The biggest issue my kids had was keeping track of the assignments and expectations for all the different classes. DD had it the worst because in her 6th year her teachers used a wide variety of ways to put assignments online -- some used Google Classroom, some had their own websites, some didn't do anything digital. That was really frustrating. DS's teachers more consistently used Google Classroom so it was easy to see everything in one place.

^^ Do you mean they don't change clothes for PE any more?

I can't remember if we had the kind of transition help from ES to MS when I was in MS (early 80's). As a PP noted, the only really big difference are:

1. PE and changing clothes
2. locker
3. different teachers

IMO, the biggest issue for me was PE/changing clothes. I hated that. I feel like kids are more coddled these days. A part of me likes it that my kids are helped more, but a part of me sees it as coddling which isn't always helpful in the long run. I have kid in MS.

My kids had a great transition. But one thing... we are in the QO district and our elementary school was nearly all white and the middle school had 2 other elementary schools- one around 50% white and the other majority hispanic. My first kid was a little shocked at first because he wasn't used to the diversity. But other than that, it wasn't bad and they were very excited.

OP here. Thank you everyone, for your helpful and thoughtful replies.

Anonymous wrote:I have found it's a tougher transition for some than others. The schools do a nice job of preparing the kids for the routine and logistics. But if your child struggles socially or is shy, the transition can be painful. For kids with executive functioning issues that are not receiving supports, it can also be tough. In general, I have found the boys adjust better than the girls. There's just so much drama with MS girls!

With some girls, there is. Not with all girls. And boys are not drama-free either.

I have found it's a tougher transition for some than others. The schools do a nice job of preparing the kids for the routine and logistics. But if your child struggles socially or is shy, the transition can be painful. For kids with executive functioning issues that are not receiving supports, it can also be tough. In general, I have found the boys adjust better than the girls. There's just so much drama with MS girls!

If our MS is any indication, schools do a really good job with the 6th graders. I was concerned for my DS, most of our ES feeds into a different MS so very few of his friends were going to MS with him. But he loved 6th grade. Enjoyed the greater independence, PE every day, changing classes, variety of classes and teachers...

I was very concerned about this as I had a kid who really struggled with the transition from preschool to kindergarten. Elementary to middle was really no big deal and my ds loves middle school. I have found some kids really thrive on the independence and the movement between classes and do really well.

OP, I think that they are trying to help, not because it's hard for everybody, but rather because helping is helpful. Would they be fine without the help? Most would be fine, yes. Are more kids less worried as a result of the help/ Yes, I think so.

They go through the shadow day just fine, but it's mainly due to coming from a small ES to a larger MS that rolls up 5 ESs. Which is common in most school systems in the U.S. (you go to a neighborhood ES, and then a (usually much farther away, bigger MS and HS)).

In general 7-12 is great because you can really start picking your spots to focus on or trying out new things in order to develop interests and potential focus areas in college. Your kid will likely have several circles of friends in MS and HS depending on activities, in addition to neighborhood ES friends.

My child just went through this transition. All the visits and planning in 5th grade are really just about choosing your electives (art, music, language, etc.) and, in the spring or early summer, touring the school so the kids won't be as lost the first day.

Practically, the major change is the size of the student body and the fact that they need to keep up with homework from 6 classes. My child was a little worried but has lived up to it very well. It's a good age to be given these greater responsibilities.

I agree with PP...lockers seem to be the biggest stress. Most kids seem love it. More PE. Lots of teachers and kids so you are not stuck with someone you don't like all year. They feel very independent switching classes.

I've had 2 kids do this transition and socially/structurally, both found it quite easy. One had a bit of challenge with the new accountability in MS (5th grade was easy, had little homework, and if he missed turning in assignments, I never heard about it; 6th grade has much more homework, you get zeros if you forget your assignments at home, and mom finds out!

But nothing that you are describing (shadow days, etc) would help with this. What they need is more homework and accountability in 5th grade!

btw, the visit from counselors is largely to help them understand elective offerings and choose what classes to take. (You don't have a lot of choice, but you have a little in MS.)

I do think, though, that kids who are prone to anxiety get very concerned about the transition-- lockers seems to be the biggest stressor!

Can you please share your stories of how your kid managed with the change from ES to MS?

Our kid is due to start at Pyle in Sept next year and their current ES seems very focused on aiding the transition, having shadow days, visits, visits from counselors etc to their ES. It makes me wonder how hard it will be.

I moved from a European city to the US for MS and it was tough, a complete change, but totally manageable and I had no hand-holding.

I am wondering what the deal is - do you think its to do mostly with over-crowding and how overwhelming that may be to the kids?

ideas appreciated (well, the non-sarcastic, helpful ones at least...)