Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

It usually does, in my experience!

That was my own experience too and it is what I see with my DC's and friends!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

It usually does, in my experience!

This is my experience too. But I was a nerd in the 1980s. The 1980s was a bad age to be nerd. (But we won in the end! )

If you are basing this on your own experience, you are likely idealizing/minimizing what happened by the needs to others because that was your tribe. It's a pretty common psychological reaction; people want to be the hero of their own narrative. If you talk with educators who work on bullying issues, most will tell you it's as prevalent in the nerdy/geeky crowd as compared to other crowds. The form may be different (more online/computer harrassment, less physical altercations) but I think you are being naive if you think nerdy/geeky is a straightforward proxy for kindness.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't see this thread ending well. And there is some irony in the fact that you are willing to describe kids who are 4-10 as "social climbing." What about asking instead about the curricula that different schools implement to foster kindness and empathy?

9-10 year olds can show social climbing types of behavior, not in the adult "We simply must be invited to the such-and-such gala" sense but in the "trying to gain popularity or deflect cool kids' attention from my own perceived shortcomings" sense...

I really like the question about curricula to foster kindness and empathy and would add that it would be helpful to hear the actual effects of such a curriculum. I feel like most privates (and publics) can talk a good game about this, but that doesn't mean it's reflected in the school culture.

Yes, they absolutely can. And, in my experience, it often (but not always) reflects their parents being social climbers. But, honestly, I think by using the term "top privates" you're probably already getting that. I think if you look at some of the privates that are less famous or sought after by the kind of parents that are prepping their kids for admission tests and donating tons of money to get their kids in, you might have better luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

It usually does, in my experience!

This is my experience too. But I was a nerd in the 1980s. The 1980s was a bad age to be nerd. (But we won in the end! )

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

It usually does, in my experience!

There are nice kids at all of these schools. Obviously there are probably some not so nice kids too at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

Very true! Although to be fair, OP didn't say s/he would...just that a culture of kindness was more important than whether or not a school community had a reputation for being nerdy or geeky (or something).

Anonymous wrote:I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...

Nerdier/geekier does not translate to kinder/nicer. I wouldn't use that as your barometer.

NPS.
Also Sheridan, which was just named a DC School of Character.

Anonymous wrote:I don't see this thread ending well. And there is some irony in the fact that you are willing to describe kids who are 4-10 as "social climbing." What about asking instead about the curricula that different schools implement to foster kindness and empathy?

9-10 year olds can show social climbing types of behavior, not in the adult "We simply must be invited to the such-and-such gala" sense but in the "trying to gain popularity or deflect cool kids' attention from my own perceived shortcomings" sense...

I really like the question about curricula to foster kindness and empathy and would add that it would be helpful to hear the actual effects of such a curriculum. I feel like most privates (and publics) can talk a good game about this, but that doesn't mean it's reflected in the school culture.

Norwood - incredibly kind community all around

I don't see this thread ending well. And there is some irony in the fact that you are willing to describe kids who are 4-10 as "social climbing." What about asking instead about the curricula that different schools implement to foster kindness and empathy?

NPS really focuses on kindness

When we looked in late lower school, we thought Holton for all girls and Sidwell for co-ed.

We did not look before 3rd

I went to one and the kids were pretty mean oh so long ago ... is there one with a reputation for kids who are just nicer and less social climbing? I'm totally fine if that means they are nerdier/geekier or something - I recognize this may.m be a true fantasy...