Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get your daughter out of that teacher's class and report the teacher for misconduct. It's too late now, but I would not have shown my daughter or told my daughter about a post going around on Facebook about her. How horrible for your daughter to know that she is fodder for gossip among your friends. Also, I would not attack my child because of some gossip on FB. Give your child the benefit of the doubt. If there truly was a problem with your child in school, the school would have notified you. It truly is despicable what that teacher did. She should be fired.

Absolutely all of this.

And I really think there was a better way for you to ask your child about this without showing her. That was cruel.

It doesn't matter what your child did. It is unacceptable to publicly complain about students let alone publicly call them out by name. Even if she is a pain, difficult, what ever, its not the point. I'd demand my child not be placed in that class or transfer schools.

Anonymous wrote:Get your daughter out of that teacher's class and report the teacher for misconduct. It's too late now, but I would not have shown my daughter or told my daughter about a post going around on Facebook about her. How horrible for your daughter to know that she is fodder for gossip among your friends. Also, I would not attack my child because of some gossip on FB. Give your child the benefit of the doubt. If there truly was a problem with your child in school, the school would have notified you. It truly is despicable what that teacher did. She should be fired.

Absolutely all of this.

And I really think there was a better way for you to ask your child about this without showing her. That was cruel.

Get your daughter out of that teacher's class and report the teacher for misconduct. It's too late now, but I would not have shown my daughter or told my daughter about a post going around on Facebook about her. How horrible for your daughter to know that she is fodder for gossip among your friends. Also, I would not attack my child because of some gossip on FB. Give your child the benefit of the doubt. If there truly was a problem with your child in school, the school would have notified you. It truly is despicable what that teacher did. She should be fired.

Yeah, I agree with the PPs. Now that your daughter has seen the post she absolutely shouldn't be in that teachers classroom this year. Even if you could have somehow gotten to the bottom of it with the teacher and principal, there's no way your daughter will be successful in that classroom now that she knows the teacher doesn't want her there.
Go to the principal, show her the post, and ask her to switch your daughters class before the school year starts.

And then do everything in your power to make sure that your daughter knows that you are always always always in her corner, even if she is acting like a little twit.

I really feel bad for your DD that you showed her that. That is something really awful for a 13 year old to deal with - rejection and public humiliation. I think you and the school need to do some serious damage control to turn this around for your DD or her feelings of worthlessness will turn into bad behavior or depression. Kids this age are very fragile even if they show a tough exterior. Give her a hug now & tell her it's not her fault.

I agree with the pp. I would have your daughter moved out of this teachers class. It was completely unprofessional and uncalled for. As for why this teacher feels this way it could be little things your daughter does not worthy of notes but enough to get on a teacher's nerves. My first thoughts are always questioning the teacher's decisions, etc. It really could just be a personality thing versus a behavior thing.

Also, maybe it's just because my kids are a bit younger, but I don't know if showing her the post was the right choice. It seems like you aren't on her side at all, by asking her over and over again to the point of her being upset and then showing her a post that her teacher spoke poorly of her on social media. I think your daughter needs to feel like you are on her side, because right now she feels like her mom isn't trusting her and her teacher doesn't like her...that has to be a hard spot for a 13 year old girl. Anyways, perhaps I'm reading too far into your description of the situation.

I really do wish you the best in the situation, it's a tough spot to be in all around.

Anonymous wrote:Go sit down with the principal. Your kid should not be in that woman's class.

And that teacher should be immediately fired. I don't care how much of a shit your kid is, the teacher's behavior was out of line. You don't post that shit on social media. How dare her.

You need to screen shot that and forward it to the principal and let them know that one of their teachers is publicly bitching about a student at the school. Tell him that your daughter saw the FB post and is very upset to already have a bad reputation with a teacher even before school has started. Ask that she be moved to a different teacher.

I think the problem is with the teacher, NOT your daughter.

How terrible. Even if your daughter was a horrific kid, that is just unprofessional. Your poor child.

Anonymous wrote:Go sit down with the principal. Your kid should not be in that woman's class.

I agree

Oh, OP, I am so sorry! You should definitely look into what is happening with your daughter to cause this reaction. However, if I were you, I would have serious concerns about the culture of your daughter's school if teachers are posting about children on Facebook. Of course teachers have preferences and discuss those preferences, but posting to social media about children is beyond the pale. Maybe your daughter's behavior is a reflection of favoritism she's experienced at this school. What terrible judgment. Yikes!

Go sit down with the principal. Your kid should not be in that woman's class.

As a former classroom teacher and current admin, I can't believe a teacher would post that. That is so completely unprofessional. I agree I would want to know why your daughter has that reputation, but I would also get her out of that class immediately. You don't want her going into a class where the teacher has a negative attitude towards her before the year even starts. If anyone pushes back- show them the post. For anyone to use a student's name on social media is completely outrageous.

Maybe she is just a cliquey mean girl? Meaning she has a chip on her shoulder and is unapproachable. Some girls do all their work and are good students, they are just mean to the teacher in little ways that you wouldn't write up or call home about, but they undermine the teacher.

I was the daughter and granddaughter of teachers; I'm definitely not the sort of parent to think that my kids are always right or always perfect, and the teacher always too harsh. In fact, I'm pretty demanding on standards for grades and behavior at school. My middle school DD has always gotten A's or B's on the report cards sent home, never had detention, and never had any discipline problems that we were informed of. But now I've got a situation that has me utterly perplexed for what to do about it.

A friend just sent me screenshots of a Facebook post in which one of DD's teachers for the upcoming year complains about having DD and 3 other students in her class. The teacher has our (fairly small) school listed as one of her "networks" on FB, and although only first names were mentioned in the post my DD is the only one with her somewhat uncommon first name in the entire school yearbook, so I'm nearly certain the post was by that teacher and about my kid. It looks like the teacher intended to send the message just to one of her friends, but something must have gone wrong because the friend who sent me the picture of the post was not the named friend to whom the post was addressed, and my friend confirmed that the post is visible to both her and her daughter, which suggests it's publicly available. I'm all for people venting to friends if needed, and if my kid did something to earn a bad reputation amongst the teaching staff then she is just going to have to live with the consequences, however I do wish it hadn't been so public. But that's not the part of this I have any influence over. My part of the problem is to deal with my kid being apparently the bad kid.

I don't like the idea that my kid has a reputation already for being one of the problem students. Especially just starting the year, that's going to give her more hurdles to overcome. And I don't want to have "that kid". So, I sat DD down and I asked her... is there anything you need to tell me about how you have been acting at school? She said no. I asked, if I call the school and ask to see your disciplinary record or your transcripts, are there going to be any surprises I should know about? She again said no, and was confused and offended as to why I was asking. So I showed her the post I had received (I don't have Facebook, and she's not getting one until after the first quarter of school... she just turned 13 this summer). I told her, "Look, I don't know why, but this is what's going around about you. I don't like it. I didn't raise you to be the problem student and I don't think you want that reputation either. So if you can think of what you may have done to be the kind of student a teacher doesn't want, I want you to tell me what's going on and then I need you to commit to changing it this year because that's unacceptable." DD still remained adamant that she had no clue why this teacher dislikes her and she seemed quite upset about it.

Based on all evidence I have, I'm inclined to believe DD that she's not doing anything specific to be a problem student. But she's still got at least one academic teacher who has publicly named her as a student she dreads having. So where do we go from here in order for my kid to have a good year, be successful, and not further aggravate the teacher? Should I ask for a conference fairly soon after school starts and try to address whatever the problem is? I'm inclined to think that DD is at an age where she needs to handle these things, but on the other hand it's a somewhat strange situation. Just ignore it? WWYD?