OP here, thanks! DH has actually calmed down quite a bit, he spent a lot of time this morning reading about tattoo regret is pretty normal and eventually goes away. He's going to talk with his tattooist and other ones in town to see if it can be fixed.

For those wondering- no, I didn't push him to get the tattoo. He had been thinking about it for awhile and decided to go for it. I didn't care either way.

Is this the first symptom of a serious illness (either a mental disorder or a brain tumor)?

If he's been like this before, you tell him to SHUT UP because he's being a jerk and unfair to everyone. His mistake, not yours. Yell louder, be angry for longer and don't lift a finger for him until he behaves better. Don't allow him in the bed - he can sleep elsewhere. Hit hard, otherwise he'll think it's OK to do this for ever.

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing either:
1. She pushed him to get a tattoo, or
2. Troll

Ding, ding, ding....we have a winner !!!!

I'm guessing either:
1. She pushed him to get a tattoo, or
2. Troll

One of my husband least attractive traits is his tendency to lash out at others when he did something stupid. I don't have a fix for this problem; that shit is hard-wired into my DH as far as I can tell.

But I can recommend that you stop being the punching bag. Point out what he's doing, then stop taking his shit. This is his problem; he can fix it. Stop giving him positive reinforcement for shitty behavior. Is that supportive? No. But he doesn't particularly need your support now; he needs to fix his own problem. And he certainly doesn't deserve your support.

(And fwiw, I love tattoos! I've avoided getting one myself for a long time for fear of changing my mind but I think I've settled on one for my 40th birthday).

Carve it out of his skin with a box cutter.

Unless you tied him down and gave him the tattoo, it was his decision and he needs to own that. Why are YOU offering to get a part time job to pay for removal? How is that sane? Any further research is on him, and you need to let him know that you won't listen to any further complaining unless he plans to do something about it.

Keep your distance from him for a few days. You've gone above and beyond to support him. He'll get over it eventually.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it possibly your fault

How is this possibly real and not a troll post?

There are all kinds of stupid people out there.

Anonymous wrote:How is it possibly your fault

How is this possibly real and not a troll post?

Anonymous wrote:Divorce. What kind of an adult gets a tattoo? Ridiculous.

Plenty of them that don’t have enormous sticks up their asses.

OP, it’s probably sinking in his permanent a tattoo can be and I suspect that might be what’s driving this anxiety. I don’t agree that he should take it out on you and I don’t have any advice as to what you can possibly do differently because you do seem supportive and open to solutions with him which is the most he can ask. I tend to agree with you that he should have it finished before he makes a final decision because a lot of tattoos look incredibly different after they’re completely done. And a great tattoo artist can often cover up or alter almost anything!

He’s acting silly, but if it’s only been a few days, cut him a little slack. “Divorce” or “don’t have kids with this man!!” are a bit over dramatic. Imagine how you would feel if you got a really awful haircut or you colored your hair and it came out bright orange by accident. You’d probably freak for a few days too, imagining things like the only way to fix it was to shave your head and things like that. This seems like the same to me (and I’ve been down that hair color road before). Let him vent, indulge him a few days and be a good listener. Keep doing what you’re doing and I bet after the shock finally wears off things will be normal again.

This is one incident.

Did you force him to get the tattoo or something? Is he like this with other things? He sounds unhinged and unable to deal with things. Please don't have kids with this man.

Divorce. What kind of an adult gets a tattoo? Ridiculous.

How is it possibly your fault

My Dh got a tattoo a few days ago and he *hates* it. Now he's acting like a child throwing a temper tantrum, treating everyone like crap because of it, and repeatedly tells me I'm not being "supportive". I've listened to him cry, bit my tongue when he blamed me for it, looked up tattoo removal services, offered to get a part time weekend job to help pay for removal, offered to take pictures to other artists in town to see if it can be fixed, and explained that part of the problem is that it isn't finished, so of course it looks like crap and he should speak with the artist at his next session.

Now he's waking up in the middle of the night to "talk" (blame) me for it, and if I say anything he tells me to shut up because he's mad. I don't know how much more supportive I can be, I've done everything I can think of. I'm tired of him acting like a teenage girl.

What am I missing here? I don't see how this is the end of the world. People get crappy tattoos and get them removed all the time. What else can I do to be supportive?