Anonymous
Post 01/22/2016 12:20     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I started with a random hookup before I tried dating. Less pressure- no emotional stake and I didn't have to worry as much about what he would think if my body or how I was "down there" after a baby. I'm not usually a random hookup type but it worked. [/quote

Same here. ]


OP here, I actually had a FWB (someone I knew before marriage) for about a year. But I broke things off with him and am looking for a normal relationship now.

I don't even know how to have a "random hookup." Did you just go to a bar or something? I am not cool enough to do that yet.


Tinder
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2016 12:18     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I started with a random hookup before I tried dating. Less pressure- no emotional stake and I didn't have to worry as much about what he would think if my body or how I was "down there" after a baby. I'm not usually a random hookup type but it worked. [/quote

Same here. ]


OP here, I actually had a FWB (someone I knew before marriage) for about a year. But I broke things off with him and am looking for a normal relationship now.

I don't even know how to have a "random hookup." Did you just go to a bar or something? I am not cool enough to do that yet.
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2016 12:11     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I started with a random hookup before I tried dating. Less pressure- no emotional stake and I didn't have to worry as much about what he would think if my body or how I was "down there" after a baby. I'm not usually a random hookup type but it worked. [/quote

Same here. ]
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 23:19     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Honestly, I started with a random hookup before I tried dating. Less pressure- no emotional stake and I didn't have to worry as much about what he would think if my body or how I was "down there" after a baby. I'm not usually a random hookup type but it worked.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 23:05     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I wasn't divorced, but did deal with an illness that kept me from dating for 6+ years. I loved OKCupid. I could go on when I wanted to. Answer questions, take quizzes, look at profiles, all at my leisure. I blocked IMing.

When my inbox got flooded with jerks, I just deleted the emails. When it was an email from someone nice, but I just wasn't interested in them, I sent them a short "I don't think we are a match" email. The ones I was interested in, I contacted. When it got to be a bit overwhelming, I would stop logging on for a few weeks.

I liked being in control.

Ended up meeting DH on there.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 22:57     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids?


OP here. I do have kids but only 50% of the time.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 22:54     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Do you have kids?
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 22:52     Subject: Re:After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I did OKCupid and it worked well for me. I was terrified to start dating, before my first date I thought I would puke, and then it was an excruciatingly boring date. But it gets so much easier after you meet a few people. I also make it clear to friends that I'm happy to be set up.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 21:05     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
It's hard. Be tough. If you find it draining, take a break. And then try again. Okcupid yielded weirdos. I think I need to reset the algorithm. Has anyone had to do that?
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 20:46     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I had a flirty friend with whom I broke the sexual ice. I felt safer with him, knew he liked me a lot, and it was easier to get naked and intimate with him than with a completely new person. After I loosened up a bit, I went on OKC and started dating. I've met quite a few interesting men, clicked with a handful, and have had a couple of relationships that lasted a few months. I'm so comfortable dating now; I've traveled an enormous mental distance from those early days of being terrified of exposing myself to someone new … You can do it, it'll be fun!
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 18:59     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I'm in pretty much the same boat. Recently separated and moved to North Carolina, any tips would be appreciated!
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 16:55     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
Anonymous wrote:I joined Ok Cupid.


Op here. I was thinking of doing that. How has it been for you?

Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 16:52     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I joined Ok Cupid.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 16:39     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I did a lot of non-dating mixed gender group outings such as the Young Adults' Ministry at my Parish, Meetups, volunteering. I got used to being available for flirting again.

A friend did coed softball and then coed flag football.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2016 16:36     Subject: After divorce, how did you "get back out there?"
I feel sort of paralyzed! The idea of actually going on a date and eventually getting naked in front of a new person is daunting.

How did you ease yourself back out into the dating world?