OP, what school are you zoned for? There most be some kids close by that go to the local ES? Try to get involved with the school to meet families--some may have younger kids your children's age.

Anonymous wrote:You have 1.5 acres. Are there neighborhoods with lots that large that do have the community you're looking for?

OP here. I realize that many neighborhoods with large yards have less social neighborhoods. I am willing to have a smaller yard for a more social/family friendly neighborhood. I do love the large yard, but understand that there is usually a trade-off, because houses closer together usually means more of a social feel.

You have 1.5 acres. Are there neighborhoods with lots that large that do have the community you're looking for?

Anonymous wrote:The thing is, what if you move and then hate your neighbors? It's not something you can really reararch while buying the house. The neighborhood might be a nice social one, with lots of children, parties etc, but what if the neighbors next door are impossible? I've always worried about that, and so I heaitate to make it a big factor.

OP here. My husband is always saying this. He says it's too much of a risk/we'd lose too much money if we moved, because the next neighborhood may end up being similar.

OP here. How important is it to have friends in the neighborhood when you have kids? Because we have none and I don't think we ever will have any here. At first I figured we'll just find community elsewhere, but that has been difficult too.

On the other hand, finding a newer, updated house with a good sized yard in our price range closer in is difficult, which is why we bought out in Herndon. My husband has a 45 minute-1 hour commute to work.

The thing is, what if you move and then hate your neighbors? It's not something you can really reararch while buying the house. The neighborhood might be a nice social one, with lots of children, parties etc, but what if the neighbors next door are impossible? I've always worried about that, and so I heaitate to make it a big factor.

Anonymous wrote:Our neighborhood is like yours. But, I have met people in nearby neighborhoods which is nice, but not quite the same. However, this is not our forever house, and we plan on moving. The lack of community will be a big reason for our move. We'd consider staying if it was a better neighborhood even though the house is one room too small.

OP here. Our house is the right size for us, and we have enough space. But the lack of community bothers me every day. This blizzard and the unhelpfulness of the neighbors only emphasized for me how much I dislike it here.

I grew up in a similar neighborhood, where no one was friendly with each other and it was awful. I feel bad that we didn't really understand the importance of a social neighborhood when we were looking to buy.

We are selling our condo and buying a new place solely because of our neighbors. So, yes.

There are other factors too- but we originally planned to move in a year from now. We have new neighbors downstairs that smoke pot/cigs all the time, show no respect to the community... and yeah. We decided why wait?

Anonymous wrote:You bought in 2007 and spent $100,000 on renovations. Will you need to sell at a loss?

OP here. I think it's more like 150 in renovations. We pretty much renovated everything except the kitchen, which had already been done. With realtors fees we would be selling at a big loss.

The other issue is we put so much time and energy into the renovations that the house is beautiful, it would be hard to find another house in our price range that has already been updated, and with two young kids we don't have the time/energy to renovate/update.

Our neighborhood is like yours. But, I have met people in nearby neighborhoods which is nice, but not quite the same. However, this is not our forever house, and we plan on moving. The lack of community will be a big reason for our move. We'd consider staying if it was a better neighborhood even though the house is one room too small.

As someone who moved from a neighborhood like yours to a very social, friendly neighborhood I will say it was 100% worth it. We also lost money in the end, but it was totally worth it.

Yes, I would move.

Two choices:
-move now
-wait for the empty nesters to downsize and move out; they'll inevitably be replaced by younger families

You bought in 2007 and spent $100,000 on renovations. Will you need to sell at a loss?

This blizzard and how unhelpful/disinterested our neighbors have been throughout the blizzard has gotten me thinking about how much I dislike our neighborhood/neighbors and how I would love to move (but still stay in NoVA).

We bought our SFH in Herndon 8 years ago pre-kids. We were DINKS, this was our first home purchase, and it took us a year to find this house. It's a beautiful house, in a beautiful neighborhood, in a convenient location. We have 1.5 acres, and a gorgeous yard. We have put over $100,000 in renovations and upgrades into the house after we bought it. My husband also dislikes the neighborhood/neighbors but says we have spent too much money on renovations/have over-improved for the neighborhood and if we sold we would sell at a huge loss. I understand this, but also feel that you can't put a price on neighborliness and sense of community, and I am also very unhappy here.

The problem is that our neighborhood is mostly empty nesters and retirees, there are practically no kids (kids are mainly high school kids), and this is one of the most antisocial, apathetic neighborhoods I've ever heard of. We don't know our neighbors at all, and they are disinterested and rude, the kind who go back into the house if they see you outside, they gossip about us to other neighbors, and in general took a disliking to us the minute we moved in (because we are not in the demographic of the neighborhood).

We didn't really think about the importance of a sense of community/friendly/social neighborhood when we bought the house. Our neighborhood has no social events during the year, no parties, no listserv/Facebook page, and no sense of community spirit whatsoever. People here value their huge yards and keeping to themselves. This wasn't something that bothered me at first, but now that we have kids and I'm a SAHM, I would love to be in a neighborhood with a more family friendly atmosphere. Also, we are on the HOA board, but that has not facilitated meeting other neighbors or improving the unfriendliness situation at all.

We now have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old, and I'm a SAHM. I feel like we have no sense of community here. The yards are large and people keep to themselves. There is no street life, no kids outside playing, very few people walking, etc. because it's mostly empty nesters. We have no friends at all in this neighborhood and I doubt we ever will. I have introduced myself to a few moms I have met while out walking who have young kids, and they seemed completely disinterested in getting to know me/having playdates. Pretty much they're all full-time working moms who have nannies/au pairs.

Anyhow, just wondering what you would do if you also lived in such an awful neighborhood with awful neighbors. I don't feel happy in this neighborhood anymore, even though I really like our house and the location. I don't feel like it feels like home, or that we have put down any roots here, despite having lived here for 8 years now. I know that we can find community elsewhere other than neighborhood, but that really hasn't happened yet either, not at my toddler's preschool, or in moms groups I have joined, etc.