Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

I have taught my three sons - 15, 13, 10 - to hold the door open for whomever is behind them, as well. I would not, however, tell them to try to embarrass those people who do not acknowledge their polite gesture, as that is not polite nor gentlemanly. While people should say thank you, it's not our job to school them in manners and appropriate behavior, especially a child to an adult. That ship has already sailed. I'm raising my sons, not other adults, and that type of reaction is boorish.

This! Previous PP - that's called being passive-aggressive. Not cool.

Yes, I'm from Texas. 46.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

That's equally rude.

I was taught that you do kind gestures and good deeds for their own value, not for any gratitude. I don't need a show of gratitude or thanks from someone to validate my courtesy. If they say something, that's wonderful, I'll respond "You're welcome" If they don't, I go on my merry way. I show gratitude, but don't expect it.

+1. I think that's rude too. You do what's right because it's the right thing to do. No other action necessary.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

That's equally rude.

I was taught that you do kind gestures and good deeds for their own value, not for any gratitude. I don't need a show of gratitude or thanks from someone to validate my courtesy. If they say something, that's wonderful, I'll respond "You're welcome" If they don't, I go on my merry way. I show gratitude, but don't expect it.

OK, so the "sexist" (or chivalrous) version of holding the door is that the man ALWAYS opens it for a woman, and she will never make a move to open it herself. So, a family is walking along, and comes to the door of the restaurant. The woman waits, arms down, for the man to open the door and wave her in. Or, a man is talking to a colleague, and sees a woman approaching the other side of a glass door. He would say, "Excuse me" to his conversation partner, and open the door for the lady, who would fully expect it.

Opening doors for someone coming up right behind you, man or woman, is the egalitarian thing to do. The egalitarian move is not that you let the door go so the woman can open it herself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

I have taught my three sons - 15, 13, 10 - to hold the door open for whomever is behind them, as well. I would not, however, tell them to try to embarrass those people who do not acknowledge their polite gesture, as that is not polite nor gentlemanly. While people should say thank you, it's not our job to school them in manners and appropriate behavior, especially a child to an adult. That ship has already sailed. I'm raising my sons, not other adults, and that type of reaction is boorish.

+1. I've taught my kids to hold the door for whoever is coming behind them and to appreciate a thank you but don't get upset if someone doesn't say thank you. You are doing it to give a momentary kindness to the person behind you, not because you might get a thank you. If it bothers you that people don't say thank you, make doubly sure that you do say thank you when it's your turn to go through the door someone is holding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

I have taught my three sons - 15, 13, 10 - to hold the door open for whomever is behind them, as well. I would not, however, tell them to try to embarrass those people who do not acknowledge their polite gesture, as that is not polite nor gentlemanly. While people should say thank you, it's not our job to school them in manners and appropriate behavior, especially a child to an adult. That ship has already sailed. I'm raising my sons, not other adults, and that type of reaction is boorish.

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

I taught my 10 year old son to hold the door open for whoever is behind him or looks like they are coming to the door. A lot of people will not say thank you to him. Told him to loudly say, “you are welcome.” He always gets a thank you after that

Anonymous wrote:How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

at least 1/2.

How many seconds will you stand and wait for an able-bodied, unencumbered person to walk through the door?
I say 3-5 seconds.

I'm a woman who holds the door a lot. I'm sometimes surprised at the number of women who don't say thanks.

Of course. Mama didn't raise no fool.

35 years old.

I'm 52. If I am closest to the door, I hold it open for anyone who is going through, male or female.

Yes, and other men as well. I'll also hold the door open for kids. I'll even say thank you sir or ma'am if someone holds the door open for me.

Age 44 (soon to be 45)

Yes, 46.

But I also hold the door for men. Or, whoever is behind me. It's not chivalry.

Yes or no? And how old are you?