No explanation is needed. When child sees cast, child asks dad, how'd that happen? Let dad explain.
Do not involve yourself in any explanation. It is warped. Not your arm, not your fight, not your explanation.

Anonymous wrote:It was NOT a little fight. It was pretty serious (hence the statement that my ex is an idiot - I don't belittle ex to the kid ever but ex belittles me to the kid constantly, including telling kid that if I wasn't breastfeeding when we split that ex would have custody now. That's not true because I got custody for many reasons, including physical abuse)

Have you considered modifying the visitation order to Supervised Visitation Only? three factors:
1) physical abuse led to your custody of the child
2) fight was physical and probably involved alcohol
3) his statements about you to the child

At the very least, I would try to postpone visits (outside your home anyway) until your Ex has fully recovered in case of emergencies.

Well you slept with him. Sorry Tommy, mommy slept with a loser and we are going to pay for it forever.

Just say daddy fell. Nothing more, nothing less.

"Dad sometimes does not make the right decisions. He got into a fight and this is why he looks like this (visible cuts and scrapes)."

That's what I would say, because it's true and doesn't contain insults your child could hurl about. It absolutely needs to be said, because your child must understand that when he is alone with his father, he has to exercise due precaution. Even at this early age.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion is that you be an adult (sounds like your child needs one in his/her life) and not share this information with a young child.

Ex is going to be wearing a cast and may still have abrasions the next time my child sees ex. Kid needs to know something happened before he gets freaked out.

That's the beauty of this situation. Let your ex explain. Your child will put 2 and 2 together over the years and figure out that he is an ass all on his own.

If a visit actually happens before the cast is removed, you can tell your son that his father broke his arm. If he asks how, you say that you aren't exactly sure, he can ask his dad. Really, I doubt your child will be freaked out by a cast.

It was NOT a little fight. It was pretty serious (hence the statement that my ex is an idiot - I don't belittle ex to the kid ever but ex belittles me to the kid constantly, including telling kid that if I wasn't breastfeeding when we split that ex would have custody now. That's not true because I got custody for many reasons, including physical abuse)

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion is that you be an adult (sounds like your child needs one in his/her life) and not share this information with a young child.

Ex is going to be wearing a cast and may still have abrasions the next time my child sees ex. Kid needs to know something happened before he gets freaked out.

Anonymous wrote:My suggestion is that you be an adult (sounds like your child needs one in his/her life) and not share this information with a young child.

This X1,000.

My suggestion is that you be an adult (sounds like your child needs one in his/her life) and not share this information with a young child.

Why in the hell would you tell your child about the incident? Also, you let the idiot fuck and impregnant you. Dont bad mouth his father, who no matter how fucked up he may be, in front of the child. Get some parenting classes. Cant believe you would expose your child to this

You say nothing if it doesn't directly impact your child right now. There is no good that comes from belittling your ex. Your child will see these things himself over time.

Your child comes from you ex's genes, too. Telling your kid that his father is an idiot is not a great way for them to develop their own self esteem over time.

Why do you have to tell your child anything? And why do you need the police report? I think you're pretty unlikely to get it since you weren't involved.

You don't.

...that my ex is an idiot? In not so many words of course. My ex got in a fight yesterday, and ended up with some injuries. He may or may not have been drunk. I'm trying to figure out how to get the police report.

Ex doesn't want to upset the kid. I think ex is a moron and I'm extra thankful today hat I have primary custody (ex is out of state).

Suggestions?