Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read and post all the time in the regular forum but I have never once been in the explicit forum.

Ditto. I'm in almost every other forum except 50+ and gardening, but I never even read the explicit forum, even before the sign-in requirement.

Cool stories, bros.

Anonymous wrote:I read and post all the time in the regular forum but I have never once been in the explicit forum.

Ditto. I'm in almost every other forum except 50+ and gardening, but I never even read the explicit forum, even before the sign-in requirement.

What I noticed is that the people with user names gang up and are mean to anyone they don't like. They became the bullies they were trying to squash. Sad. Same ten or so people post with an occasional pop in from someone else. I was against user names, but everyone jumped on the bandwagon. Be careful what you wish for. Dead dead dead dead done.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That forum really helped me to have the courage to talk to my spouse about a number of things. It was a good place, in many ways.

Now people are afraid to bring things up or reply to things. Sucks.

Agree, I got some really good feedback over there on a sensitive topic between me and my DW.

Anyone know a good place to talk about these issues anonymously since the explicit site here is dead?

Reddit? Yahoo questions?

You can also have multiple screen names on dcum. If you post something, you'll get answers. But maybe 10 instead of 50.

People like me never drop in there anymore, let alone post. I used to look in once in a while and answer questions about sexuality. I'm older and there seem to be a fair number of younger people confused by what porn depicts, and that's what they believe is real, which is a great disservice to women.

Maybe nine out of ten people would read the forum and be looking for fantasy material or someone to flirt with, but maybe that tenth person would have a real concern, and might pick up something useful. And next time her partner insisted some boring, degrading act was what "all" the women loved and that she was abnormal, she might be somewhat empowered by having read that her feelings are valid.

Anonymous wrote:That forum really helped me to have the courage to talk to my spouse about a number of things. It was a good place, in many ways.

Now people are afraid to bring things up or reply to things. Sucks.

Agree, I got some really good feedback over there on a sensitive topic between me and my DW.

Anyone know a good place to talk about these issues anonymously since the explicit site here is dead?

Anonymous wrote:It's gross anyway. Bunch of perverts.

OP here, please be careful what you say, don't get this thread moved to explicit where it will die!

I have noticed that the character of the explicit forum has changed since the username requirement, or perhaps more accurately, one particular type of thread has dominated where before different types of conversations coexisted.

The explicit forum was always about explicit discussion of sex, of course, so if you don't want that then the forum wouldn't interest you. But the conversations were broader-ranging and maybe more nuanced before. I feel like now, the 1-900 chat type of thread dominates, as in "hey ladies, what do you think about [sex act XYZ]", and then the next PP replies with "hey OP, I'd really love to [sex act XYZ] with you" etc etc etc

Anonymous wrote:It's gross anyway. Bunch of perverts.

Sorry you hate sex so much.

That forum really helped me to have the courage to talk to my spouse about a number of things. It was a good place, in many ways.

Now people are afraid to bring things up or reply to things. Sucks.

It's gross anyway. Bunch of perverts.

I agree. I won't return.

I used to post over there with a user name before it was required, always anonymous here. Explicit is dead now, which is a shame

It's pathetic now. Dead dead DEAD!

I read and post all the time in the regular forum but I have never once been in the explicit forum.

Subject says it all. I can't post this in the explicit forum obviously, with the new username policy.

The decision to go to usernames only was made quickly and I wonder if anyone regrets it.

I understand there was some anonymous trolling that was upsetting some of the people with usernames.

But whereas most of DCUM is a clearing house for hundreds or thousands of opinions on a topic, the explicit forum is now just the same 20 people talking in a chat room (for which there are many other available options on the internet).

Previously it was fun to imagine that the person posting in explicit was the same person posting in the schools and other forums, whereas now I have the distinct impression that the explicit forum is its own world and there's little overlap between it and the rest of DCUM (not zero, but little).

There are many people who are uninterested in the exposure of a username but who might want to post the occasional experience buried in an active thread. After all, the main selling point of DCUM has always been that it has long attracted the kind of people who would not be caught dead in the usual online chat room, who would never have their own blog, who would never make their facebook posts public. Basically professional people with reputations to protect who aren't interested in having an online avatar/personality but are willing to post anonymously.

I guess maybe Jeff will move my post to website feedback but I posted it here because I figure there are some people in this forum who can relate. I have noticed that previously, if someone had a borderline-explicit topic they would err on the side of posting in explicit, whereas now they will err on the side of posting in non-explicit. This, added to the drop in traffic in explicit, is a sign that many of the posters in the explicit forum have left. The result is that the explicit forum used to have threads that were interesting with a mix of non-explicit commentary and NSFW language. Whereas now those types of threads take place in non-explicit with people censoring their language, and most threads in the explicit forum read like a transcript of a 1-900 phone call.

Ok, that is what I wanted to say. Curious to hear what other people think.