You may want to hire a consultant to help guide you through the process.

Our plan has always been to pull our DS out for middle school, home school, and travel the world or something. And that was before we found out he's autistic. Middle school is hell for every kid. Or at least that's how I remember it!

Anonymous wrote:I should add, DC is in mid-elementary school and if we don't mainstream now, we will almost certainly mainstream for middle school. But maybe elementary school is an easier time to switch -- or maybe a few more years of support will make the switch smoother.

I would start with talking with your kid's current teachers. Get their take on what supports if an may still be needed and could be implemented at a non-SN private school. You could even ask admissions as to where other students have gone if you're need a sense of where you might go.

What private schools did you have in mind?

One aspect to consider is that in middle school, there are so many other changes a youngster has to deal with and peer friendships and peer pressure are certainly two key ones. I would think that moving him to any school setting in which he would get to know kids before middle school would be so much better than being the new kid on the block in MS and trying to fit in. It might be helpful to talk to administrators at the new school to see what they might advise or have found works best. If a number of kids do transfer in for or in MS, it might be OK. Sounds like your DS is making nice progress. You are right to have the supports fade to a level he is likely to encounter in the new school setting over time.

I should add, DC is in mid-elementary school and if we don't mainstream now, we will almost certainly mainstream for middle school. But maybe elementary school is an easier time to switch -- or maybe a few more years of support will make the switch smoother.

This is DC's 4th year in a SN private and he's doing really well, including this year when the supports have been scaled back some. So we're considering mainstreaming him (to a mainstream private, public is still too big). But we're also thinking that if he's doing well, we shouldn't change anything. But we don't want to shortchange him, if he really is capable of handling mainstream.

How to decide? If you've made this change, what are some things that you've considered?