Anonymous wrote:My DW would echo OP's sentiments. Perhaps she is OP.

What is super frustrating for me is how often I turn down other women who proposition me during business travel. Yes, it really happens, a lot. Then, I come home to someone who can't fathom sex with me.

Marriage is wonderful for lots of things, sex is not among them.

So what, I get hit on all the time. I don't think it means much except there are lots of awful people in the world, since I am obviously married.

She can't have 1 day to get some rest, you need to hump her at the door.

All of a sudden it means she can't "fathom sex with me".. me thinks your tampon is leaking.

My DW would echo OP's sentiments. Perhaps she is OP.

What is super frustrating for me is how often I turn down other women who proposition me during business travel. Yes, it really happens, a lot. Then, I come home to someone who can't fathom sex with me.

Marriage is wonderful for lots of things, sex is not among them.

Anonymous wrote:I guess because he believes you are his loving wife who cares about him, misses him, wants to be with him, and that you too might have some tiny shred of sexual desire?

This is what me, OP's husband, and all husbands want to believe.

Then, reality hits. It took me years to finally realize the woman I married is no longer the same woman. I can empathize with her sacrifice, her exhaustion, her need for alone time. But no amount of rational thought redirects the obvious: my wife would rather do almost anything rather than re-connect sexually with me.

I am so super jealous of those married couples who still want to sleep with each other, and don't need perfect conditions to do so. How wonderful married life must be for them!

A few days apart usually results in increased desire.

It is usually what's on my mind when my husband returns!

Anonymous wrote:I am a wife, and I can't imagine not having sex with my husband the first night I am home from a business trip. Time to push past that fatigue, lady. And we have been together over 20 years, so I'm neither young nor in a new marriage.

If there were more women like you, the world would be a better place.

My wife's libido will get derailed by ANY amount of fatigue/stress/whatever.

We're mid-30s, both healthy, and I give her Os.

-NP

I love when the sex-starved morons all post nonsensical responses. Of course, OP is tired and wants to rest. Give her a break!

p.s. There is a reason why no one wants to have sex with you. Your social skills are lacking.

Anonymous wrote:The young woman who will eventually steal him from you must be getting him revved up. At least he hasn't caved yet.

That's not necessarily true. Even if I have sex during my business trips, I make sure to approach my spouse for sex as soon as I get home.

I am a wife, and I can't imagine not having sex with my husband the first night I am home from a business trip. Time to push past that fatigue, lady. And we have been together over 20 years, so I'm neither young nor in a new marriage.

It sounds like you two barely communicate.

Why?

You just need to tell him that when he walks in the house after a long business trip (I hope we are talking about more than 2 days here) that you need sleep, that you will go to bed early (he can put the kids to bed) and sleep in the next day and he should plan a day with the kids (since he obviously is a good father and what type of father does not miss his kids and want to spend a day with them after being gone), When he tires the kids out from the day, you will be ready for some lovin... he should probably get a babysitter so the kids are not in the way.

I am sure he can wait until the next night, not the minute he walks in the door, I mean he is not a neanderthal is he?

Communication!

Anonymous wrote:I guess because he believes you are his loving wife who cares about him, misses him, wants to be with him, and that you too might have some tiny shred of sexual desire?

Well said!

The young woman who will eventually steal him from you must be getting him revved up. At least he hasn't caved yet.

You need to learn better time management. You make it sound like these tasks overwhelm you. That's not normal.

I guess because he believes you are his loving wife who cares about him, misses him, wants to be with him, and that you too might have some tiny shred of sexual desire?

I understand he gets lonely and misses me. But does he understand that while he was sleeping in and not doing any laundry or dishes or any cooking or grocery shopping, that I was doing all of that and child care and pick up and drop off and the l.a.s.t. thing I am thinking about is sex, because all I want to do is get 12 hours of sleep?!!!