Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is applying to 4 schools he really likes, including one that I think is not going to be academically challenging enough. He’s also applying to 1 school that I like but he doesn’t. All 5 are somewhat to very competitive. Should he also apply to 1-2 backup schools? If he ends up accepted at a backup and waitlisted at one or more of the schools he really likes, how difficult would it be to switch later? Along that line, does the waitlist just mean for that year and you reapply the next year? Or are you on the waitlist for multiple years? If you have to reapply every year, how does that work if you need recs etc from the backup school you’re attending? If you still don’t get into your preferred school, have you hurt your standing at the backup you’re attending? Or do you just accept that if you only get into the backup that that’s where you’re going til the end?

Always, always, always apply to backups. This is true for applications to schools for all academic levels - lower school through and including graduate school. I remember the tears flowing from my high school classmates at my very competitive high school in northern Virginia when their parents had selected only the most competitive colleges for their kids to apply to, with no real backups. And they didn't get into any college. Not a single one. In this area, with so many talented kids competing for spots, always, always, always have a backup plan. You won't regret it. You'll also find that, in some instances, those schools you thought were a backup end up being a wonderful place for your kid and they end up being happy there. I applied this philosophy to our kids, when we were applying for private schools for them. Even though we ended up applying to a lot of schools, which was certainly a lot of work for us, it reduced the stress on the kids considerably. They knew they'd go to some school where they'd be happy, so no pressure to get into "the one."

I agree with this advice, but seriously, you knew kids who got into no colleges? That is really awful.

This is drama. Plenty of colleges would have opening after everything shakes out. Worse scenario you go to community college for two years and move on to UVA

Yes, it absolutely was drama. My classmate was extremely upset about it, and it was the talk of my graduating class. I suspect her parents did recommended that she apply late to Northern Virginia Community College, which is an amazing community college, but that's a tough reality to face when you're 18 and you had visions of other schools, living in a dorm, etc. My point is that this drama could have been avoided with careful planning in the application process. Apply to backups where the kid will be happy so you're not shut out in April and doing a desperation search (and unlikely to get financial aid).

With respect to the K-12 private school search, you don't have to GO to the backup school, mind you. What I'm advising is that you apply to backups, then if for some reason you don't get in elsewhere you have a private school option for a place you think your kid may be happy. In some instances, the public may win out. But for those where the public is not an option, or there are other reasons for which you feel your child needs a smaller private school setting, you have a place your kid can go where she would be happy.

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the advice to apply to multiple safety (backup) schools, on top of 5 choice independents, unless your public option is a nonstarter.

Once you get down into the back bench independent schools, they're not worth $40k and more to the point, not better academically than your local public. At that point, you're really just saying "hey! Private at any cost!" Which is understandable if your local high school is Dunbar. But sending a kid to Bullis over Walter Johnson (because gds, sta, sidwell and maret said "no") is questionable.

This.

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the advice to apply to multiple safety (backup) schools, on top of 5 choice independents, unless your public option is a nonstarter.

Once you get down into the back bench independent schools, they're not worth $40k and more to the point, not better academically than your local public. At that point, you're really just saying "hey! Private at any cost!" Which is understandable if your local high school is Dunbar. But sending a kid to Bullis over Walter Johnson (because gds, sta, sidwell and maret said "no") is questionable.

Some people would prefer their child to be in a smaller setting, with uniforms, etc. Bullis does have excellent programs, and one would hope almost universally motivated students, so yes, there are many families who see it as preferable to WJ or any public. The bashing gets old, and my child doesn't even go there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is applying to 4 schools he really likes, including one that I think is not going to be academically challenging enough. He’s also applying to 1 school that I like but he doesn’t. All 5 are somewhat to very competitive. Should he also apply to 1-2 backup schools? If he ends up accepted at a backup and waitlisted at one or more of the schools he really likes, how difficult would it be to switch later? Along that line, does the waitlist just mean for that year and you reapply the next year? Or are you on the waitlist for multiple years? If you have to reapply every year, how does that work if you need recs etc from the backup school you’re attending? If you still don’t get into your preferred school, have you hurt your standing at the backup you’re attending? Or do you just accept that if you only get into the backup that that’s where you’re going til the end?

Always, always, always apply to backups. This is true for applications to schools for all academic levels - lower school through and including graduate school. I remember the tears flowing from my high school classmates at my very competitive high school in northern Virginia when their parents had selected only the most competitive colleges for their kids to apply to, with no real backups. And they didn't get into any college. Not a single one. In this area, with so many talented kids competing for spots, always, always, always have a backup plan. You won't regret it. You'll also find that, in some instances, those schools you thought were a backup end up being a wonderful place for your kid and they end up being happy there. I applied this philosophy to our kids, when we were applying for private schools for them. Even though we ended up applying to a lot of schools, which was certainly a lot of work for us, it reduced the stress on the kids considerably. They knew they'd go to some school where they'd be happy, so no pressure to get into "the one."

I agree with this advice, but seriously, you knew kids who got into no colleges? That is really awful.

This is drama. Plenty of colleges would have opening after everything shakes out. Worse scenario you go to community college for two years and move on to UVA

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the advice to apply to multiple safety (backup) schools, on top of 5 choice independents, unless your public option is a nonstarter.

Once you get down into the back bench independent schools, they're not worth $40k and more to the point, not better academically than your local public. At that point, you're really just saying "hey! Private at any cost!" Which is understandable if your local high school is Dunbar. But sending a kid to Bullis over Walter Johnson (because gds, sta, sidwell and maret said "no") is questionable.

This. You should not apply to a school that you don't really want to send your kid to, unless public is just not an option for some reason. This isn't like applying to college, where if you don't get accepted, you don't go.

We eliminated some private schools from our list after we toured the public and we couldn't see that the private was better, let alone $40K/year better.

I disagree with the advice to apply to multiple safety (backup) schools, on top of 5 choice independents, unless your public option is a nonstarter.

Once you get down into the back bench independent schools, they're not worth $40k and more to the point, not better academically than your local public. At that point, you're really just saying "hey! Private at any cost!" Which is understandable if your local high school is Dunbar. But sending a kid to Bullis over Walter Johnson (because gds, sta, sidwell and maret said "no") is questionable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is applying to 4 schools he really likes, including one that I think is not going to be academically challenging enough. He’s also applying to 1 school that I like but he doesn’t. All 5 are somewhat to very competitive. Should he also apply to 1-2 backup schools? If he ends up accepted at a backup and waitlisted at one or more of the schools he really likes, how difficult would it be to switch later? Along that line, does the waitlist just mean for that year and you reapply the next year? Or are you on the waitlist for multiple years? If you have to reapply every year, how does that work if you need recs etc from the backup school you’re attending? If you still don’t get into your preferred school, have you hurt your standing at the backup you’re attending? Or do you just accept that if you only get into the backup that that’s where you’re going til the end?

Always, always, always apply to backups. This is true for applications to schools for all academic levels - lower school through and including graduate school. I remember the tears flowing from my high school classmates at my very competitive high school in northern Virginia when their parents had selected only the most competitive colleges for their kids to apply to, with no real backups. And they didn't get into any college. Not a single one. In this area, with so many talented kids competing for spots, always, always, always have a backup plan. You won't regret it. You'll also find that, in some instances, those schools you thought were a backup end up being a wonderful place for your kid and they end up being happy there. I applied this philosophy to our kids, when we were applying for private schools for them. Even though we ended up applying to a lot of schools, which was certainly a lot of work for us, it reduced the stress on the kids considerably. They knew they'd go to some school where they'd be happy, so no pressure to get into "the one."

I agree with this advice, but seriously, you knew kids who got into no colleges? That is really awful.

Anonymous wrote:DS is applying to 4 schools he really likes, including one that I think is not going to be academically challenging enough. He’s also applying to 1 school that I like but he doesn’t. All 5 are somewhat to very competitive. Should he also apply to 1-2 backup schools? If he ends up accepted at a backup and waitlisted at one or more of the schools he really likes, how difficult would it be to switch later? Along that line, does the waitlist just mean for that year and you reapply the next year? Or are you on the waitlist for multiple years? If you have to reapply every year, how does that work if you need recs etc from the backup school you’re attending? If you still don’t get into your preferred school, have you hurt your standing at the backup you’re attending? Or do you just accept that if you only get into the backup that that’s where you’re going til the end?

Always, always, always apply to backups. This is true for applications to schools for all academic levels - lower school through and including graduate school. I remember the tears flowing from my high school classmates at my very competitive high school in northern Virginia when their parents had selected only the most competitive colleges for their kids to apply to, with no real backups. And they didn't get into any college. Not a single one. In this area, with so many talented kids competing for spots, always, always, always have a backup plan. You won't regret it. You'll also find that, in some instances, those schools you thought were a backup end up being a wonderful place for your kid and they end up being happy there. I applied this philosophy to our kids, when we were applying for private schools for them. Even though we ended up applying to a lot of schools, which was certainly a lot of work for us, it reduced the stress on the kids considerably. They knew they'd go to some school where they'd be happy, so no pressure to get into "the one."

Depends on the competitiveness of the schools. If he applied to St. Albans, Sidwell, Maret and GDS he should apply to more. If he included other (and equally capable) schools, he should be fine. Do not depend on WL. It will never come through (unless you have special access).

Actually, I'm most interested in the one he likes, but you don't. Why is that? Might be right/might be wrong. But, the decision about that school is the one that will best describe your relationship with your son moving forward (whether he attends or not).

Be well.

Up to you of course, but I think 5 schools sounds like a lot already and wouldn't add any more. good luck!!

WL is only relevant to next year. You will have to re-apply for any following years. And if you choose to do so, you'll have to navigate disclosing that fact to the school you're enrolled in at the time. If you re-apply every year, I do think that would be frowned upon by the current school. My personal opinion is you're better off giving your child an opportunity to "bloom where they are planted" for a few years before considering an immediate "upgrade."

How difficult is it to accept a spot from a WL depends on the timing. My recollection is that after you are admitted, you will very quickly have to put down a non-refundable deposit of about $1000 to hold your spot. Then in June or July, you have to sign a tuition contract to pay the full year's tuition. If you are admitted off the WL early before signing the tuition contract, you can forfeit the $1000 and switch schools. But after signing the tuition contract, you are pretty much committed to that school (unless you want to pay two tuitions).

DS is applying to 4 schools he really likes, including one that I think is not going to be academically challenging enough. He’s also applying to 1 school that I like but he doesn’t. All 5 are somewhat to very competitive. Should he also apply to 1-2 backup schools? If he ends up accepted at a backup and waitlisted at one or more of the schools he really likes, how difficult would it be to switch later? Along that line, does the waitlist just mean for that year and you reapply the next year? Or are you on the waitlist for multiple years? If you have to reapply every year, how does that work if you need recs etc from the backup school you’re attending? If you still don’t get into your preferred school, have you hurt your standing at the backup you’re attending? Or do you just accept that if you only get into the backup that that’s where you’re going til the end?