My wife was when we got married. We're probably about the same now. Maybe I'm a little better looking - who cares?

The power has always been tilted in her direction because she has an extremely strong Type A personaity. I'm more of a peacemaker and only Type A at the office.

The craziest one holds the power. Attractiveness has nothing to do with it.

Girlfriend here. I think we are equal in looks although I'm 10 years older than my boyfriend (I'm always told I look younger, get carded everywhere, etc.). We make about the same amount of money although my BF has more opportunities for overtime pay and stuff like that. I don't think we have a power imbalance, either. We split our bills equally and both pull our weight with household responsibilities with little argument and almost never needing to ask the other if they'd do something. We just mesh.

We have each been the more attractive partner. He earns all the money, but I think we are pretty equally matched in terms of "power." We have our own strengths and take the lead in those arenas. For example, I run the finances- all of them.

Anonymous wrote:Equally attractive.

I make more money.

Nobody holds more power.... Because I am easy going but I would if it came down to it.

I am the Wife.

Same here. On the attractiveness scale I'd say we're both about 7's. I have more power when it comes to finances, but DH knows I rely on him a lot emotionally and would be lost without him.

Equally attractive.

I make more money.

Nobody holds more power.... Because I am easy going but I would if it came down to it.

I am the Wife.

Every relationship is different, in terms of who holds the power. Has nothing to do with attractiveness.

Why do people ask these questions? Unbelievably dumb.

Dh is more attractive in terms of conventional gender standards - if we divorced, he'd find someone new in 5 minutes - but he doesn't feel that attractive so he doesn't realize this. Plus if we got divorced I would not be interested in getting married again. So I still hold more power in terms of who needs the other one more.

I think my DH and I are about equal in attractiveness, which is great! I've been both the better looking partner and the less good looking partner in the past, and even ideal imho.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me guess? The more attractive one is more powerful?

Wow. Riveting.

Omg, how did you guess You're so smart. Thanks for not answering the question!!!

That's not really power. It sounds like he cares about you.

Anonymous wrote:Let me guess? The more attractive one is more powerful?

Wow. Riveting.

Omg, how did you guess You're so smart. Thanks for not answering the question!!!

My bf is much more conventionally attractive than I am. I hold the power. How do I know? I broke up with him once, and he cried.

Let me guess? The more attractive one is more powerful?

Wow. Riveting.

Who's more attractive and who holds the power in your relationship? I have a hypothesis that these are linked. Please state if you are DH or DW, or GF or BF.