OP here. Thanks, all, for the practical tips and helpful insights. I learned a lot here (for instance, I'd never heard of College Confidential).
I just want my kid to have options. I'm not sold on a private - DH went to a state school and did fine. But it was disheartening to realize that I wouldn't be able to afford to send my kid to the college I attended or many other private schools, based on the rising sticker prices and the lack of financial aid. It's nice to hear that there are solutions and that some private schools do offer some merit aid.

I agree w several. Why are you so focused so early on private college? You have no idea what their interests will be at that time, nor the school which offers the best fit. What happens if your child goes to an out-of-state state school?
Hey, college is wildly expensive. I am pretty sure there has been no one whom has OVERSAVED for college. You haven't saved enough. So, given that fact, you need to either work harder, and increase HHI, via promo, new job, 2nd job. You can also cut back your spending, and save more. 3rd, how smart and intelligent your kid is will be a huge factory in terms of any aid. The fourth variable is the cost of the school: be it public or private, the cost of every college will be higher in a few years than it is now. If you are shocked by even the current costs, well, that is why there is such a current debate in politics on runaway school costs, student loans, etc.

Teach your kid German!

You save up $100k by the time your kid is in college. 25k per year.

You then slash your expenses by 35k per year to make up the difference.

Alternately, get your kid dual citizenship of another country with good universities and cheap tuition for citizens.

^^^PP here. You can also, of course, send your child to a public college or university, if that works for her. Our child would be lost at a large school, but YMMV.

Anonymous wrote:I'm beginning to try to plan ahead for college. I have a 6th grader and see the stats about private college costs per year now being more than $60k. With a $225k HHI and a little bit of non-retirement investments, I'm guessing it's unlikely that we'd qualify for any financial aid except perhaps a few thousand bucks in student loans. So.. wow, how do people manage this? There must be ways to lower this price tag. My kid's not going to get an athletic scholarship - but it's hard to imagine people really paying $60k per year. Do private schools offer any merit aid for academics, etc? Do families cobble together smaller scholarships ($500 here, $1k there) to knock down the price?
We have a 529 for DC but we'll be lucky if there's $100k in there by the time our 12 yr old goes to college. (We have younger kids, too). It's surprising to me how much college costs have risen. Even after accounting for inflation, the private college I attended is still almost $20k more expensive in real terms than when I went 20 years ago.

The vast majority of schools do offer merit aid/scholarships to good students. The ones that don't are ranked at the top of the US News & World Report list, and they don't need to award merit money because thanks to their rankings, they attract plenty of people able and willing to pay full price. (Those who qualify for need-based aid can also attend these schools - but those of us in the "donut hole" where we neither qualify for FA nor can pay $65K+ cannot send our kids to these schools without hefty loans.)

Cobbling together smaller scholarships is not the approach you want to take. You want to seek out schools that offer hefty scholarships to good students. You can find these by googling "colleges and universities merit aid scholarships" or similar search terms.

The College Solution is an excellent, very well-researched book about how to pay for college. The author has a blog as well:

http://www.thecollegesolution.com/welcome

There is a thread about this on the College board here at DCUM:

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/529245.page

You can also register at College Confidential and read about how to employ this strategy:

http://www.collegeconfidential.com

Our daughter was admitted to several of the private women's colleges in VA and with merit aid, they all turned out to be cheaper for us than a state school. College Confidential has lots of forums about which schools give merit aid based on SAT"s, etc.

I have two kids at private colleges (second tier LAC's) and we are paying less than we would pay for state schools. You need to do your research, don't be scared by the sticker price and ask LOTS Of questions. Call the admissions offices and ask "how many students generally get this level of aid and what is the average SAT, GPA, etc. to receive that award?" BY the way, the college cost estimators on the FAFSA, etc. all suggested we had 60K per kid per year stashed somewhere (in our money vault in our home, I guess) but the offers from the colleges were much more realistic.

Curious why you are so sold on a private. We were batting this around in another thread and unless snowflake is the next cello prodigy or gets into an Ivy the general consensus was that mid-tier privates make zero sense. They aren't much/any better than good state schools and don't confer instant employment benefits/resume boosters like an Ivy would yet end up racking up massive tuition bills. I went private twice, but DH went to state school and we're planning on state for our snowflake unless she miraculously ends up getting into an Ivy or has some bizarre talent that MUST be cultivated and only one special private school has that program.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When face with the same question, we moved to Virginia for the in state tuition.

That backfired for us. First child went out of state and second child is headed there too. If you child is really good in math/physics, they will want to go out of state. If your child is really good in engineering, they will want to go out of state.

And if your child needs accomodations for LDs, the main state schools have a terrible reputation.

Anonymous wrote:When face with the same question, we moved to Virginia for the in state tuition.

That backfired for us. First child went out of state and second child is headed there too. If you child is really good in math/physics, they will want to go out of state. If your child is really good in engineering, they will want to go out of state.

Your kid doesn't need to go to private college it you cant afford it. You need to be realistic about what you can afford and pick schools accordingly. Top private colleges aren't big on merit aid, but as the PP points out there are many private colleges who do provide merit aid. Obviously your DC needs to bring something to the table - scores, grades, geographic diversity, etc.

And you need to look at your in state public options or publics who are courting OOS kids (see today's Post article about Alabama).

But yes, there are those of us paying $60k plus in tuition. We've paid full freight for 2 kids.

Yes to the above.

Also, if you get away from the coasts and top 30 schools, you will find both private and OOS public options with great merit aid. My kid wanted to go to a private liberal arts college but we couldn't afford $60K/year so we focused the search on the Midwest and ending up netting $25K-$35K/year at every school to which she applied. (merit aid only. And she wasn't a tippy top student in high school, either. SATs in the 1900 range, GPA in the 3.7 range.)

Anonymous wrote:I'm beginning to try to plan ahead for college. I have a 6th grader and see the stats about private college costs per year now being more than $60k. With a $225k HHI and a little bit of non-retirement investments, I'm guessing it's unlikely that we'd qualify for any financial aid except perhaps a few thousand bucks in student loans. So.. wow, how do people manage this? There must be ways to lower this price tag. My kid's not going to get an athletic scholarship - but it's hard to imagine people really paying $60k per year. Do private schools offer any merit aid for academics, etc? Do families cobble together smaller scholarships ($500 here, $1k there) to knock down the price?
We have a 529 for DC but we'll be lucky if there's $100k in there by the time our 12 yr old goes to college. (We have younger kids, too). It's surprising to me how much college costs have risen. Even after accounting for inflation, the private college I attended is still almost $20k more expensive in real terms than when I went 20 years ago.

They send their kids to in- state public schools. Or their kids take out lots of loans.

When face with the same question, we moved to Virginia for the in state tuition.

I'm beginning to try to plan ahead for college. I have a 6th grader and see the stats about private college costs per year now being more than $60k. With a $225k HHI and a little bit of non-retirement investments, I'm guessing it's unlikely that we'd qualify for any financial aid except perhaps a few thousand bucks in student loans. So.. wow, how do people manage this? There must be ways to lower this price tag. My kid's not going to get an athletic scholarship - but it's hard to imagine people really paying $60k per year. Do private schools offer any merit aid for academics, etc? Do families cobble together smaller scholarships ($500 here, $1k there) to knock down the price?
We have a 529 for DC but we'll be lucky if there's $100k in there by the time our 12 yr old goes to college. (We have younger kids, too). It's surprising to me how much college costs have risen. Even after accounting for inflation, the private college I attended is still almost $20k more expensive in real terms than when I went 20 years ago.