Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she was showing off - belittling you to make herself look better in front of her friends. Very insecure. This is reality-TV "real-housewives" type behavior. Break it off with her. You'll be rid of an insincere person and she may learn the limitations of that kind of behavior - or she may find people who appreciate it.

I found out that she had told her friends that the reason I didn't come out with them was because I had too much to drink and was unable to get to the bar.

Sounds like she was showing off - belittling you to make herself look better in front of her friends. Very insecure. This is reality-TV "real-housewives" type behavior. Break it off with her. You'll be rid of an insincere person and she may learn the limitations of that kind of behavior - or she may find people who appreciate it.

Anonymous wrote:So you weren't paying attention to something that was important to her and she flips out.

Her reaction seems way over the top, but I bet if we were to have a chat with girlfriend we'd see a pattern of behavior where she feels ignored by you.

Bottom line I don't think you two belong together. It's clear she needs to grow up, and you probably do to even though you tried to show us how perfect and mature you are in your OP.
Good luck in the new year.

OP here. We do communicate really well and she repeatedly tells me how grateful and appreciative she is to have someone like me who cares about her so much and treats her well. I can assure you this episode was not triggered by a pattern of me being inattentive to her or her needs.

Besides, she's superstitious!

Drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts. Or in this case, woman's.

Anonymous wrote:This is not the sort of thing that gets better. She's showing you how she handles it when things don't go her way. This was about a NYE celebration, and she was unkind. Imagine when it's something serious? You date to learn about the other person and figure out if you're compatible. This was not a good sign.

LISTEN TO THIS WISDOM OP!

This is not the sort of thing that gets better. She's showing you how she handles it when things don't go her way. This was about a NYE celebration, and she was unkind. Imagine when it's something serious? You date to learn about the other person and figure out if you're compatible. This was not a good sign.

So you weren't paying attention to something that was important to her and she flips out.

Her reaction seems way over the top, but I bet if we were to have a chat with girlfriend we'd see a pattern of behavior where she feels ignored by you.

Bottom line I don't think you two belong together. It's clear she needs to grow up, and you probably do to even though you tried to show us how perfect and mature you are in your OP.
Good luck in the new year.

She exposed what she truly thinks. You should listen. Find someone more compatible with you.

Sounds like a waste of your time. Also you mentioned her relationships with her friends--mile wide, inch deep. Is this really the kind of relationships you want the person you marry to have?

Was she drunk? Not that it matters; she sounds spoiled and domineering and belittling. I'd bail.

Anonymous wrote:She was clearly drunk on cheap champagne.

That stops being a valid excuse for bad behavior once you graduate college.

I think she is not the right person for you. It could have been handled so much better if she'd noticed you drank your water, laughed about it, and poured you some of hers so you could pour some out. You made a mistake and she yelled at you, then embarrassed you in front of her friends, then continued doing it when you told her to stop, then taunted you. Her immaturity is astounding. I think you can do better. New year, new girlfriend. Move on.

She was clearly drunk on cheap champagne.

I'm a 23yo guy, she is 24. We've been together for 2 years.

For NYE we had a big group of her high school friends over in her apartment. We live in the same building but she lives in a 2BR with a roommate and I have my own studio. She comes from a Spanish/Italian family where there's a symbolic tradition to fill a cup of water in 2015 and then pour it out once the clock rolls over to "discard" 2015. She explained the tradition to the group and gave everyone a plastic cup. I wasn't really paying attention and I drank the cup of water. On the walk outside the building to discard the water, she realizes I drank it and starts berating me in front of her friends. What a child I am, how she feels like she's my mother, I never listen/understand her, etc.

We were walking to a paid NYE event shortly thereafter and once we get a little in front of the group she continues tearing into me. I turned to her and said something to the effect of "If you don't stop this right now, I'm going to turn around and go home. I'm going to this paid NYE event even though I don't want to and I don't need to listen to you criticize me on the whole walk there". She continued, and so I turned around and went back to my apartment.

She came back to my apartment and told me the visitors were her friends and that I don't have any friends. I'm extremely close with 3 guys and one of them lives in SF (so I don't get to see him that often), and she has more of a mile-wide inch-deep relationship with her female acquaintances so I suspect that's why she would say that. Regardless, the remark made no sense in the context of our argument and it was clear she just trying to be hurtful. She said "I'm leaving and if you don't come with me we're done". I said "I think you're being really unreasonable, but if that's what you want". I then went up to grab my stuff from her apartment, and on the way in the elevator she was gleefully rubbing in my face how she is going to a bar with her friends and I'm not. I didn't go with her and fell asleep.

The next morning, I sent her a text that said "I am really really disappointed in your behavior towards me last night". She came down to my apartment and was really apologetic for being "nasty bitch". I explained that I'm not sure why she'd say she feels like my mother or that she takes care of me. I do well for myself, I am totally self-sufficient, and have my life together for a 20-something let alone a 23 year old. She is a self-admittedly bossy and sometimes controlling person, and she said she thought it might be more a function of that vs me being immature or in need of someone to take care of me.

I have literally never had a significant other be so vindictive and deliberately hurtful, I almost feel like I saw a side of her personality that does not bode well for the future. I don't know what to do from here.