Anonymous
12/11/2017 00:05
Subject: Re:Self fulfilling prophecy?
Can’t imagine why you would stay with a verbally abusive, unkind man. Setting a bad example for children if they are in the picture. Get some self esteem, stop allowing him to denigrate you. Start making plans for a better life for yourself - have an escape plan if needed and sock some money away. Consult a counselor for yourself to figure out why you allow him to treat you so badly.
Anonymous
12/11/2017 00:05
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Anonymous wrote:DH is going to try a 2-month no b-word trial run and if I get nicer, he said he'll extend it so here's hoping that the reverse is true and I will become nicer when he stops calling me a b-word.
Everything else is fine but he is just an unemotional/immature guy who doesn't have a lot of empathy in general -- not even for our kids when they get hurt or have a bad day and just doesn't understand why I'm so upset over this word.
I do think this willi lead to a better family life and I don't think I can leave him for calling me a b-word. I think I'd need a little more reason to break up our family altho I do wish I had the husband who only used terms of endearment. Where was he 7 years ago?
What the heck? He'll stop calling you it and if you're nice then he'll continue to not call you it? He just shouldn't call you a bitch in the first place.
Anonymous
12/11/2017 00:00
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Anonymous wrote:You seem kind of bitchy.
Like I said, I'm totally becoming one! It's true! I'm the first to admit that 7 years of being called a b-word has totally made me into one.
Anonymous
12/10/2017 23:59
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
DH is going to try a 2-month no b-word trial run and if I get nicer, he said he'll extend it so here's hoping that the reverse is true and I will become nicer when he stops calling me a b-word.
Everything else is fine but he is just an unemotional/immature guy who doesn't have a lot of empathy in general -- not even for our kids when they get hurt or have a bad day and just doesn't understand why I'm so upset over this word.
I do think this willi lead to a better family life and I don't think I can leave him for calling me a b-word. I think I'd need a little more reason to break up our family altho I do wish I had the husband who only used terms of endearment. Where was he 7 years ago?
Everything else is fine but he is just an unemotional/immature guy who doesn't have a lot of empathy in general -- not even for our kids when they get hurt or have a bad day and just doesn't understand why I'm so upset over this word.
I do think this willi lead to a better family life and I don't think I can leave him for calling me a b-word. I think I'd need a little more reason to break up our family altho I do wish I had the husband who only used terms of endearment. Where was he 7 years ago?
Anonymous
12/09/2017 11:32
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
You seem kind of bitchy.
Anonymous
12/09/2017 09:58
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Anonymous wrote:DH overuses the b-word. He calls me it all the time
I realized that I'm starting to become one so now he's escalated it to mean b-word.
I've tried to explain that he's making me into a mean b-word by calling me it. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. He says that's impossible. But I feel that's the reason. Has anyone heard of someone turning mean because their spouse calls them mean?
If he just called me nice things, I'd become nicer. He says that's not true. Can someone back me up here?
Why don't you start calling him a__hole? Hey a__hole, please take out the garbage? Hey a__hole, can you drop the kids off?
See if he still thinks it's "impossible" for a spouse to be mean when he/she is disrespected.
Anonymous
12/09/2017 09:51
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
The guy who calls you a b$&*h is the guy who will eventually punch you in the face.
Anonymous
12/09/2017 09:32
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Anonymous wrote:
I honestly cannot imagine being with someone who'd routinely call me a bitch.
The word should be taken off the table. You don't need to have this elaborate reasoning for it. It's just unacceptable.
+1. This is verbal abuse. And emotional abuse, because he is dismissing your feelings about it. This is a classic cycle. And it escalates the conflict. He could be trying to make you out to look like a crazy person. Google "crazy maker."
Anonymous
12/09/2017 08:52
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Anonymous wrote:How's the sex?
Anonymous
12/09/2017 08:46
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
How's the sex?
Anonymous
12/09/2017 00:55
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
I honestly cannot imagine being with someone who'd routinely call me a bitch.
The word should be taken off the table. You don't need to have this elaborate reasoning for it. It's just unacceptable.
Lonely_Sojourner
12/09/2017 00:43
Subject: Re:Self fulfilling prophecy?
OP - I never called my wife a name other than a term of endearment.... You don’t speak to or of someone negatively that you love.
L_S
L_S
Anonymous
12/08/2017 23:41
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Sure, people often live up, or down, to expectations.
Why are you with this pathetic loser again exactly?
Why are you with this pathetic loser again exactly?
Anonymous
12/08/2017 23:10
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
Sure can.
Your husband is a disrespectful jerk who is so immature that he refuses to take any accountability for his horrible behavior toward you.
He thinks nothing wrong of calling you derogatory monikers.
Sure....
Sooner or later you will start being what he thinks you are.
Who wouldn’t??
You might as well since that is what he thinks you are anyway.
I know that I would.
Your husband is a disrespectful jerk who is so immature that he refuses to take any accountability for his horrible behavior toward you.
He thinks nothing wrong of calling you derogatory monikers.
Sure....
Sooner or later you will start being what he thinks you are.
Who wouldn’t??
You might as well since that is what he thinks you are anyway.
I know that I would.
Anonymous
12/08/2017 22:59
Subject: Self fulfilling prophecy?
DH overuses the b-word. He calls me it all the time
I realized that I'm starting to become one so now he's escalated it to mean b-word.
I've tried to explain that he's making me into a mean b-word by calling me it. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. He says that's impossible. But I feel that's the reason. Has anyone heard of someone turning mean because their spouse calls them mean?
If he just called me nice things, I'd become nicer. He says that's not true. Can someone back me up here?
I realized that I'm starting to become one so now he's escalated it to mean b-word.
I've tried to explain that he's making me into a mean b-word by calling me it. It's a self fulfilling prophecy. He says that's impossible. But I feel that's the reason. Has anyone heard of someone turning mean because their spouse calls them mean?
If he just called me nice things, I'd become nicer. He says that's not true. Can someone back me up here?