Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were you EVER 13, OP?

I was and did not act like that. Ridiculous.

My parents were very well off, but my mom would have (and did) called me out for speaking like that. I, on the other hand, am poor, but also teach my kids that money isn't the most important thing.

Tell your DD to put her phone away. Don't ask what she would like - you choose the activities. One per day. Doesn't have to be expensive - mini golf, beach amusement or water slides, rent a kayak, get a skim board, see a movie, visit the shell shop, walk on the board walk or in town or whatever. You have to do things together and talk to each other.

Just because you divorced and are struggling financially doesn't mean you have to let your kid grow up spoiled.

Sounds like she is super focused on material things and likes her wealthier relatives. Have an even cheaper staycation with her next time, and go somewhere fun for yourself when she is with Dad on their vacation. No use in trying to compete.

Anonymous wrote:Were you EVER 13, OP?

I was, and more recently, a year ago my daughter was. And she would NEVER talk that way. She knows how hard I work and how much I consider costs of things. She is very appreciative when she gets wants rather than needs. I think OP needs to give her daughter a big talk about life and kindness and costs and budgeting.

Anonymous wrote:If her kid brings a friend, doesn't that defeat the purpose of spending time together? She'll just be the third wheel.

OP, go smaller next time. Do a movie, lunch, or shopping.
It's normal at 13 not to want to be seen anywhere near your parents.

She loves spending time with her dad and stepmom.

TAKE THE PHONE AWAY.

Geez, this is not hard.

Anonymous wrote:I took my 13 year old daughter on a beach weekend getaway. She has no interest in doing anything but stay on her phone. She said her dad and stepmom take her to better beaches than this. I asked her what would she like to do and she said she's fine with what she's doing. She said I need to learn to plan better vacations like her dad and other members of his family. Truth is, I don't have the money to take her on nice trips like on cruises, Europe, South America, etc. so I work with what I have. Unfortunately it's not good enough for her. I'm wondering if I should give up on trying to plan vacations.

I can understand her being bored and being wedded to her phone but her comment was terrible and I hope you called her out on it. It's hurtful and uncalled for.

Anonymous wrote:Were you EVER 13, OP?

I was and did not act like that. Ridiculous.

If her kid brings a friend, doesn't that defeat the purpose of spending time together? She'll just be the third wheel.

OP, go smaller next time. Do a movie, lunch, or shopping.
It's normal at 13 not to want to be seen anywhere near your parents.

Congratulations OP, you have a normal teenager. I agree with letting her bring a friend if the $ can be worked out.

Were you EVER 13, OP?

OP, treat yourself to a nice solo vacation while she is with her dad. Use the money you would have spent on her for fun activities and nice meals. DD can join you on vacation when she matures and doesn't behave like an ungrateful little shit.

Anonymous wrote:Is it just you two? If so, boring! Let her invite a friend or cousin next time

Maybe OP can't afford to pay for a third person.

Is it just you two? If so, boring! Let her invite a friend or cousin next time

Staycation next time. Your job is to provide bonding opportunities not fodder for her SM.

I took my 13 year old daughter on a beach weekend getaway. She has no interest in doing anything but stay on her phone. She said her dad and stepmom take her to better beaches than this. I asked her what would she like to do and she said she's fine with what she's doing. She said I need to learn to plan better vacations like her dad and other members of his family. Truth is, I don't have the money to take her on nice trips like on cruises, Europe, South America, etc. so I work with what I have. Unfortunately it's not good enough for her. I'm wondering if I should give up on trying to plan vacations.