I've had cats my entire life, and it sounds like your cat is punishing you for leaving him. Will he stop peeing on the couch now that you're home? If so, then he's angry. Also, have you ruled out a UTI? stress can cause them, and some cats get stressed when their owner is away.

Net time you go on vacation, if the cat is still alive, you may consider having a live in house/pet sitter so that he's not lonely. That may help.

A couple of things:

An option for the couch (ask me how I know!)--something waterproof--maybe adjusted mattress pad + fleece.

Also have you considered just keeping the area rugs so that he has somewhere to voice his opinion? Get very small, washable ones and then just face the fact that you'll be washing them a lot.

Have you tried washing with the enzyme stuff? I have one cat who will make a beeline for anything has the slightest whiff of "peed here before".

Also +1 to the idea of confining him only when you're out, and then choose the most pleasant spot, even if it's smaller.

OP again. DH said he is willing to live with the plastic and see how that works. I have a woolite spray that disinfects pet mess so I suppose I can wipe down the plastic each time he goes on it. Though i didn't realize my cat had peed again within the last hour and I put my knee in it. So disgusting.
I don't fault my DH for being yucked out.

Maybe husband is not an asshole. Maybe husband doesn't want a 1k piece of furniture ruined and a house that reeks of cat pee. Totally reasonable.

Can't DH be outvoted by the rest of the family? Can you put a baby gate or barrier up to at least keep him in the living room by the window he likes? You will hate yourself forever if you break his heart by locking him up. Plastic on the couch isn't such a big deal. And it does seem to be the stress of vacation - separation - that causes this for the cat. So the solution cannot be to banish him ....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work in animal welfare, and I think it would be kinder to euthanize your cat than to leave him locked in a laundry room.

If you have truly exhausted every option - speaking with your vet, and perhaps also a behaviorist - and your family is unwilling to live with the pee and poop in the wrong places, then I don't see much other choice. You can try to rehome your cat, to a family who understands that he has special needs now. But that isn't easy to do.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Frankly, your husband is an asshole. But you probably already know that.

"To a family that understands he has special needs"?? We've been dealing with this for 5 years. Our home is basically stripped bare because I've been trying to prevent having to keep him separated. We are living with plastic wrap on our sofas. We are the farthest thing from cruel. Rehoming isn't an option - I can't imagine anyone will be more patient with this cat than we are. Plus we are his family.

The idea of euthanize him breaks my heart...I just can't.

And my husband isn't an asshole. He's not a cat person but he has been so patient. He's been willing to live with our house upside down because he empathizes with my distress and understands how much I live this cat.

You really think he's an asshole for not being willing to live with pee and poop on our sofas? For not wanting our kids to live that way?

Anonymous wrote:I work in animal welfare, and I think it would be kinder to euthanize your cat than to leave him locked in a laundry room.

If you have truly exhausted every option - speaking with your vet, and perhaps also a behaviorist - and your family is unwilling to live with the pee and poop in the wrong places, then I don't see much other choice. You can try to rehome your cat, to a family who understands that he has special needs now. But that isn't easy to do.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Frankly, your husband is an asshole. But you probably already know that.

"To a family that understands he has special needs"?? We've been dealing with this for 5 years. Our home is basically stripped bare because I've been trying to prevent having to keep him separated. We are living with plastic wrap on our sofas. We are the farthest thing from cruel. Rehoming isn't an option - I can't imagine anyone will be more patient with this cat than we are. Plus we are his family.

The idea of euthanize him breaks my heart...I just can't.

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is cruel. What kind of life will he have? What quality?

He is 15. I know it's hard to even consider. But, if you're going to make him live like that, IMO the most humane thing would be to put him down.

We had to do it with our 14 year old dog. It hurt like hell, it's been over a year and I still miss him. But he had no quality of life anymore.

IF you insist on one or the other, give him the laundry room with a small window. Alternatively, if he only does it when you're away..? Put him in there when you leave..?

I've thought of that - putting him in there overnight (which is when he seems to do it the most) or when I'm not home.

I work in animal welfare, and I think it would be kinder to euthanize your cat than to leave him locked in a laundry room.

If you have truly exhausted every option - speaking with your vet, and perhaps also a behaviorist - and your family is unwilling to live with the pee and poop in the wrong places, then I don't see much other choice. You can try to rehome your cat, to a family who understands that he has special needs now. But that isn't easy to do.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Frankly, your husband is an asshole. But you probably already know that.

OP, this is cruel. What kind of life will he have? What quality?

He is 15. I know it's hard to even consider. But, if you're going to make him live like that, IMO the most humane thing would be to put him down.

We had to do it with our 14 year old dog. It hurt like hell, it's been over a year and I still miss him. But he had no quality of life anymore.

IF you insist on one or the other, give him the laundry room with a small window. Alternatively, if he only does it when you're away..? Put him in there when you leave..?

Anonymous wrote:Honestly OP car needs more human interaction. That's what he's telling you. You should out him down before you banish him to a laundry room or windowless basement. What will to do when he starts peeing on the baseboards?

Also, he gets plenty of interaction. I only work weekends right now.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly OP car needs more human interaction. That's what he's telling you. You should out him down before you banish him to a laundry room or windowless basement. What will to do when he starts peeing on the baseboards?

He's never peed on hard floor, only soft surfaces.

OP again - only other option is to keep a plastic drop cloth over the sofa, and just change it if he pees on it (and hope his behavior calms down in time now that we're home from vacation). Would that be totally nuts? I figure he has a year or two max left to live.

No more pets for us after this, sadly.

Honestly OP car needs more human interaction. That's what he's telling you. You should out him down before you banish him to a laundry room or windowless basement. What will to do when he starts peeing on the baseboards?

My cat is 15 years old and we've been battling his peeing outside the litter box for about 5 years. We've had long stretches of success, but every time we go on vacation he regresses and starts doing it again. I love my cat and am a person who believes in caring for him as best as I can until the end of his life - putting him down has never been an option, and never will be. But we're kind of at the end of our rope.

We started off closing all the bedroom doors so he couldn't pee in the beds, and that worked well for a long time. Then, after vacations he would pee on certain rugs, until I removed them one by one. As of last summer, we have zero rugs down - not even an entry mat. But that was okay, I was willing to deal with that - he's elderly and it was fine. There were no more pee incidents for a good long time and all was well.

Well, we just got back from a week away (cat sitter came once a day) and he started peeing in our den sofa. I actually put a plastic drop cloth on it and he peed and pooped on that last night. My DH has hit his limit - he is not willing to live with pee and poop on our sofa and I agree. He is demanding that our cat live in the laundry room where his litter boxes are, or downstairs in the basement. But it breaks my heart - my cat is 15 and very attached to me and the kids - and gets very lonely (which is why the peeing outside of the litter box started in the first place). He will be miserable.

He loves to sit by our sliding door in a sun beam and look outside - that's what he does all day. Our basement is unfinished and dark, with no windows, though it's larger than our laundry room. But the laundry room does have a small window and I could set up a perch for him to climb up so he could look outside. But either way, he'd be unhappy.

I realize it's the only way, but I'm feeling so guilty and so bad for my sweet cat - my kids and I love him despite his a-hole behavior and he's been our companion for 15 years. He's had health issues and the vet calls him a "miracle cat" because he just keeps on going. I guess I'm worried if we separate him he'll go downhill. But we've tried cat attract litter, keeping it very clean, giving him 4 boxes to choose from.

Which room would you choose if you were me - smaller, unfinished laundry room with a small window or larger unfinished basement with no window?
Any ideas for what I can do to make the space cozy for him? Should I feel bad about this? I'm just so bummed out.