If it ain't needles, don't sweat it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's in college, stop snooping through her stuff. They are caffeine pills, probably for the all nighters that college kids do b.c they leave stuff to the last minute. Also, she is more than likely having sex...possibly with multiple partners. Did you go to college?

Snooping and trying to control her life as an adult isn't going to help her, and will probably just alienate your relationship with her. On the bright side, if that happens then your daughter can join the legions on DCUM (in a few years) that have terrible relations with their parents.

+100

+100,000,000

She's not drinking coffee but taking these instead, at the normal dose. Big. F'ing. Deal. There's nothing wrong with that. But there's a good chance you'll ruin her holidays and yours by confronting her about the pills. Seal the package back up and don't mention it. She's an adult. But if she knows you're snooping, you can kiss your relationship with her goodbye. She won't send stuff home anymore, she may not come back to visit, and she'll be super secretive about her behavior. That isn't what you want. What you want on this trip home is to reiterate to her how much you love her and how much you and DH support her - no matter what. Even if that doesn't mean a perfect 4.0. Show her love. Show her support. But do not confront her over something that is really, truly, nothing.

How old is your daughter? Did she start college early? I'm asking because this is in 'Tweens and Teens'. If she's an adult, you should learn to respect her privacy. She is an individual and free to make decisions. Caffeine isn't a drug. I used caffeine pills after all nighters, so I could get to class. I'm 50 now with no regrets about the caffeine pills!

It's standard dose caffeine pills, hardly more than a cup of coffee. Wouldn't be a big deal in my book, but the casual way you just snoop in your adult offspring's life might be. She can't even get mail without you opening it and deciding whether to "confront" her over it? My parents pulled that sort of stuff, and it's among the major reasons we had basically no relationship for roughly 7 years (yes among other problems, but the complete lack of privacy and any sort of agency over my own life was a huge deal).

Anonymous wrote:She's in college, stop snooping through her stuff. They are caffeine pills, probably for the all nighters that college kids do b.c they leave stuff to the last minute. Also, she is more than likely having sex...possibly with multiple partners. Did you go to college?

Snooping and trying to control her life as an adult isn't going to help her, and will probably just alienate your relationship with her. On the bright side, if that happens then your daughter can join the legions on DCUM (in a few years) that have terrible relations with their parents.

+100

OP I hope you realize that 200g is a pretty standard dose for caffeine pills...100 and 200 are both regular doses.

She's in college, stop snooping through her stuff. They are caffeine pills, probably for the all nighters that college kids do b.c they leave stuff to the last minute. Also, she is more than likely having sex...possibly with multiple partners. Did you go to college?

Snooping and trying to control her life as an adult isn't going to help her, and will probably just alienate your relationship with her. On the bright side, if that happens then your daughter can join the legions on DCUM (in a few years) that have terrible relations with their parents.

I wouldn't freak out over caffeine pills.

Ignore the "violation of privacy" freaks.

So now you know your DD is risking her health to fulfill your need to have a child at HPY.

Time to have a talk about what is important in life, unless you guys also risk your health for prestige and money. Then you high five her for doing what it takes.

One big mug of coffee can have 200 mg of caffeine. I wouldn't overreact and you shouldn't open her mail! My daughter is 25 btw. I haven't opened her mail in years.

OP here - I was concerned about the pharmaceutical return address label (thought maybe it was a front for buying illegal drugs). Maybe these aren't illegal but she was buying drugs nonetheless

Confront. This could be a gateway and who knows if she's combining these with alcohol???

I'd be more concerned about the huge betrayal of trust Youve just exhibited. Why would you open a package that wasn't addressed to you?

Why did you open her mail?! You do realize that's illegal, right?

My DD is a junior at a top university (HYPS) and is coming home for winter break.
But, two days ago, we got a package addressed to her from a pharmaceutical company and when DH and I opened it we found a massive bottle of caffeine pills. Not even the regular dose, double dose 200 mg ones.
DD has insisted since high school that she doesn't even drink coffee, and, in addition to being worried about the pills, now I can't help but wondering if she's lying about some of her other behaviors at school (drugs, sex, excessive partying, etc).

I want to confront her about it, but DH thinks I should just put the pills in her room and not mention anything.

Thoughts?