add good fats (Greek yogurt avocado etc), protein veggies. Cut down in sugar and refined carbs. Eat them with fat/protein when you do. Eat real and filling meals, but don't snack. Try to eat with an 8 hour window. Add some weight lifting. Get your probiotics. Drink your water.

I'm 47. I gained weight 2 years ago, all midsection, with no change in habits. Slowly dropped it doing the above.i still eat desserts and carbs, but less. I used to graze, now I often just have 2 meals, either with or without a lighter meal/snack.

I'm not a doctor, and so I do think you need to get your hormones/thyroid checked.

However, I'm around your age and I need to work out a lot more than two times a week. Finding a sport or activity you like enough to enjoy at least five days a week would be a more enjoyable approach than giving up your occasional sweets: I run hard almost every day in part because it allows me to eat pasta without gaining weight, plus makes me feel and look good. Most of my friends who also remained at a normal weight into our late 30s rely on starvation and trendy fasts, but I just don't have that kind of willpower. Plus, running makes you feel great. Just my thoughts.

I went dairy and gluten free and lost 15 pounds seemingly overnight. It’s been a year and I’m still down the weight, at 115, 5’6”. I’m 43.

At 40, I kept telling myself it was normal to be gaining weight. I was probably eating more and blaming it on my age since you always hear that 40 is a big turning point. I also think I got used to how I ate when I was pregnant/breastfeeding and never really went back to my normal diet.

However if you feel like something is off, tell your doctor.

Middle aged spread. Your metabolism slows majorly at 40.

Anonymous wrote:get your thyroid checked

This.

PP hit the nail on the head. Also look up Obesity Code by Dr. Jason Fung.

New poster adding onto a PP — I can say that cutting carbs reversed my own weight gain. I wasn’t eating fewer calories as I lost, so it almost felt like magic. I also would recommend a book by Taubes - Good Calories Bad Calories. It’s much denser than the one recommended above, but delves deeply into the science, which I found reassuring when I’d initially feared that consuming so much saturated fat was going to make me into a cardiac patient, haha.

Add in the fact that yet another study has now connnected Alzheimer’s to insulin, and I think I’ll be eating this way for the foreseeable future, even though I’m at goal again.

Where did you get 1900 calories? Figure out your maintenance calories here- https://tdeecalculator.net

If you want to lose weight, eat less.

OP here, thank you so much PP, this is fascinating. I will order the Taubes book. This really resonates because I feel this sense of shame - like, suddenly I'm greedy and eating too much, when I'm not eating differently than I had before! And I'm trying to be body positive, but it's hard.

On the other hand, I know that cutting sugar would be good. It will be hard to cut carbs (pasta and bread especially) but I will try and see what happens.

To the earlier PP above, my thyroid levels were normal - I can't remember them right now, but I looked up the actual numbers and they ruled out hypothyroidism.

PP above...just a ant to clarify the point a little the original menopausal mice. The researchers concluded that menopause causes overeating which causes obesity. But the truth is the OPPOSITE! The mice overate because they needed more food! They needed more food because their bodies were taking calories and storing them rather than letting them burn.

Menopausal women don't overeat because they are gluttons all of a sudden. If they get fat and overeat, they overeat because they have less energy and need more food! It's a vicious cycle, though, because if they overeat a Hugh carb diet, they are storing more and more fat and raising insulin higher and higher, storing more fat, and on and on.

Fat causes the urge to overeat. Overeating carbs raises insulin and causes even more calories to be fmdivertes to fat, which causes more hunger.

i actually cried when I read this chapter. Then got mad. Then got 50 pounds slimmer, seriously. With not a lot of effort compared to all the calorie restriction and exercise and self-recrimination I had previously tried and failed.

It is insulin resistance. It is getting worse as you are entering into perimenopause. Estrogen blocks insulin's fat storage effects. But as your estrogen decreases, and takes a nosedive after menopause, your baseline insulin levels go higher and higher, so even though you are eating the same, more of those calories are being stored as fat rather than burned as energy. You are probably more tired and hungry, too, right? That's because you have less energy to burn. Insulin is stealing that sugar and storing it as fat. Increased abdominal fat is one symptom of insulin resistance, but you may start to see many others crop up in the next few years...your triglycerides may spike, inflammatory markers go up, blood pressure goes up, weight gain. It's NOT the calories. It's hormones.

The key is to lower your baseline insulin. Two ways to do this: eat a low-carb, high fat diet (LCHF) and/or fast, intermittent fasting or periodic fasting.

The book "Why We Get Fat And What's To Do About It" by Gary Taubes was a huge eye opener for me. One chapter talks about bad science around menopause and weight gain, and how women are shamed and told that they need to eat less and move more when that's not what their body needs at all...lots of women eat less and less and move more and more and still get fatter and are tired and hangry to boot!

Scientists did a study on mice to see why they got fat after menopause. They surgically induced menopause in mice and found that the menopausal mice all became obese. They all are significantly more calories than control group mice not in menopause. Their insulin was way, way higher than control group mice even those they ate the same food and had similar levels pre-menopause. So researchers concluded that menopause causes obesity because lowered estrogen raises insulin and makes the mice overat which causes them to get fat. So the answer is to tell the mice not to overeat. Right?

WRONG. Taubes cited a good scientist who questioned that bad conclusion and repeated the exact experiment but with one change...he didn't ALLOW the menopausal mice to overeat. They got the exact same amounts of food as the premenopausal mice. And guess what?

The menopausal mice got JUST as fat with strict calorie control as they got eating as much as they wanted. They got JUST AS FAT! The only difference is that their metabolisms dropped significantly. They were hungrier and more sedentary. Their bodies slowed down to account for having less energy to burn. They had less energy to burn, even though they were eating the exact same # of calories as the premenopausal mice...because their hormones were telling their bodies to store more energy as fat!

So if anyone tells you just to cut your calories, don't. If you don't address the hormones, low cal won't make you less fat. It will just make you hungrier and more sedentary and exhausted.

Lower your insulin. Drastically reduce carbs and eliminate sugars. If you like science, it all makes sense.

Write down every thing you eat for the next week
If you aren't overeating, go see your doctor.

get your thyroid checked

I am confused, and wondering what to do.

I'm 39, and my youngest is 3.5. Prior to pregnancy I was generally slim - 5'8 and around 135/140. I had two kids, and gained 25-35 lbs with each pregnancy, then lost all the weight in each kid's second year (and in fact went down to my lowest weight, 135).

In the last 9 months - since my youngest fully weaned at 2.5 - I have begun steadily gaining weight, especially around my midsection. Sometimes I look like I did when I was 5 months pregnant! I don't weigh myself daily, but I was up to 150 the last time I checked. I feel heavy and can't fit into my clothes, or at least, they all fit differently. I work out at least 2x/week (weights and some cardio), although I could definitely get more exercise (I don't walk enough).

In the past I have not generally dieted, but I eat well - I cook my own food, lots of fresh and cooked veggies, some meat, whole grains. However, I've always had a sweet tooth, and eat something sweet most days, even if it's not a ton of sweets. I realize I probably need to make some changes now, but I'm not even sure where to start. I've been tracking calories for the past month or so, and I generally eat around 1900/day. I cut out coffee and alcohol a few months ago because I've been getting bad headaches.

So what's next? Sugar? Carbs? And why would I have started to gain weight in this way? Is it just age - is this what happens at/around 39? I did get my thyroid levels checked recently, and they were fine, so I don't think it's that.

Any thoughts or suggestions appreciated. I feel like I'm losing control of my body, or like I don't even know my own body any more...