Yes, look for the generally overlooked nerdy men, maybe prematurely balding, etc. I think they try harder because they don't have women falling for them as regularly and don't take women for granted as much. You might be surprised to find that one of them will meet your meaningful relationship requirements in spades AND may even turn out to be amazing in bed, which is a nice bonus. I could not be happier.

I have a good husband. He's a nerd, a little tense, infuriatingly smart, not horrible with the finances (but not bad), not terrific with the fix-it stuff (but better than me). Loves his kids, seems to love me. A little chubby and going grey, but not the chubbiest guy out there. Our sex life is not the worst (2-3x/week) but not the best (could be more passion in there) but it passes the sniff test.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a good husband. I'm a nerd, laid back, smart, curious, love my kids, love my wife, have a small town lawyer's gig, and coach the kids sports teams. I'm quick with a joke. I'm a little skinny and going bald, but my wife doesn't seem to mind. Our sex life could be better, but it's not awful and we're working on it now that the kids are getting older. I suck at home improvement but am decent at managing the finances. My favorite part of the day is walking the dogs with my wife. Not sure what else to say.

You sound like a catch! Tell your wife DCUM thinks so.

I'm a good husband. I'm a nerd, laid back, smart, curious, love my kids, love my wife, have a small town lawyer's gig, and coach the kids sports teams. I'm quick with a joke. I'm a little skinny and going bald, but my wife doesn't seem to mind. Our sex life could be better, but it's not awful and we're working on it now that the kids are getting older. I suck at home improvement but am decent at managing the finances. My favorite part of the day is walking the dogs with my wife. Not sure what else to say.

Aww these are great stories. Thanks op

I have a great husband. We both WOH and he goes in early so he can come home early and hang with our baby from 4:30 until bedtime. He was great during my pregnancy and the years we kept trying and when we had a couple health scares. Very supportive, dropped everything and did everything while I was recovering. Currently playing with the baby on the couch, lifting her and making her laugh. he waited until I it my deive back pp and didn't pressure me into sex. We tried a couple times and it was awful. Much better now and he tells me how much he missed me.
He's smart and funny and very kind but not a pushover. He works out and has great muscles. He does all the finances and budgets but is ok with me spending whatever within reason.
He's a lot dorky but it's always interesting with him and I find him sexy.

Of all the happy marriages I have seen, it seems that the key is to not have any preconceived notions about what a "perfect" spouse would be.

In my marriage, for example, my dh is an absolute gem. He is kind, very resourceful, very sweet, very smart, funny, mischievous, sexy and just such an overall good guy. Its important to understand that even though I am very thankful for him, he does not meet all the requirements of my "dream man list" haha. These are as follows:

- He is not in greatshape. He has a dadbod. No ripling muscles or athletlic frame here.
- He does not have a fancy high powered hot shot career.
- He is introverted and kind of dorky. Many girls would pass him up if they saw him on the street.

When I met hm, I didn't even realize I needed the qualities he had versus the qualities I thought I wanted.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is amazing and we are very happy. We have been together for over ten years, married for eight, with two kids. He does at least half the childcare and housework, we both WOTH. He is caring, sensitive, confident, and hilarious. We are really each other's best friend, although we each have friends outside of each other. He is really supportive of my ideas and goals, and I support his.

Honestly our story is kind of boring, but we are really happy and fulfilled. I think that it's such a cliche to say this, but it's true, that I believe we each make each other a better person. He softens me and makes me less harsh with others and myself, and I challenge him to be more adventurous.

I'm the guy in this same marriage. We've been together 15 years/married 13. We were just commenting today about how we're each other's best friend. I'll add that we both stay as fit/attractive as possible for ourselves and the other. We have a fulfilling sex life. Sorry if that sounds braggy or whatever but I see a lot of posts on DCUM about non-existant sex lives, etc. Anyway, if you believe everything you read on DCUM you could end up with the impression that a great marriage isn't possible. Not true.

NP- we are going on 15 years. We truely are each other's best friend and partner. There are many good marriages out there- chin up!

They're out there. I have one. But you have to be open minded to recognize them. They may not look or sound or behave exactly as you had imagined. They may not be what you thought was your type.

Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is amazing and we are very happy. We have been together for over ten years, married for eight, with two kids. He does at least half the childcare and housework, we both WOTH. He is caring, sensitive, confident, and hilarious. We are really each other's best friend, although we each have friends outside of each other. He is really supportive of my ideas and goals, and I support his.

Honestly our story is kind of boring, but we are really happy and fulfilled. I think that it's such a cliche to say this, but it's true, that I believe we each make each other a better person. He softens me and makes me less harsh with others and myself, and I challenge him to be more adventurous.

I'm the guy in this same marriage. We've been together 15 years/married 13. We were just commenting today about how we're each other's best friend. I'll add that we both stay as fit/attractive as possible for ourselves and the other. We have a fulfilling sex life. Sorry if that sounds braggy or whatever but I see a lot of posts on DCUM about non-existant sex lives, etc. Anyway, if you believe everything you read on DCUM you could end up with the impression that a great marriage isn't possible. Not true.

Correct. You're all just failing at life.

Hubris is seen as dangerous in many cultures for a reason

Op, it's all a matter of perspective. Your glass will always be half full or half empty, your choice. No person is perfect, and no relationship is perfect. Where there are two people, there's conflict. It's how you handle it that makes the relationship work or not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is amazing and we are very happy. We have been together for over ten years, married for eight, with two kids. He does at least half the childcare and housework, we both WOTH. He is caring, sensitive, confident, and hilarious. We are really each other's best friend, although we each have friends outside of each other. He is really supportive of my ideas and goals, and I support his.

Honestly our story is kind of boring, but we are really happy and fulfilled. I think that it's such a cliche to say this, but it's true, that I believe we each make each other a better person. He softens me and makes me less harsh with others and myself, and I challenge him to be more adventurous.

I'm the guy in this same marriage. We've been together 15 years/married 13. We were just commenting today about how we're each other's best friend. I'll add that we both stay as fit/attractive as possible for ourselves and the other. We have a fulfilling sex life. Sorry if that sounds braggy or whatever but I see a lot of posts on DCUM about non-existant sex lives, etc. Anyway, if you believe everything you read on DCUM you could end up with the impression that a great marriage isn't possible. Not true.

Correct. You're all just failing at life.

Anonymous wrote:My husband is amazing and we are very happy. We have been together for over ten years, married for eight, with two kids. He does at least half the childcare and housework, we both WOTH. He is caring, sensitive, confident, and hilarious. We are really each other's best friend, although we each have friends outside of each other. He is really supportive of my ideas and goals, and I support his.

Honestly our story is kind of boring, but we are really happy and fulfilled. I think that it's such a cliche to say this, but it's true, that I believe we each make each other a better person. He softens me and makes me less harsh with others and myself, and I challenge him to be more adventurous.

I'm the guy in this same marriage. We've been together 15 years/married 13. We were just commenting today about how we're each other's best friend. I'll add that we both stay as fit/attractive as possible for ourselves and the other. We have a fulfilling sex life. Sorry if that sounds braggy or whatever but I see a lot of posts on DCUM about non-existant sex lives, etc. Anyway, if you believe everything you read on DCUM you could end up with the impression that a great marriage isn't possible. Not true.

My husband is amazing and we are very happy. We have been together for over ten years, married for eight, with two kids. He does at least half the childcare and housework, we both WOTH. He is caring, sensitive, confident, and hilarious. We are really each other's best friend, although we each have friends outside of each other. He is really supportive of my ideas and goals, and I support his.

Honestly our story is kind of boring, but we are really happy and fulfilled. I think that it's such a cliche to say this, but it's true, that I believe we each make each other a better person. He softens me and makes me less harsh with others and myself, and I challenge him to be more adventurous.

I was feeling a little sad hearing about failed relationships. I'm single right now, but it would be nice to hear from and about husbands who love their wives, are happily married, don't cheat, and are grateful for their family. Sometimes with all the negative stories, I feel like those are the unicorns.