Anonymous wrote:Do you tell your kids to not post pictures from events too so no ones feelings are hurt. By the time the shirts are worn everyone in the grade knows they weren't invited from the 800 pictures that were posted. By Monday I think they're over it.

They really should not post pictures to events that would make others feel left out. That is very tacky.

Do you tell your kids to not post pictures from events too so no ones feelings are hurt. By the time the shirts are worn everyone in the grade knows they weren't invited from the 800 pictures that were posted. By Monday I think they're over it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

It's fine not to invite everyone. It is obnoxious to give out t-shirts and other things that rub it in people's faces. It also just sets the seeds for narcissism. No kid needs all his friends to have a t-shirt bragging they went to his bar mitzvah. If he's Barak Obama, then give out the t-shirts Obama earned the recognition. Having your parents spend thousands to celebrate your birthday in a ceremony that in Jewish tradition is supposed to be MODEST, is too much. It used to be about celebrating manhood not making a kid feel like a celebrity. Part of teaching our kids values is to have them THINK about other people's feelings.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

It's fine not to invite everyone. It is obnoxious to give out t-shirts and other things that rub it in people's faces. It also just sets the seeds for narcissism. No kid needs all his friends to have a t-shirt bragging they went to his bar mitzvah. If he's Barak Obama, then give out the t-shirts Obama earned the recognition. Having your parents spend thousands to celebrate your birthday in a ceremony that in Jewish tradition is supposed to be MODEST, is too much. It used to be about celebrating manhood not making a kid feel like a celebrity. Part of teaching our kids values is to have them THINK about other people's feelings.

+100
The extravagance of these celebrations has created a negative connotation to what it really means to be Bar/Bat mitzvah'd.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

It's fine not to invite everyone. It is obnoxious to give out t-shirts and other things that rub it in people's faces. It also just sets the seeds for narcissism. No kid needs all his friends to have a t-shirt bragging they went to his bar mitzvah. If he's Barak Obama, then give out the t-shirts Obama earned the recognition. Having your parents spend thousands to celebrate your birthday in a ceremony that in Jewish tradition is supposed to be MODEST, is too much. It used to be about celebrating manhood not making a kid feel like a celebrity. Part of teaching our kids values is to have them THINK about other people's feelings.

I grew up on Long Island in the 80's where it was very common to have 200-300 people at these events, where people rented a yacht for the afternoon into the evening, where kids regularly wore bar/bat mitzvah t-shirts.

It's really no big deal. Kids wore them under their Champion sweatshirts, we wore them when we needed a t-shirt for gym, whatever. We all grew up around this. I'm not a narcissist. It's not rubbing it in other kids faces. By that token nobody should let their teen have an iPhone or Adidas sneakers or anything that any other kid may feel bad about not having. My kid is poor. She gets some things and not others. Yes, a girl at her school travels to different countries during every single school break. But that girl is socially immature and isn't allowed to be in the classroom during s*x ed each year. She's not allowed to go anywhere without her mother.

Mix CD of your DS' favorite songs?

Anonymous wrote:OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

Read linked thread above.

Anonymous wrote:OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

It's fine not to invite everyone. It is obnoxious to give out t-shirts and other things that rub it in people's faces. It also just sets the seeds for narcissism. No kid needs all his friends to have a t-shirt bragging they went to his bar mitzvah. If he's Barak Obama, then give out the t-shirts Obama earned the recognition. Having your parents spend thousands to celebrate your birthday in a ceremony that in Jewish tradition is supposed to be MODEST, is too much. It used to be about celebrating manhood not making a kid feel like a celebrity. Part of teaching our kids values is to have them THINK about other people's feelings.

OMG are you kidding me? how about kids growing up and realize they are not going to get invited to everything and the parents telling them that that is life not some situation that requires some other 13 year old who wants his or her party favors to be a shirt to change their plans because some oversensitive kid who he doesn't even know.

I think you should only do this if everyone in the class is invited.

Glad you will re-think OP. It's bad enough kids have to deal with hearing about this stuff at school and knowing they weren't invited. They don't need an obnoxious reminder whenever someone sees a t-shirt. Plus, it just contributes to narcissism. I think we have gotten so far away from what Bat Mitsvahs should be about into this whole competition of who can have the coolest and most pricey party. It doesn't represent our religion well.

I went to one where we all got to take home Chinese takeout boxes of Mike and Ike's. Mike and Ike's has a gourmet line in all sorts of colors and they are delish.

That is way better than a t-shirt.

oye, I never even thought of this.... thx. will re-think

Ugh, please don't.

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/584926.page

We are going to have a bar mitzvah for our son and are going to give tv shirt giveaways. Can anyone recommend a graphic designer/artist who provides this service? Thanks