Thank you, everybody!

Self-advocacy is a great skill to learn early on. Check out Ben Foss's book "The Dyslexia Empowerment Plan". He's profoundly dyslexic yet completed an MBA and founded the non-profit Headstrong Nation. He talks a lot about self-advocacy as a necessary skill and has great examples.

I'm an adult with dyslexia - agree that the focus is on how to help you daughter understand she learns differently & how to get the right support to help her with it. This is a great book about it...

http://dyslexia.yale.edu/book_Overcoming.html

We never kept it a secret. DS is very good at math and his classmates know he is smart.

My DD is in 3rd grade at a parochial school. There is no shame and she tells everyone. It is empowering. Additionally, the school will do things that will help her and her friends will notice so it is better to be upfront. She just learns differently-they are just as smart. Good luck.

Oh, and OP: I assume your daughter actually is quite bright, right? If she wasn't she probably wouldn't have muddled through till 3rd without a diagnosis. The other kids know she's smart. They see it in class. Worry about what your daughter thinks of herself, which may be pretty harsh. I am the pp, and my son thought he was stupid and lazy before he was diagnosed. Why wouldn't he? He couldn't do this simple thing every one else could do. He worked so darn hard, and he is so smart, that it was just heart breaking to see. It ate him up inside, and he did everything in his power to hide his struggle with learning, and it came out in anger and tears and learning refusal. Once he had a name for this thing that had dogged him he was a much, much happier kid. And he accepted help.

Hope things look up for your kiddo soon! I'm sure they will.

Our son was diagnosed in 5th grade. He was relieved to know what was causing his struggles with reading. With that said he asked us to wait to tell certain family/friends until he was ready. He worked out what he liked to say to people and once he was comfortable we all started discussing it. What I realized was there are many misconceptions about it and being informed as parents and having our son knowledgeable helped all of us feel comfortable talking about it. Most people he told listened then then went about being boys. Its been a little harder getting the teacher's all on board with his needs now that he is in middle school. He was given provisions for not being graded on spelling...and yet he's being graded on spelling.....

Oh, and OP: I assume your daughter actually is quite bright, right? If she wasn't she probably wouldn't have muddled through till 3rd without a diagnosis. The other kids know she's smart. They see it in class. Worry about what your daughter thinks of herself, which may be pretty harsh. I am the pp, and my son thought he was stupid and lazy before he was diagnosed. Why wouldn't he? He couldn't do this simple thing every one else could do. He worked so darn hard, and he is so smart, that it was just heart breaking to see. It ate him up inside, and he did everything in his power to hide his struggle with learning, and it came out in anger and tears and learning refusal. Once he had a name for this thing that had dogged him he was a much, much happier kid. And he accepted help.

Hope things look up for your kiddo soon! I'm sure they will.

My son is in 4th grade, and was diagnosed in 1st. He has always been open about his dyslexia, and will tell people about it if asked. It was very empowering for him to know what was causing his difficulties and then tell people "yeah, my brain works differently than most people's. X is hard for me, but I really like doing Y." Now in 4th it comes up a lot less, as his reading is now within the normal range. But there are still isolated skills that he struggles with (reading out loud, memorizing math facts) that is still helps to be able to say "its going to take me more time to master that."

Socially it has been a total non-issue. I think there are social implications to disclosing ASD or ADHD, but not dyslexia. Since it impacts just learning and not behavior I think there is very little stigma.

ok, thanks. That was my instinct, but just wanted to make sure I wasn't off on that. . .

No need to keep it a secret.

So, my 3rd grader was just diagnosed with dyslexia. She goes to a parochial school in the Arlington Diocese, and we have a parents' secret FB page for parents to ask all sorts of questions and share info. I want to know how helpful the Learning Resource Center is to this special need and would like to get tips and btdt advice from other parents. Asked my daughter if she would like it or mind it if I posted this on the parents' FB page for this type of info, or if she would prefer me to keep it private, b/c I want to respect her wishes on this. Daughter said, "Post it, we need info." But, I guess, before I do that, I am just asking HERE, from parents who may be a bit further down the road on this than we are: should I in fact keep this more under wraps, socially? Would word "get around" and kids, I don't know, think she's not smart, or tease her, or whatever? It's a very kind school. People don't tease or bully. But I suppose, I don't want people who are not aware of what dyslexia really is thinking that my daughter is -- and convincing her somehow -- that she is not SMART. Advice?? I just want to make sure that, in gathering information this way, I don't open us up to some unforeseen circumstances or unintended consequences. Does this make sense?