Did you try in-house? They should pay better than the small firm you applied.

I don’t want to go back to my firm tomorrow either, OP! Does anyone like going back to work after vacation? Probably not. Grin and bear it and look for the a better fit.

OP, it's ok to feel down for a few minutes, but then you need to come up with a plan so that you can quit your current job. Sit down and figure out how much you need to live on, and how much you can start saving now. Can you extend the payment period on your loans to reduce monthly payments?* Giving up Starbucks is not real savings but are there spendy things you habitually do (therapeutic shopping, for example) that you can cut? Is some of your misery pregnancy related, and likely to pass? Be real about your situation so that you can find a solution. Having a plan will make you feel better immediately.

Everybody who has left BigLaw for lifestyle reasons has taken a pay cut. Most of us are not living in poverty: we own homes and and go on vacation and put children in daycare / private school. You have had your current salary less than 5 years, that is not handcuffs.

*Please nobody yell at me about extending the loan. Yes, it will cost more in the long run. Seeing your kids, and not being miserable, is worth it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:get a job in the federal government like every other mom lawyer does.

*used to do. Like two people have left from gov from my firm this year, and it's generally considered to be a major bigfed pipeline firm. I stay on top of USAJobs and it is damn slim pickings.

*for gov nor from gov

Anonymous wrote:get a job in the federal government like every other mom lawyer does.

*used to do. Like two people have left from gov from my firm this year, and it's generally considered to be a major bigfed pipeline firm. I stay on top of USAJobs and it is damn slim pickings.

get a job in the federal government like every other mom lawyer does.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are your golden handcuffed? Did you buy an expensive house with a big mortgage?

$500k, whether that's "expensive" or "a big mortgage" is in the eye of the beholder. Childcare costs, student loans are the other sources of feeling handcuffed.

That’s cheap! Assume you are in DC? Good job there - at least you didn’t go crazy like some biglaw associates. That will give you some flexibility to accept a lower salary.

Commute to DC anyway. Some of the sense of golden handcuffs are in my imagination I think, but childcare and loans are real obstacles, and because we had kids before I even started in law, there was no golden window to aggressively pay down loans.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How are your golden handcuffed? Did you buy an expensive house with a big mortgage?

$500k, whether that's "expensive" or "a big mortgage" is in the eye of the beholder. Childcare costs, student loans are the other sources of feeling handcuffed.

That’s cheap! Assume you are in DC? Good job there - at least you didn’t go crazy like some biglaw associates. That will give you some flexibility to accept a lower salary.

Anonymous wrote:How are your golden handcuffed? Did you buy an expensive house with a big mortgage?

$500k, whether that's "expensive" or "a big mortgage" is in the eye of the beholder. Childcare costs, student loans are the other sources of feeling handcuffed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been applying to smaller firms where I think I'd be happier but haven't gotten an offer in the range of what I could accept. I'm deeply dreading going back tomorrow. I hate my firm, it's a terrible fit. I didn't come close to hours last year, so I am sure the dissatisfaction is mutual. Also, I'm pregnant, so it's not a great time for job hunting. Would really appreciate some words of wisdom.

I’m another pregnant associate struggling with hours — can you share what you billed and what the firm’s target was?

TBH I don't even know. Probably around 1000-1200. 1800 is required to be an "associate in good standing" but the average associate last year only billed 1600 so they clearly do nothing when someone isn't in "good standing."

How are your golden handcuffed? Did you buy an expensive house with a big mortgage?

Anonymous wrote:I've been applying to smaller firms where I think I'd be happier but haven't gotten an offer in the range of what I could accept. I'm deeply dreading going back tomorrow. I hate my firm, it's a terrible fit. I didn't come close to hours last year, so I am sure the dissatisfaction is mutual. Also, I'm pregnant, so it's not a great time for job hunting. Would really appreciate some words of wisdom.

I’m another pregnant associate struggling with hours — can you share what you billed and what the firm’s target was?

Anonymous wrote:What does "in the range I could accept" mean?

Big law pays what it pays because it's miserable. They're basically paying you for the pain.

Smaller firms will not pay for a big law lifestyle, but on the flip side, you'll be able to enjoy whatever house you can afford.

The one small firm offer I got was 1/3 my 4th year salary (including bonus for them, not including biglaw bonus).

I agree they pay for the misery. God knows I have very few real skills.

What does "in the range I could accept" mean?

Big law pays what it pays because it's miserable. They're basically paying you for the pain.

Smaller firms will not pay for a big law lifestyle, but on the flip side, you'll be able to enjoy whatever house you can afford.

I've been applying to smaller firms where I think I'd be happier but haven't gotten an offer in the range of what I could accept. I'm deeply dreading going back tomorrow. I hate my firm, it's a terrible fit. I didn't come close to hours last year, so I am sure the dissatisfaction is mutual. Also, I'm pregnant, so it's not a great time for job hunting. Would really appreciate some words of wisdom.