If she wants to go then let her go. Spending the night with local friends and relatives is nothing like being away at college. Not to mention, both Maryland and Temple are very close, she could come home often on the weekends if she wanted to.

I don't think there is anything wrong with going to community college, it's a very good option to have. With that said, I think going away to college and living on campus is part of growing up and learning how to be independent but in somewhat of a controlled environment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they got into a 4 yr school, they should go - - they earned it.

She got into Maryland and Temple. She really wants to go to Temple, but I know she's not ready to be away from home. She gets homesick spending the night with friends/relatives that are local.

ding, ding, ding! If SHE WANTS to ..., then she has the drive in her and it's just a matter of testing that will. This is where growth occurs... in the zone b/t what we're comfortable doing and what we're not sure we can do. It's the place where we stretch just enough beyond comfort. The fact that she is motivated to go to Temple is a very good sign. If you visit there once and then she starts chatting on line with other kids going there, and then she is assigned a roommate... all of that is the natural progression of making her more comfortable. It will still be hard, but if she tries it for two months before she can have a weekend pass to come home, I bet she will succeed and grow more than you ever expected.

If she said she didn't want to go... then that would pretty much ensure that she wouldn't adapt well. But, she wants to do it... give her the confidence to try.

One of my brothers wasn't especially motivated and our parents said that he could live at home after HS as long as he was enrolled in community college classes. He worked and took a class each term. Once he found what interested him, he switched to full-time CC work to finish the Associates and transferred to a four-year school that had the degree he wanted.

I think my family was more excited for his graduation than any other in the family.

There's really no community at community college. If she doesn't need the academic transition, could she go to Maryland and live at home freshman year?

Or could she live on campus and still come home one weekend a month? I had a kid who I had some doubts about, but I didn't force those doubts on her or ever raise any concerns that she couldn't do it. Don't feed your kid's anxiety. They know whether they are ready to leave home or not.

then you're have an immature, scaredy cat, degree-less child forever living with you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they got into a 4 yr school, they should go - - they earned it.

She got into Maryland and Temple. She really wants to go to Temple, but I know she's not ready to be away from home. She gets homesick spending the night with friends/relatives that are local.

There's really no community at community college. If she doesn't need the academic transition, could she go to Maryland and live at home freshman year?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they got into a 4 yr school, they should go - - they earned it.

She got into Maryland and Temple. She really wants to go to Temple, but I know she's not ready to be away from home. She gets homesick spending the night with friends/relatives that are local.

See what the 2-yr transfer situation is. I went to community college for 2 years and got into an Ivy and 3 other good schools.

Anonymous wrote:If they got into a 4 yr school, they should go - - they earned it.

She got into Maryland and Temple. She really wants to go to Temple, but I know she's not ready to be away from home. She gets homesick spending the night with friends/relatives that are local.

Has anyone had their child start at community college because you didn't think they were mature enough to leave home at 18? If so, how did things work out for your child?

Hmm, I think it can be a good idea of the 18 year old thinks they're not ready to leave home. If they did everything they needed to do to get admitted to a four-year school and want to go, then they should determine whether they go even if a parent thinks maybe they're not ready. Don't base a determination on how your current HS senior is behaving.

Every kid is different though. We don't know your situation. Some people on DCUM would call their kid immature if they don't keep their bedroom neat and tidy, organize everything in a planner, and follow a disciplined exercise routine.

My DC had a very bumpy road through HS (to put it lightly), I had my doubts about sending her - she had absolutely no issues with being 1000+ miles away.

I started out at a community college. This had less to do with grades, or maturity, and more to do with socialization. Almost everyone I knew went to a CC and then transferred to the local state university, except for a handful of wealthy kids, who went away to nice colleges.

I ended up dropping out after a few semesters and started working full-time in a customer support call center, for under $10 an hour (this about 20 years ago) because I wanted to move out of the house. This was before average people had access to so much information about applying for scholarships and financial aid. In hindsight, I wish I had applied because I had good grades and test scores, and probably would have gotten a decent deal from a good school.

I did eventually finish a master's degree at a decent public flagship, and even made Phi Beta Kappa at my undergrad, but I had to work my way through college, while holding down a stressful call center job. I also had basically no social life during this period because all of my time was either at work or school.

The main problem with community colleges is the dropout rates are sky high. This is due to a combination of dealing with kids from lower socioeconomic backgrounds and the general lack of personal attention. A less competitive, but nice, private might be a better choice to at least ensure that your child graduates before getting a $10/hour "full time job."

I got my associates first. It worked really well.
Every credit transferred to any instate school. And with an associates you could pretty much apply to any state school.
Some had agreements in place. Get the AA and your in.

Got my 4 year degree. And earn six figures.

Community college was cheap, let me work 5 days a week and take classes. Win win.

If they got into a 4 yr school, they should go - - they earned it.

I only went to community college, and it had nothing to do with maturity, but academic ability. I earn more than three of my cousins who all have grad school degrees. I think it worked out pretty well.

My friend's son did this and its turned out very well for him. I think it can be a better option for kids who just aren't ready to go and there's nothing wrong with choosing it. People act like it's the end of the world, but I think it can be very smart.

Has anyone had their child start at community college because you didn't think they were mature enough to leave home at 18? If so, how did things work out for your child?