Anonymous wrote:He well earned that shot. Let him or he will regret it.
Even if it fails, that's life. With your assets you don't have to live in fear. I guess as a SAHM you don't feel powerful enough to dig yourself out of a hole. Maybe work on that.

Hmmm. I can't imagine a person satisfied with their own personal power writing that. And it isn't about being able to dig oneself out of a hole or not, the OP is trying to (wisely) not get in a hole in the first place. Its hard to understand what it feels like to risk millions when you have never done it.

He can't be that big a spender if y'all have banked that much cash, and live in a house with an unfinished basement. If you guys had no savings, the answer would be different, but with that much money, his plan is reasonable.

He well earned that shot. Let him or he will regret it.
Even if it fails, that's life. With your assets you don't have to live in fear. I guess as a SAHM you don't feel powerful enough to dig yourself out of a hole. Maybe work on that.

Anonymous wrote:You're liquid for $2.7mln. You can easily survive on that for 3 years, even at your current spending rate. If the startup doens't pan out, he can get another job for $600k again.

His thinking makes sense to me.

But maybe some of that was earmarked for retirement or college? Especially the portion OP said was invested, "only" $1.2 was in cash.

$100k a year is still income. How much will you be using from savings every month? Obviously we don't know the industry, etc. but this does not necessarily sound like a bad plan to me.

OP he's clearly thought this through. What are your monthly expenses? $10k? You have more than enough money for many many years. If he really wants to give this a go, and has really done his research, let him try.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, he’s the one going to the job every day and doing the work, so I say it’s his choice.

So because she doesn't work (for pay), she has no right to be concerned about money?

She has a right to be concerned but at current spending they have no change. Just think of saving as deferred compensation would she be involved then?

What is his role and industry. There is a bit of a tech bubble potential here. What is the expected time line to profit.

But end of day your division was you trust him to make money and you take care of home. I would not last down the law in spending ; that will just breed resentment and stress and there will be PLENTY of stress already for him at the startup. For example the basement is 2% of your liquid assets, and adds value to your home so it isn't like completely gone.

Basically, you have enough cash to live like he was pulling normal income for 3 years, which is obviously his plan.

You have to trust him ; he is providing just as he is supposed to only from a mix of savings and salary rather than just salary. Don't undermine him just like he should undermine you at home

Anonymous wrote:Well, he’s the one going to the job every day and doing the work, so I say it’s his choice.

Oh hell no. Marriage is a PARTNERSHIP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, he’s the one going to the job every day and doing the work, so I say it’s his choice.

So because she doesn't work (for pay), she has no right to be concerned about money?

Is that how you guys do things? Gosh. I feel fortunate, we make choices that will impact our family as a team.

You're liquid for $2.7mln. You can easily survive on that for 3 years, even at your current spending rate. If the startup doens't pan out, he can get another job for $600k again.

His thinking makes sense to me.

Your cash holdings are insane (gosh have you missed out on a lot of earnings!). Of course you can do this. If it doesn't seem to be working out I'm presuming he can easily get another high earning job. My friends didi this ~ he took zero salary due to a non compete, he was compensated in stock for three years. When the company went public he made millions over millions. My friend had been a SAHM, when he transitioned into no pay she went back as an RN for 2 years to help balance the cash outlay.

Anonymous wrote:Well, he’s the one going to the job every day and doing the work, so I say it’s his choice.

So because she doesn't work (for pay), she has no right to be concerned about money?

Well, he’s the one going to the job every day and doing the work, so I say it’s his choice.

^ here's an example for you re: spending. Before all this came up, we were planning to finish our basement. It'll probably cost around 50k total. I said, well we have to put a kibosh on that. He's like why, 50k isn't going to make or break us. This is insanity right!! You don't spend 50k when you're planning to take a massive paycut.

He'd go from over 600k to 100k plus a 10% equity stake or more. Obviously the equity is the thing he's after and it's not something he can negotiate where he's at currently. He's tired of building value for other people without seriously participating in it. I do understand that. However, I'm a SAHM and we have three little kids (4-9). I'm kind of freaked out. We live below our means and save a lot. We're sitting on 1.2M in cash right now. We have another 1.5M in investments. Unbeknownst to me, this is why we have so much cash. He's been planning to spend down our savings while he tries this out. He says it'll take 3 years to know if it works or not. If it doesn't, he'll look for a better paying job. I don't feel right spending down our savings, however, so if he does this, I think we should live very simply in the meantime. No eating out, no vacations, no purchases except for the strictly necessary for the kids like shoes etc. etc. I have a strong suspicion that he'll have a much harder time with this than me. He's used to just buying and spending whatever.

Am I allowed to tell him that if he does this, he needs to drastically cut his spending? Am I allowed to voice concerns re: money? I have to stand by and let him try this right? The worst thing would be if I said no and then he has to watch their company take off.

I'm thinking about going back to work but there are some problems with that. 1. for various reasons that I can't go into on here, I can't go back to my old field (burned my bridges big time). Fwiw, it was my husband's idea that I SAHM and he's always said he doesn't think I should go back to work back when it would have been easier to do so. 2. I don't think I'm qualified to do anything else except the most basic office work. I haven't worked in 8 years. Maybe I could get a waitressing job at night or something for the spending money? 3.) our youngest won't be in full time school for another 2 years.

ugh. I have such a bad feeling about this. What would you do? Just sit back and watch?